poetry dump #3 (last part for now)

yeah this one is repeating strangely & also bad & unoriginal

--

i am a rock

nothing bothers me

nothing can shatter my wind-polished stone

hate has made me unbreakable & unbreakable i will be,

forever.

(although nothing stops the cracks from running like rivers across my skin)

i am a rock

nothing shakes me

nothing can move my tear-stained stone

neglect has made me indifferent & indifferent i will be,

forever.

(although nothing stops the thoughts from raging carelessly inside)

i am a rock

nothing warms me

nothing can bring happiness to my dreary-grey stone

hiding has made me depressed & depressed i will be,

forever. 

(although nothing stops the glow from burning away my bones) 

i am a rock

though i say that nothing hurts me,

your words still burn deep into my soul; my gossamer-spun stone

time has made me realize how broken i can be-

(although nobody ever said i had to show it) 

Isn't it such a shame to see

A door opened,

Revealing a bright world

you'd nearly forgotten about--

One where you don't know every face

Or know all the words you want to use

But that's okay since there's still time to learn;

And not every day will be sunny and blue,

But at least you can see the road before you

And you know that there is something better out there

Some far-off goal to reach for because it'll all be worth it--

Only for it to be snatched away by the 

Black-matter-made hands of Real Life;

Dragging you, drowning you

In the sea ink, taking everything 

Meant for hope and light and growth

And stashing it away in its black cloaked pocket,

With no intention of ever using it, 

Only keeping it from you;

And suddenly the world is back to its dark-washed glaze

Where shadows bleed into everything and steal colour

Until there is nothing left but you and the blackness;

And soon there will only be the dark. 

Then knowing that even if you escape, 

You will only taint that bright place with your dark,

There is no hope for a future

Of anything, but this cursed place. 

It is then I wonder.

Would have been better

Had I never seen the light at all?

I lose myself in the dark--

I hate that bitter feeling

And truly can't tell whether it's better

Than feeling nothing at all; 

I see that innocence, through a world

That puts you through so much you don't deserve

And hate myself for that jealousy;

After all, the world treats none of us gently

So what am I doing here, tearing you further down

Even if it's only in my head?

You don't deserve it,

And I don't deserve your eyes on me, attention

Or those rare days when I don't think I'm going to

The darkness forevermore.

I should just lock me up in a bottle

Toss it out to sea 

And be someone else

Who isn't so ugly inside and out.

Maybe that's part of the promblem,

But I'll never know 

So I just sink into the sea below. 

I lie, yea, I lie;

'Cause I know it'll happen again

But I try, yea I try;

Just in case this moment won't end

'Nd I hold my breath again,

Forget to breathe out after [breathin'] in

Wondering if it'll happen again--

'Nd I lie, ooh, I lie;

Trying to keep the cryin' in,

'Nd lie, yeah I lie;

Just waitin' for this moment to end

And just like that it ends,

Takes my heart and breaks it in

Fooling me hard, once again--

Just a fool, heartrent, again~

~~~~~~~~~~ 

Just another neat-sounding song I spontaneously came up with. 

This was the original poem of the poem I posted for the poetry contest.

Also, admin, this is not personal. I just came up with it.

Younger Friends

When we were friends

We were young

We were forever

We wrote songs unsung.

You were happy

So was I.

You found a frog

To identify.

We climbed up walls

Much too high

We couldn’t make it

Our strength ran dry.

We laughed

We smiled

We jumped

We piled

We have fun times

We have sad times

All mix together

Sometimes

You wanted to fly

We tried and tried

Never could

But you didn’t cry

We were happy

To get a gift

From each other

Just to lift

We were friends

Weren’t we?

You still remember, right?

When you left oversea?

I will remember

I guess you forget

The times we earned

And those we regret.

Now we are stuck

Within the rift

Of loneliness and sadness

Cursed to forever drift

Alone.

When we were younger,

We were friends

Now we remember

And you came back. 

A happy poem, for once!

My Meaning of Life

I think I’ve been looking at life

in too serious of a light.

Life is just another flap of a butterfly’s wings

another drop of honey

another bluebird’s song

another beautiful imperfect glimpse of nature.

I’ve been overthinking.

I wish I just looked at life with joy.

This is beautiful this is rare this is amazing

and I’m here to see it.

It’s all really wonderful.

See that crack in the floor?

Do you see a dance?

A pattern?

A split dug into the granite?

See the dust gathering under that table?

Is it almost greyish purple

like fairy wings?

See the light reflecting off the glass?

Is it smooth like butter?

Sharp like ice?

I’ve been too serious with everything.

It’s just a little spark of joy

a light reflecting in the ocean

a smooth pebble, worn down by the water.

Life is just a quick little dance.

I should’ve been having fun with it, 

not dragging myself down with

pain and perfection and stress and worry.

I can appreciate the little things

and see the big picture.

It’s all beautiful.

I see it now,

this cluttered mess of a school

the lawn outside with the dead grass

the plain walls painted grey

the crumbs on the floor

they’re all beautiful.

I get it now.

I understand.

The meaning of life was never supposed to be as hard

as everybody made it out to be.