First of all, Merry Christmas guys!! I'm not sure how much of a big deal that is to you, but I'm sooo excited for the day to begin! I hope you guys have a great day :D

Ooh I have a best friend who used to go to ballet school! She did it for a longgg time, and I would go see her in the nutcracker often, but I suspect she really only did it because of her mom's high position at the ballet school and not because she really wanted to. She quit a few years ago, but her mom still works at the school and gave the opening remarks at the nutcracker a few days ago when I was over for a sleepover.

Have either of you seen the Percy Jackson show yet??? I saw it with aforementioned best friend and our little siblings. All four of us have been PJO kids since grade school and we prepared all kinds of blue candy, blue drinks, blue cookies, and blue macarons for the watch party! Plus all of our combined PJO themed pillows and blankets (which is quite a few). It was soo fun and I really liked the first two episodes although I think it's a little hard to judge a show based on it's pilot(s).

Honestly don't know how I have the attention to watch those long videos. I always have to be multitasking- like watching and writing, or doing homework, or making a collage or something, otherwise I get bored.

BB, please go into YA and MG. I pretty much only read adult fiction now, because I got so fed up with YA and realized that I could read actual good, inventive books that weren't trapped by the YA Formula, which plagues the whole industry. There are some exceptions, but mostly it just got frustrating when I would read a book and know exactly what was going to happen next because it was so predictable. Also, I feel like the whole genre of YA has been reinvented by TikTok and other social media not for the better- although I appreciate BookTok and other book centric social medias for making a lot of people interested in reading again and helping out bookstores in a big way, I just think the books they tend to focus on are... not very good. And I've read most of them, trust me. It just kind of annoys me, how all they're ever talking about is either ~aesthetics~ or that one unlikable, dark, antagonistic male love interest that's usually super toxic, too. Idk it just gets on my nerves sometimes ://

I do celebrate lunar new year! My family tends to call it Korean New Year, but tbh I think lunar new year sounds prettier. Me and my family all go up to the same relative's house in Jan and hang out there for the day. It's super fun, and we get a huge homecooked Korean meal from my dad's cousin. And money, too (although we have to do the whole bowing-for-the-envelopes thing which can get a little tedious). I really enjoy it :)

I also can't really stand boba- not just because it's so popular, but also because I think it just kind of tastes gross. But I'm not complaining because whenever I go with someone to a boba place they also usually have a banger mango smoothie too, which is my favorite.

Ok, signing of now! Hope you guys have a great Christmas <3333 

Ah, I'm the opposite, BB. I'm also pretty good at singing, and absolutely indulge in it all the time in private, but speaking or singing in public has always been horrible for me. The moment eyes turn to me/I get on stage I go quiet (silent, or not loud enough if I do manage to get anything out). On the other hand, I can dance/act/play an instrument perfectly well, almost as if there is no pressure at all. 

Ooh! Your reading seems interesting! (I have dyslexia and generally bad vision even with glasses so I usually prefer to listen rather than actually read, but I totally get just wanting to do so. When I was younger I would get stubborn and try to push through reading without taking the "easy way out" by asking someone to read to me. I also play around with playback speed a lot, adjusting from like 3× speed to 0.75-ish, usually on the faster end. It's actually kinda strange because I often miss/need spoken or written repetition to understand things that are said in-person, regardless of speed. Perhaps it's just the comfort that comes with the ability to seamlessly rewind.) To be fair, I can't 'watch' videos for more than a few minutes either, but I like to listen to them as I do other things.

I read just whatever looks interesting (skewing towards mystery/thriller, historical and fantasy stuff), but a fair amount does end up being YA-adjacent ig. Not particularly attached to that genre though; there seems to often be a lot of formulaic melodrama and romantic subplots, both of which tend to hold less appeal for me. Do go on if you have time about your contentions with this kind of stuff. I'm not terribly invested myself, but I'd love to hear someone passionate tear this apart lol. (Also I don't wanna be that one annoying queer, but I can't with these toxic, usually straight 'love interests' sometimes TAT Just no. I get really bothered, especially when it's a girl accepting a guy's trashy behaviour as 'love,' ugh.)

OMG I LOVE MOCHI-

If you love boba, just try to let yourself enjoy it, I'd say. It isn't my favourite (especially with the little pearls), but I can definitely tell its pretty popular. Same thing with what you read. I get it can make you feel a little silly, but I'd suggest not letting the public theatre dictate your decisions. Like what you like without fear of judgement, if you can (i do know how hard it can be, but still). (Off-topic, but I totally get not wanting to do something, mainly because it's popular lol; whether it's using keeping up with celebrities or 'dabbing' or using a fidget spinner or playing Fortnite, I've stayed away from all of that for the same reason. Idk, maybe this is why I'm so awkward tho'. I just don't want to be stripped of identity by letting myself succumb to the whims of pop culture ig).

Ooh, I have Hanukkah, which is also a lunar-calendar practice, and for Mandarin class we do a Chinese New Year celebration (last year, we performed a song in front of a whole assembly! I was the drummer lol, but i technically sang too). Sorry if I'm, like, inserting myself into your conversation :/

OH YEAH AND ABOUT BALLET: So yes, I've been in and seen, like, at least 15 productions, just for ballet (we had to take supplemental classes for tap, jazz, modern, etc. if we wanted to persue ballet past a certain point, which all had their own performances). I've been in the Nutcracker several times (we used to do it every winter); as a mouse, a soldier, a polichenelle, a Spanish dancer, a snow-fairy, a snow-angel-thingie, and as a guy in the party scenes. Often here was overlap (you'd do a couple positions in one show, before graduating to the next set of positions).

OMG SILVER ONE OF MY FRIENDS MENTIONED THE NEW PJ SHOW- They were so excited that I took a look at it, and it seems more inclusive and natural, so I'm pensively optimistic??? (Also is it just me or is Grover like really pretty???)

Yeah I totally see what you're saying BB! As for the aesthetics thing, I was talking more about how bored I get with wanting to see actual analyses and discussions about books and stuff but end up just seeing a bunch of fifteen second videos like 'omg the aesthetic of [insert fantasy world here]' followed by a bunch of pictures ripped from pintrest in quick succession. Idk nothing really wrong with that but like... where's the substance booktok??

You're soo right, why are YA books so dark?? I've been reading mostly adult fiction books nowadays and am suprised by how less violent and angsty than the YA that I'm used to. I mostly agree with what you're saying about mental health being written by authors who haven't necessarily gone through the things that they're writing, but I've also seen authors get critisized for not including enough mental health themes in their writing, espeically when the characters have gone through a fair amount of stress and trauma as they tend to do in YA books. I think the term 'mental health' encompasses such a vast range of experiences that it's impossible to write a portrayal that everyone will relate to/agree with. It's tricky for sure. But I definitely agree that many teenagers in YA are being written with mental health themes that seem very disengenious.

Also yeah, I've noticed that the age for YA protagonists has gone up to 18. Almost every recent YA book I've read has the protagonist be at least 18. Bc let's be honest, the vast amount of YA protags (I'm thinking mainly fantasy rn) are older teenage girls who end up with guys who range from a year or two older than them to thousands of years older than them which is somehow okay (coughcough shadow and bone coughcough), so them being 'technically legal' is preferred even if the books take place in an alternate world. Which is... a little strange. 

Once I figured out that I could just choose to not read YA I felt strangely liberated- like I'll always have those YA books that I really like and I'll probably end up reading a YA book every now and then but it's actually soo fun reading regular fiction that doesn't feel like it needs to fit within a certain YA box and follow its rules, you know? Anyway I don't really know if any of that made any sense it's pretty late :P Have a good day (night?) guys!!

I concur with you on that; mental health exploitation media seems to be pretty prevalent. I think it's always been that way to a certain extent, but is now becoming popular in a weird pop-cultural way. 

Again, I kind of have mixed feelings about the heavy focus darker subjects as a whole, though, lol. On one hand, I think it's vital for people to be able to address and experience darkness, even if only through stories. It helps people learn how to process difficult emotions and situations. Not everyone has these struggles, and it can make people who do suffer feel seen/heard, as well as illuminate their stories to a largely apathetic world. Personally, I can relate to reading painful stories similar to my own (or even just similar in spirit, not content) that help me heal and feel empowered. At the same time, it's definitely kinda gross how... fetishised? a lot of mental health issues can be portrayed. It's also tough when the portrayal is warped, if not flat-out inaccurate. Especially for people who don't have mental health "issues" to the degree of others, it can feel very bad-faith, as if putting on a 'freak-show' for those "unafflicted" with mental illness/the like. Like, yes, it brings attention to the subject, but is it the kind of attention we want? I also get just being unable to consume content that contains certain dark aspects in a productive manner. I can't really go into detail on the chatterbox, but certain experiences just don't need to be reexperienced over and over again by some people. However, I think that's kind of where we, as readers/consumers hold the reigns. If it's too much, we can put the book down or press pause; it's our choice, in the end. That's the beauty of media, unlike real life, if it isn't sitting well with us, we can just not partake in it anymore. We can choose to do something else with our time. It won't solve the 'issue,' but I believe that most things do hold value to someone, and even if it is only for that one person in the world, that is enough of a reason for that object to exist. You certainly don't have to read books that you find triggering. It is a shame that you feel like to avoid certain genres because of their content, but that doesn't mean that kind of story doesn't mean a lot to someone else, so it's not like it shouldn't exist. Of course, I'm not suggesting that you were saying something like "all books with dark content should be burned" or something like that, but I'd like to invite you to keep an open mind to things that we may not love, too. Admittedly, I don't really enjoy grimdark either though, it's just not for me.

I get the age thing, too. I relate to feeling too old to be so lacking maturity in far too many ways. I think the whole idea of "act your age" is a little messed up, especially for neurodivergent and developmentally stunted individuals, but really applying to everybody. Like, I understand wanting a middle-aged adult to be mature, but when it comes down to specific years, humans weren't 'programmed' with a calendar in mind; individuals develop at different rates, and that's ok. It's natural. It's absurd to expect uniformity in such a variable. 

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and opinions! They are fascinating to read. :) 

No you're totally right! There are tons of bad takes about mental health esp in YA books, but all around. God I hate hate hate the 'tiktokification' of mental illness. Like how the whole internet decided that depression was a 'normal' mental illness and how anxiety is the 'easy' mental illness. Those tiktoks that are like 'if you've ever felt any of these symptoms then you have anxiety!' followed by a list of normal reactions to getting worried or nervous. Making some mental illnesses (ex schizophrenia) seem more stygmatized while trivializing other ones, like anxiety and depression, which are very serious and can make living a regular life incredibly difficult. The term 'delulu' becoming soo common in social media and regular slang which I hate because no you're not having delusions you're just having human thoughts. I saw a post once where someone who had actual delusions related to mental illness tried to tell a friend of theirs about a delusion they had once had to which the friend responded: 'honey you're not delulu that's just straight up crazy'. By circulating a term related to mental illness around social media and the internet it eventually dilutes it and makes it not about that anymore, while also trivializing it. Same with people on tiktok talking about their 'intrusive thoughts' which are regular impulsive thoughts, or their 'OCD' which is just them liking to be organized. Once a term is used so much outside of its original meaning it starts to mean something else, you know? Anyway sorry for the rant :/

You're soo correct, I agree with pretty much everything that you said. I hope I wasn't sounding before like I wanted to burn all dark books or something, that's not what I meant at all. I especially related to what you said about media glorifying suffering and mental illness and I'd take it a step further and say that lots of parts of society seem to do that as well. Namely the queer community tends to glorify mental illness to a point that becomes unhealthy, or at least that's what I've noticed at my school, which is around one-third to half queer. It actually concerns me a lot, because the line between 'lots of queer kids have struggles with mental health and it's good and healthy to destygmatize it and talk to other queer kids with similar experiences' and 'queer culture is mental illness culture and it's now Cool to have depression and if you don't have at least one mental illness are you really queer?' (which I've actually heard people say at my school before) is thin and blurred a lot. Noticeably, the 'cool' groups of queer kids are the people that I see this happening the most to. 

Anwayy those are my (jumbled) thoughts, hope you guys are having a great day!! <33 

No rush to respond BB, take your time! As for my favorite PJO/HOO characters I've always been a Piper girlie for some reason. I also loveee Annabeth and Percy both as a couple and as seperate characters. They're probably the two best written and developed chracters in all of his books. Big Thalia and Reyna fan as well. Jason is sooo frustrating bc he had the potential to have the most interesting backstory and personality and such but it feels like he was underutilized?? Plus things that happen in later books with him that make me very upset...

Thanks for sharing about all this, too! Lol as someone raised very conservatively, having to rise out of that on my own, without guidance, I worry a lot about offending people who I like and associate with. Especially when I see/experience how easy it is to hurt people unintentionally. (For example, I've had little kids come up to me in religious settings and ask me "are you a boy or a girl?" likely brought up from my fairly androgynous gender-expression. Despite knowing they're just young and simply don't know because of their upbringing, it still hurt a lot and made me incredibly uncomfortable. I literally got sick and threw up the first time that happened.) I really don't want to put anyone in that situation, especially when they're just trying to figure themselves out.

Ooh, mostly unrelated, but I was going through security the other day (without a hat on? especially in the winter??? I know, how very uncharacteristic of me! it's relevant because I have very short hair, 'specially for a femme) and one of the security guys said something like "have a nice day, sir" when they finished checking me and at first I was confused, like, who? me??? but then I literally got so excited. It just makes me so happy to be misgendered in a masc-favourable way sometimes. Not that I do see myself as a dude, it's just sometimes vindicating when I'm often assumed to be female (my assigned gender) instead, having short hair and generally putting effort into coming across as more gender-neutral (and thus usually making myself appear more masc by default). 

Also, thank you for your advice BB. It's truly helpful and I appreciate it a lot. I don't have much to say, except to thank you, but it really does mean a lot to me. <3<3<3