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Funny Things my
Chatterbox: Chirp at Cricket
Funny Things my
Funny Things my Friends Have Said, because Leafy's one died but this idea is too good to not have a thread for. Post your funny things here!
-"YOU SAW ENDGAME? YOU SAW ENDGAME? YOU SAW ENDGAME? YOU SAW ENDGAME? *continued*"
-"Which joke is dirtier, Oliver's Cheetos or the fajitas?"
-"Keep it PG, we say *censored* here"
-"Rest in pieces, fidget pen."
-"Can you do me a favor and put a 'kick me' sign on Oliver?"
-"Captain America is just a 100-year old guy on steriods with a frisbee"
-"You're so disappointed by my lack of Super Mario knowledge"
-Gavin: Eliza is just a girl with messy hair and insomnia
Me: Hey that's not wrong
-"If I saw Dear Evan Hansen my soul would become a pile of goo on the floor."
-"You look like Shrek"
-"I think Logan just called me mentally weak"
-"Oliver should run the 666-meter in track!"
-"This confetti sucks"
-"I am SORRY I do not know what a METHANE HYDRATE IS-"
submitted by Soren Infinity, age 27 eons , BeaconTown
(April 27, 2019 - 11:05 am)
(April 27, 2019 - 11:05 am)
Haha! These are great!
Here are some from my Literacy class (Keep in mind we are supposed to be "gifted")
-Our Teacher: "Michael, you look uncomfortable. I'll give the class an extension."
-Our whole class chanting rhythmically: "wheel of doom! Wheel of doom! WHEEL OF DOOM! WHE-"
-Our Teacher: "Can someone go get my Jimmy Johns from the office?"
-"Sean, what does grass mean? Wait wait no"
-"Not to be that cannibalism person again, but I'm just saying they probably ate her,"
-"Eight times five is negative eighteen"
-Our teacher: "Kate...ie? Kate? Katie? I mean Kate- wait..."
-"Guys help me hide the books!" (our teacher walks in) "Nevermind..."
-Logan: "Sean is like a horse"
Sean: "I can't tell if that's a compliment or an insult"
Logan: "Like a work horse"
-"Why are you kissing your arm?"
-"He's just sitting there... sniffing the chair"
-Our teacher, screaming because of the spider in the classroom: "Don't swat at it, kill it! Logan, you imbecile!"
-"I'm a hungry boy"
-"I enjoy the cold moistness of strawberries"
-Our teacher: "Because you all read the book-"
Owen: "Tooootally..."
-"I'm gonna read this book SO HARD!"
-Our teacher: "Or, of course, if you lost yours because you're a delinquent-"
(April 27, 2019 - 12:51 pm)
"Is that a jar of dead bats in the corner?!"
"Well back in the days when I was a penguin, I walked headfirst into a truck -"
"Are you looking for brains? Sorry, I don't have any"
"Guys, I have something to say
"POKEMON"
"The guinea pig got whomped out of Harry Potter's lap!"
"Lionel is hideous."
"Haven't you died, like, twice?"
"No, more like five times . . . . . . "
"She took my pizza and left me!!!!"
"You're just a rated R little boy -"
"Rated R? Jiji, YOU'RE rated R!"
"Your nose is so squishy! Squish, squish"
"Help, my kneecap fell off again!"
I just realized that some of those are things I said, but were repeated afterwards. Oh, well. I know there are funnier things, but those are the ones I remember.
(April 27, 2019 - 7:27 pm)
I forgot two really good ones!
-"GAVIN IS THANOS! He used the reality stone to disguise himself as a smol 11-year-old-boi and get information from me because I'm Captain America's girlfriend!"
-"Yup, nobody cares about C. He's just gonna become a homeless guy on the side of the road with a cardbaord sign saying "im hungry" and then everone will feel bad for him so they'll buy him greasy Mconald's burgers from the one-dollar menu."
(April 27, 2019 - 10:45 pm)
”I like upbeat songs.”
”Can we PLEASE call someone Granny Puckins!? I’m putting a vote on C.”
”Hey, I’m a legend. Legends can stay up till the sun comes up.”
”You chillin’ talk so bloomin’ much! Foolish youngster! You know nothing of the world!”
(April 28, 2019 - 10:38 am)
Oh, I have so many of these. I may do this in multiple parts, because my friends say some wierd stuff, let me tell you.
-"Thanos is Ender Wiggin!"
-"Is the chair okay?"
-"Have a weekend."
-"She's in seventh grade!"
-"What year is it?"
-"Earrings!"
-"I had to google what a pentagon was."
-"Are squares and circles the same shape, then?"
(If you want context on any of these, I am happy to explain!)
(April 28, 2019 - 12:13 pm)
Ah, this thread's back! My legacy! I always love reading through all these.
• • • •
- "Why am I holding hot sauce in all of these photos? Someone AirDrop me some without the hot sauce."
- "My aunt Cathy overdosed on carrots."
- "Nothing boosts your self esteem like hanging out with me."
- T: "What's your favorite non-water beverage?"
J: "The blood of people who unironically use emojis to express their emotions."
E: "Please stay away from my mom."
- "I like to use big words to sound more photosynthesis!"
- E: "11:11! Make a wish!"
P: "11:11! Distinctly imagine your ideal first-born child!"
- *completely deadpan* "No sarcasm at [school]. It's frowned upon by the administration."
- "Someone started playing a video of a crying bunny in math and it triggered maternal instincts I didn't even know I had."
(April 28, 2019 - 1:47 pm)
Abigail, that last quote is just . . . . . . . . so perfect.
(April 28, 2019 - 3:00 pm)
Haha I love that last one!
(April 28, 2019 - 3:28 pm)
Yo, were your friends talking about the 11:11 thing quoting something, because if not, I saw those exact quotes on a tumblr incorrect quote page.
(September 20, 2019 - 8:15 pm)
Yes that last one is great.
(February 23, 2020 - 3:31 pm)
"They got their dance. This is all that matters to me now. Thank you for ditching Sharon."
(April 28, 2019 - 8:28 pm)
Ha, yes. Me. XD
(April 30, 2019 - 8:17 am)
- L: I feel like I need to sigh.
M: So sigh.
L: Ok.
L:*sighs*
(April 28, 2019 - 8:36 pm)
- L: A red cow! Cat! What?
(April 28, 2019 - 8:45 pm)
Mariokart quotes:
"Dat Thwomp though-"
"Blue shells are my arch neme-people." (Any noun that ends in -is ends in -people in the plural I will fight you on this)
"SHWOOP SHWOOP SHWOOP SHWOOP THWOMP SHWOOP SHWOOP (etc.)"
"YoShI iS a GiRl hE lAyS eGgS gUyS mY lIfE iS cOmPlEtE"
"Freaking - STOP IT WITH THE SHELLS"
~
Pokemon quotes:
*Trying to imitate a Pokemon* "WHEOOWHEOO"
~
Super Smash Bros. Quotes:
"Shiek is not Zelda... Shiek... Is not... HOW"
"Kirby's stone move is my favorite drop kick."
~
I could list more, but I'll cease to bombard you for the moment.
(April 28, 2019 - 11:57 pm)