Poetry Club!

Chatterbox: Down to Earth

Poetry Club!

Poetry Club!

I'm pretty sure we already had one of these but I can't find the thread to resurrect it, so I'm making a new one. There is only one rule: be nice when you criticize (I don't even have to say that here) Anyways, here is a poem (I think it can be qualified as one!) of my own.

Do you ever look up at the sky and wonder

Why am I here?

What is my purpose on this earth?

Will I ever find my way?

The universe is so huge

and I've only seen a tiny piece of it.

There are a million drops of water in a fishtank 

Trillions upon trillions of tiny molecules floating around in the sea

More grains of sand than could ever be counted

An infinite number of stars; those detected and undiscovered.

When I look up into the endless depths of the sky

Or down into the never-ending abyss, as you might call it

I feel

Insignificant 

Trivial

Unimportant

And I know that I am

I'll live a short life compared to how long the universe will last

I will not do anything that will be remembered

But

When I look up at those stars

I hope

I dream

I wonder if

Life isn't so meaningless after all? 

PLEASE criticize! I am not too good at poetry, and would like some suggestions if you have them. Thank you!

 

 

submitted by Guess me if you want
(June 17, 2016 - 1:42 pm)

back to the Down to Earth

In the line: I'll live a short life compared to how long the universe will last

Maybe you should break that up a little? It's a pretty long line. 

Xiǎo tùzǐ says nozz. Nozzle? 

submitted by Mei-xue (May-shreh) , Fairyland
(June 17, 2016 - 3:17 pm)

Okay, thanks!

submitted by Guess me if you want
(June 25, 2016 - 10:09 pm)
submitted by Top-xue
(June 21, 2016 - 7:13 pm)

That was beautiful! I loved it!

I am not very good at poetry myself, but I did do this one that's ok....

Grateful~

I'm grateful for the frosty stars,

Twinkling in their silent beauty against a background of black velvet.

I'm grateful for the autum leaves, 

Who slowly die a colored death in the crisp, fall air. 

I'm grateful for the cheerful sun, 

For the cats, brother and sister, who bask in it,

For the plants that push their way through the warm soil to embrace it, 

For the trees that reach their green leaves up to feed on it. 

I'm grateful for the silent, pale moon

That reflects the beauty of the sun, 

and makes the ocean heave its white-capped breaths.

And I'm grateful for the words that allow me to capture the beauty of the world around me,

While sitting safe at home. 

submitted by Shadowmoon
(June 21, 2016 - 8:23 pm)

I love that, Shadowmoon! I'm going to post a poem on Friday or Saturday; my aunt&uncle are visiting right now with their baby. OMG he is so cute! 

submitted by Leafpool
(June 23, 2016 - 4:15 pm)

That was beautiful!

submitted by Mei-xue (May-shreh), Fairyland
(June 27, 2016 - 9:35 am)

I know a riddle poem.

 

A hill full a hill full,you cant catch a bowl full!

submitted by Emi S., age 9, VA
(June 26, 2016 - 11:53 am)

Here!

My passion is writing

I cannot live without it

All my thoughts turn into words

Flowing, leaping, dancing

My writing is my life

It is part of me

My heart and soul 

submitted by Leafpool
(June 27, 2016 - 1:44 pm)

Wow, you all are so good! Here's another one that I've written. Kind of long, but...

To the girl that I can never talk to

Hello.

You know my name. I know yours.

And that's all.

I want to talk to you

But there's a war going on inside my head

One second

I'm ready. I'm confident. I've got this.

Then I look at myself

Or remember

How much I've messed things up

How much I've embarrassed myself

When I've tried this before

So I don't talk to you

I can't

You probably think I'm stuck-up, rude

You compliment me on my work

But when I try to tell you thanks

It comes out as a hoarse whisper

And you don't hear

And I smack myself inside again

Because

There's a battle for every word

And right now

The good guys are losing

I'm sorry

You need a friend

Who will treat you as well as you treat others

I can't give you that

But you and I are much alike

So much that it's killing me

Why do I have to be this way?

People tell me to forget about what others think

To show my true colors

But my colors

Are ugly and dull

So I hide them

On the outside

I am a bright, sky-blue

Maybe a deep purple

I want to be a happy yellow

Like you

And if I could talk to you

You could show me how

So

I know I may seem conceited 

But I'm just terribly,

Terribly, socially awkward

And if you would talk to me first

It would make me

The happiest person in the world. 

 

 

 

submitted by Guess me if you want
(June 28, 2016 - 10:57 am)

That was so beautiful! I would love to join a poetry club! Here is one of mine.

 

Slave’s  Prayer

-Grace W.

we long for the day

when we can look at our hands

and know in our minds and souls

that they our ours

that we are free

we hope there will be a time

we can travel freely

without worries

that this family

will be torn apart

we wish, we pray

for a generation

where our grandchildren

“will not be judged by the color of their skin

but the goodness of their hearts”*

we seek the hour

when we have free will

to do as we wish

live life as we choose

and as we like it

we live for the day

when we are sovereign

from this terrible torture

and the heavy distress

upon our shoulders

amen

*adapted from MLK Jr

submitted by Grace W., age 10, Arvada, CO
(July 1, 2016 - 3:43 pm)

Wow, Grace, are you really 10 years old? That was beautiful!

submitted by Guess me if you want
(July 2, 2016 - 12:34 pm)

Leafpool, that was amazing! And for the life of me, I can't figure out the riddle! ;)

Thanks for saying you liked my poem. That means a lot. I just discovered the beauty of non-rhyming poetry, and I'd like to write more. :) 

 

submitted by Shadowmoon
(June 28, 2016 - 9:31 am)

Leafpool, I feel that way to. 

 

Here's my latest poem...

 

OLD PHOTOGRAPHS

 

The hair touching my shoulders

looks almost golden in the light 

 

like a soft fairy-touch, pale and thin

spiraling around the wide neckline

 

almost curly. Almost, but not quite.

I can’t believe I let it get so long

 

when for years I held my hand next

to my jawline, my fingers angular

 

yet bending against my hair line 

to feel the severed prickles. 

 

Two inches longer, it now curves

around my face like a graceful frame

 

darker, thicker, giving me the urge

to cut my past self’s tresses off

 

when I see old photographs

of a person who doesn’t look like me. 

submitted by Rose bud
(June 28, 2016 - 12:12 pm)

Everyone, I love your poetry! I haven't written much poetry in a few years, and I am not that great at it. But I love reading poetry, it is like a combination of a song and a picture in one. Later today I will write one, maybe. Or maybe I will share one of my old ones. Time will tell, I suppose.

submitted by Ashlee G., age 15, Pen in Hand
(June 30, 2016 - 1:24 pm)

I loveded those, guess me if you want and Rosebud! They were awesome! Here's one that I wrote about a year ago. 

 

Gold~

Gold

The color causing so much grief

The color making life seem brief

The color binding golden leaf

The color of our destinies

 

Over gold, men always lust

Only to have it fall to dust.

Over gold, men's hearts turn red

And human's passions daily fed. 

 

The rising sun gave gold to earth

Its sunbeams full 

of lovely mirth

It touches on the golden fields

And gives the grain its golden yields. 

 

It falls into the drifting leaves

And gives them gold genorously

Then falls onto the ground asleep 

The color of our destinies. 

 

submitted by Shadowmoon
(June 30, 2016 - 5:11 pm)
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