Poetry Club!
Chatterbox: Down to Earth
Poetry Club!
Poetry Club!
I'm pretty sure we already had one of these but I can't find the thread to resurrect it, so I'm making a new one. There is only one rule: be nice when you criticize (I don't even have to say that here) Anyways, here is a poem (I think it can be qualified as one!) of my own.
Do you ever look up at the sky and wonder
Why am I here?
What is my purpose on this earth?
Will I ever find my way?
The universe is so huge
and I've only seen a tiny piece of it.
There are a million drops of water in a fishtank
Trillions upon trillions of tiny molecules floating around in the sea
More grains of sand than could ever be counted
An infinite number of stars; those detected and undiscovered.
When I look up into the endless depths of the sky
Or down into the never-ending abyss, as you might call it
I feel
Insignificant
Trivial
Unimportant
And I know that I am
I'll live a short life compared to how long the universe will last
I will not do anything that will be remembered
But
When I look up at those stars
I hope
I dream
I wonder if
Life isn't so meaningless after all?
PLEASE criticize! I am not too good at poetry, and would like some suggestions if you have them. Thank you!
(June 17, 2016 - 1:42 pm)
In the line: I'll live a short life compared to how long the universe will last
Maybe you should break that up a little? It's a pretty long line.
Xiǎo tùzǐ says nozz. Nozzle?
(June 17, 2016 - 3:17 pm)
Okay, thanks!
(June 25, 2016 - 10:09 pm)
(June 21, 2016 - 7:13 pm)
That was beautiful! I loved it!
I am not very good at poetry myself, but I did do this one that's ok....
Grateful~
I'm grateful for the frosty stars,
Twinkling in their silent beauty against a background of black velvet.
I'm grateful for the autum leaves,
Who slowly die a colored death in the crisp, fall air.
I'm grateful for the cheerful sun,
For the cats, brother and sister, who bask in it,
For the plants that push their way through the warm soil to embrace it,
For the trees that reach their green leaves up to feed on it.
I'm grateful for the silent, pale moon
That reflects the beauty of the sun,
and makes the ocean heave its white-capped breaths.
And I'm grateful for the words that allow me to capture the beauty of the world around me,
While sitting safe at home.
(June 21, 2016 - 8:23 pm)
I love that, Shadowmoon! I'm going to post a poem on Friday or Saturday; my aunt&uncle are visiting right now with their baby. OMG he is so cute!
(June 23, 2016 - 4:15 pm)
That was beautiful!
(June 27, 2016 - 9:35 am)
I know a riddle poem.
A hill full a hill full,you cant catch a bowl full!
(June 26, 2016 - 11:53 am)
Here!
My passion is writing
I cannot live without it
All my thoughts turn into words
Flowing, leaping, dancing
My writing is my life
It is part of me
My heart and soul
(June 27, 2016 - 1:44 pm)
Wow, you all are so good! Here's another one that I've written. Kind of long, but...
To the girl that I can never talk to
Hello.
You know my name. I know yours.
And that's all.
I want to talk to you
But there's a war going on inside my head
One second
I'm ready. I'm confident. I've got this.
Then I look at myself
Or remember
How much I've messed things up
How much I've embarrassed myself
When I've tried this before
So I don't talk to you
I can't
You probably think I'm stuck-up, rude
You compliment me on my work
But when I try to tell you thanks
It comes out as a hoarse whisper
And you don't hear
And I smack myself inside again
Because
There's a battle for every word
And right now
The good guys are losing
I'm sorry
You need a friend
Who will treat you as well as you treat others
I can't give you that
But you and I are much alike
So much that it's killing me
Why do I have to be this way?
People tell me to forget about what others think
To show my true colors
But my colors
Are ugly and dull
So I hide them
On the outside
I am a bright, sky-blue
Maybe a deep purple
I want to be a happy yellow
Like you
And if I could talk to you
You could show me how
So
I know I may seem conceited
But I'm just terribly,
Terribly, socially awkward
And if you would talk to me first
It would make me
The happiest person in the world.
(June 28, 2016 - 10:57 am)
That was so beautiful! I would love to join a poetry club! Here is one of mine.
Slave’s Prayer
-Grace W.
we long for the day
when we can look at our hands
and know in our minds and souls
that they our ours
that we are free
we hope there will be a time
we can travel freely
without worries
that this family
will be torn apart
we wish, we pray
for a generation
where our grandchildren
“will not be judged by the color of their skin
but the goodness of their hearts”*
we seek the hour
when we have free will
to do as we wish
live life as we choose
and as we like it
we live for the day
when we are sovereign
from this terrible torture
and the heavy distress
upon our shoulders
amen
*adapted from MLK Jr
(July 1, 2016 - 3:43 pm)
Wow, Grace, are you really 10 years old? That was beautiful!
(July 2, 2016 - 12:34 pm)
Leafpool, that was amazing! And for the life of me, I can't figure out the riddle! ;)
Thanks for saying you liked my poem. That means a lot. I just discovered the beauty of non-rhyming poetry, and I'd like to write more. :)
(June 28, 2016 - 9:31 am)
Leafpool, I feel that way to.
Here's my latest poem...
OLD PHOTOGRAPHS
The hair touching my shoulders
looks almost golden in the light
like a soft fairy-touch, pale and thin
spiraling around the wide neckline
almost curly. Almost, but not quite.
I can’t believe I let it get so long
when for years I held my hand next
to my jawline, my fingers angular
yet bending against my hair line
to feel the severed prickles.
Two inches longer, it now curves
around my face like a graceful frame
darker, thicker, giving me the urge
to cut my past self’s tresses off
when I see old photographs
of a person who doesn’t look like me.
(June 28, 2016 - 12:12 pm)
Everyone, I love your poetry! I haven't written much poetry in a few years, and I am not that great at it. But I love reading poetry, it is like a combination of a song and a picture in one. Later today I will write one, maybe. Or maybe I will share one of my old ones. Time will tell, I suppose.
(June 30, 2016 - 1:24 pm)
I loveded those, guess me if you want and Rosebud! They were awesome! Here's one that I wrote about a year ago.
Gold~
Gold
The color causing so much grief
The color making life seem brief
The color binding golden leaf
The color of our destinies
Over gold, men always lust
Only to have it fall to dust.
Over gold, men's hearts turn red
And human's passions daily fed.
The rising sun gave gold to earth
Its sunbeams full
of lovely mirth
It touches on the golden fields
And gives the grain its golden yields.
It falls into the drifting leaves
And gives them gold genorously
Then falls onto the ground asleep
The color of our destinies.
(June 30, 2016 - 5:11 pm)