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Chatterbox: Pudding's Place
You are invited
You are invited to a Winter Ski Lodge Murder Mystery!
Who: Everyone is invited to join. One of you is a murderer, but which one?
What: This is a murder mystery. Every day, one person will die. Who is it? That's your job to figure out.
When: The game will begin on January 1 and end whenever it ends.
Where: The Ski Lodge. In other words, this page.
RSVP: I don't really care as long as you join sometime in December.
Various sundry rules and explanations:
-Each day I will write the story (probably in the morning or right after I get home if I have school). After that, you're welcome and encouraged to write your own view of the day.
-Big one: This isn't violent or gory.
-The motto: The funnier, the better.
-Basic geography does not apply. The Ski Lodge and Surrounding Territories more or less rewrites itself depending on how I want you guys to die.
-I don't decide who dies, so it's completely impartial. I pull everyone's names out of the Sugarbowl. The murderer comes out first (so I can keep track, really) and then I just draw a new name every day.
-Yes, the Sugarbowl is a Sugarbowl. I couldn't find a good hat the first time I wanted to do this and there is actually a skiing place in California called the Sugarbowl, so I thought, well, why not? It's more or less my Death Note.
-Pleeaaaassseee don't ask me to give you some long ridiculous name to put in the Sugarbowl. "Melody the Awesome Authority on all things Disney who is really Awesome" is so large, of course it's going to be pulled out right away.
-Like any good cartoon, logic and physics are overrated.
I hope you can join us.
-The Omnipotent Narrator
submitted by T.O.N.
(December 1, 2013 - 9:29 pm)
(December 1, 2013 - 9:29 pm)
NO! NO CUPCAKES!
I agree. It's either you or Red.
(January 20, 2014 - 11:23 pm)
SAFETY DANCE!
(January 22, 2014 - 5:12 pm)
First and foremost, I apologize. I've been wanting to kill a certain person a certain way for a long time and I feel really bad because the way refernces something I've strongly hinted people to look up but I'm more or less absoultely sure none of you did. I'm incorporating other things into the death, so if you pay attention in your history class, you should find this enjoyable.
Day 21
SC: I'm going to make French Toast for breakfast today.
Red: I don't trust you around bread products anymore. I think I'll make myself some oatmeal.
BHR: Sorry, SC, we're out of bread. I guess we'll all have to have oatmeal.
Tovah: *gasp* Let's have toaster pastries!
Grace: Can't we just bug the narrator to give us more bread?
Tovah: Does it work that way?
BHR: Well, when we ran out of laundry soap yesterday, I just yelled, "Yo, Narrator! I need more laundry soap!" and a box just popped out of air.
SC: Narrator? Hint hint? Bread? Please?
Grace: Is he even listening?
Tovah: I don't think so. Red, go demand bread from the narrator!
Red: Why me?
Tovah: Because he'll probably listen to you.
Red: *snort* Yeah, right. Oy! Narrator! You up there? Pay attention, will you?
What? Oh, hi. I stepped out for just a moment to y'know, look at at a little bit of this and that. A little Evillious this and Chronicles that...
Red: Yeah, that's great and all, but we're out of bread. The masses are demanding bread.
SC: "Masses"?
If they can't eat bread, let them eat brioche!
Red: Oh, boy.
Grace: I know where this is going.
Today looks boring, let's skip ahead.
BHR: Hey, wait, I an awesome speech! Don't skip my speech!
I thought it was boring, so I'm going to skip it. Shortly after lunch, the ski lodgers- what's this? What are you doing? Why are all the ghosts and the assasins here? There's even ghosts from past games!
Ima: We're declaring independence!
What?
Teresa: We'll storm your computer and give it viruses if you don't listen to our messages!
What's going on? Red, why are they revolting?
Red: Sire, it is not a revolt, it is a revolution.
Oh, great. I know where this is going! You'll all want my head off and that'll be the end!
Tovah: Well, I don't want to die! If you die, the game stops and we get to go home.
Maggie: We actually hadn't considered that, but...
Bounty and Watermelon: GUILLOTINE! GUILLOTINE! GUILLOTINE!
Gollum: Listen to our words first!
Teresa: The history of the present Narrator of the Great Ski Lodge Murder Mystery is a history of repeated injuries and deaths, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny on the Chatterboxers. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a candid forum.
Tiffany: He borrows characters from our stories without asking permission!
All: The Narrator is a tyrant!
SC: He forced me to clean up all that glitter!
All: The Narrator is a tyrant!
Melody: He makes fun of my singing, which is perfectly good, I tell you! Perfectly good! Stop laughing, Blu!
All: The Narrator is a tyrant!
Blue Fairy: He messed up the gender of my teddy bear!
I think you know what goes on this line. Everybody calls me a tyrant and this will continue on until people are done having their complaints issued.
Theo: He made me scared of rabbits!
Maggie: He kept on having me bake cookies!
Skyler: He made me faint every couple of days! That's bad for my health!
BHR: He changed all of our personalities! The only one who isn't changed is Red, and that's because Red writes his own lines!
Blackberry: He made Red flirt with- oh, wait, you did that yourself? Red, you're going to get it!
Lizzy: He doesn't even keep the personalities consistent from lodge to lodge or sometimes day to day!
Admin: He has frequent typos! What? Can't I join in the mob?
JLM: He made me be stabbed everyday!
Agent E.W.: He hasn't paid us yet!
Agent Alpacachan: He's a big fat meanie butthead! And a tyrant!
Jeez, tell me how you really feel, why don't you? Hold on a minute, please, while I go do something. Stab Jem Louise Margaret or something while you wait. Hello? ACME Fourth Walls? I'd like to report a break in my fourth wall and hopefully get that fixed? I have a warranty.
ACME Fourth Walls: What's the break look like?
Well, my characters seem to be... revolting. Revolutionizing, even. They're mobbing me, calling me a tyrant, and they want to guillotine me.
ACME Fourth Walls: Sorry, we can't help you there. We can repair broken fourth walls, but your fourth wall wasn't so much broken as supernovaed, vaporized, and then sucked up with a shop vac. Good day, sir. (The joke here, of course, is that no telephone service is ever that polite.)
Well, this is a pickle. To quote Jarjar Binks, meesa gonna die. red? What are you doing here? Have you come to say your goodbyes? I must tell you something, before I go. In actuality, Sakura is-
Red: That's not why I'm here.
A MAN! What? What are you here for, then?
Sakura: I am not a man! Where did that come from?
Red: I have a plan. Here, I'll lend you my clothes. Wear them and immediatly start escaping. We'll be allright. We're the same person, after all. Nobody will be able to tell the difference.
Despite the fact that you're, oh, half a foot taller and have different colored hair and eyes, I'm sure nobody will be able to tell the difference at all. Oh, well. I don't want to die, so escape I will do! Adios, amigos!
Red: I didn't know he could run that fast. And now I have to pretend to be the narrator. This will be weird. Hello, great CBers! I am back! I had to, uh, powder my nose for a moment. Yes. That sounds right.
Ivy: Red, what are you doing?
Red: I'm not Red! I'm the narrator! You know, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and, uh, Evillious Chronicles! That's me!
Some random girl in the crowd: I say we behead him anyway, as punishment for that bad acting.
And at precisely three o'clock, Red was beheaded.
S.E.: Any last words, Red?
Red: Oh, it's time for tea.
Gilraen: What?
*kathunk*
Well, that was strange, to say the least. So, in summation-
The doctor: I hear someone narrating!
Corina: CHARGE!!!
-I'm running for my life! Rest in peace, Red. Rest in peace.
(January 21, 2014 - 9:28 am)
Ha. SC, you're the murderer, most likely.
(January 21, 2014 - 12:56 pm)
Does this mean I get to pick the song?
(January 21, 2014 - 3:25 pm)
Uh, I guess? It's kind of hard to write songs every day, but I can try if you really want one.
(January 21, 2014 - 8:33 pm)
Oh I don't really care one way or the other, especially with it getting so close to the end. I was just wonderin'.
(January 22, 2014 - 1:34 pm)
Actually, I think you've got my personality pretty much down. I was waiting for a "Let them eat cake!" line but I guess all I got was "Let them eat brioche!". I liked this one and I did get *most* of the references. I'm pretty sure.
(January 21, 2014 - 1:02 pm)
The ones you didn't get most likely came from two songs called Daughter of Evil and Servant of Evil. They're pretty cool if you look them up. There's a chorus centred around brioche in Servant of Evil that makes the character called the Daughter of Evil often represented by brioche. When I was planning this out a while ago, I thought I was really clever to have me, representing her, say, "Let them eat brioche!". Then I found out she actually says that in a novel. Well, so much for originality.
(January 21, 2014 - 8:37 pm)
We just learned about the Reign of Terror in social studies. ...was the thing you wanted us to look up the Evillious Chronicles???
(January 21, 2014 - 1:52 pm)
“...remember the Ghosts, and be more generous and
favorable to them than your ancestors. Do not put such unlimited power
into the hands of the Narrator. Remember all Narrators would be tyrants if
they could. If particular care and attention is not paid to the Ghosts
we are determined to foment a Rebellion, and will not hold ourselves
bound by any Laws in which we have no voice, or Representation.”
(January 21, 2014 - 6:10 pm)
Really, narrators are tyrants. They force their characters to do anything the narrator wants them to. I'll grant you your freedom... in a couple of days.
Captcha says heee. That is some creepy laughter, captcha.
(January 22, 2014 - 10:10 am)
Haha, no, don't look up the whole thing! I only referenced two fairly popular songs called "Daughter of Evil" and "Servant of Evil" and they're pretty cool, if you want to look them up. If they sound pretty bad, that's because they're two of the artist's very first songs. He gets much better later.
(January 21, 2014 - 8:40 pm)
I think this is my favorite day, partially because I love history, partially because I love laughing, and partially because I love yelling "GUILLOTINE!".
(January 21, 2014 - 5:52 pm)
In history class, we got to guillotine various members of the class (we used grapes in place of heads) and whenever anyone important was about to be guillotined we'd pound on the desks and chant, "GUILLOTINE! GUILLOTINE! GUILLOTINE!" Some kids from other claseses even came to watch, we were so loud.
(January 22, 2014 - 10:08 am)