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Three prisons of
Three prisons of night
In the three cages of night, three treasures awaite the unseen eyes. The fourth is hidden in the lair of dark. Only the four as one can defeat the one of Evil. And only the four chosen can make four one. But be warned, a fith can destroy all four.
Okay so this RP is about the Sun dragon and the Night dragon. But, here is where the tables turn. The Night dragon is all good, and the Sun dragon is evil. They are the two rulers of the Land of three tribes. This prophecy predicts that four chosen will go on a quest through the three prisons to find all three of the treasurs. Then they will venture to the lair of evil and retreave the fourth, to save all the land.
The prisions are well, prisions to keep the evils contained. They are seperate walls of solid obsidain lined in a row. There is one for each of the tribes. The jungle tribe, the desert tribe, and the sea tribe. Each has a gardain who have been instructed to keep all inside, and trespassers will be killed. No one knows what the gardains are, and lived to tell the tale.
The four treasurs are:
The Ruby elephant of the jungle.
The Jade cat of the desert.
The amythist dolphin of the sea.
The opal wolf of the jungle.
Either the Ruby elephant or Opal wolf are in the Sun dragons lair.
You can be:
one of the four
a guardian or a guard for either of the kings or tribes
can be part of the dragons, which is like royalty, and can live with either of the kings
one of the imprizoned
one of the desert tribe, which is any animals that live in a desert
one of the jungle tribe, which is any animals that live in jungles or forests
one of the sea tribe, which is any animals that live in water
i will be the Sun dragon and the Night dragon
you must fill out this sheet:
Name:
Location:
Tribe/gardain of which tribe:
Imprizoned?:
one of the four:
animal:
personality:
appearance:
background:
Name: Sun dragon
Location: The castle of gold
Tribe: the tribe of royalty
Imprizoned?: no. Though my brother makes it seem like it
one of the four: ha! The four will die
animal: dragon
personallity: stoic. Evil. What else is there to say?
appearance: long gold wings, a lashing spiked tail. Golden scales and emerald green eyes. Silver claws and white horns and spikes.
Background: turned evil when parents chose Night dragon to rule the tribes instead of him. So he stole a chunk of the royals land for all dragons, and slowly started taking the tribes by force.
Name: Night dragon
Location: castle of royalty
Tribe: the tribe of royalty
Imprizoned?: if the four don't succeed, maybe one day
one of the four: i wish them luck
animal: dragon
personality: wise beyond his years, caring and compationate. Alltogeather good
Apperance: long, black as midnight wings. Black scales dotted with white scales, seemingly like the night filled with stars. Silver talons and spikes and gray horns. Red eyes.
Background: was chosen to be the king, driving Sun dragon evil. He ran away and stole some of the land to make a new castle, is slowly convincing the dragons to join him, and slowly taking over the tribes. I have recently seen a vision, of the four who will save us....
submitted by Claaws
(August 10, 2016 - 11:43 pm)
(August 10, 2016 - 11:43 pm)
Hey Claaws, remember me? Ronan?
Name: Mathatias (said math-a-tee-as)
Tribe/guardain of which tribe: None. I go from place to place, never staying long.
Imprisoned?: No. At least not physically.
One of the four: No. I don't care.
Animal: Wolf.
Personality: Solitary, he trusts no one.
Appearance: A large midnight colored wolf with a white spot around one eye.
Background: When I was very young, I woke one day to find my parents dead. I have trusted no one since, and my life goal is to find out who killed them.
(August 15, 2016 - 11:47 am)
No offense meant, but I think the dragon characters are rather undeveloped. What was Sun dragon like before he turned evil? It would make no sense for him to do a full 180 just because he didn't get the power position. And also, "Evil" or "Good" in a personality all by itself makes for a one-dimensional character. Night Dragon needs flaws. Sun dragon needs good qualities. Also, what is the extent of their powers? It's never said what powers they have and where they stop.
I do like the premise, but I think your characters should be more developed – just "Oh this guy is evil" and "Oh this guy is good." Tell me MORE! No one is just good or just evil.
*looks at rest of thread* Also, a similar problem exists with other character personalities. For instance, Brookeira's personality– "Wise, kind, smart." (Brookeira is not the only one with this problem, though, don't think I'm saying yours is the worst Brook! It was the first I saw.) Personality tip: If you can describe it in a sentence or less, it's almost always not fleshed out enough. Also, again, remember, FLAWS. CHARACTER FLAWS. And I don't mean just power limitations– personality flaws are very important and a major part of an interesting character.
Oh, and a minor pet peeve, Claaws– you spelled "imprisoned", "prison" and "guardian" wrong. *I'm just nitpicking now.*
Please don't think I'm hating on your characters. I'm only trying to help. I'm not a super pro experienced awesome writer, either, think of this comment as a peer review.
Rereading the post, I'm actually pretty redundant.
(August 15, 2016 - 5:50 pm)
When I first joined the CB, we generally didn't write much about our personalities because we wanted them to develop. I get writing a long personality so others can write you better, but I don't do that. I want my character to develop on her own.
(August 15, 2016 - 8:16 pm)
I understand that. My counterargument is simply that I can't understand how you can develop a personality that doesn't exist. Also, no one has flat personality, ever. People usually have a complex personality that develops into a different complex personality.
(August 16, 2016 - 5:40 pm)
Oh hey Ronan!
Also we just need one more of the four to start, the dragon.
Also the dragon characturs will develop more through the story, and that background there for the treasures gave a little bit more to the story.
(August 16, 2016 - 12:57 pm)
Who we have so far:
Gardains:
Krta Gleon, sea dragon, gaurdain of the Sea tribe prision (since humans are not part of the tribes, can you just be a Sea dragon? Also all gardains are gardains for the prisions, or one of the kings.)
The four:
Cleo Hartsworth, dolphin, sea tribe (since there is alot of travling, maybe you could be something that walks too? Ex: alligator, crocodile, Hippo, seal, otter, sea turtle, turtle, one of those mud fish things, ect)
Eclipse, winged fox, desert tribe
Paige, ?, jungle tribe (if you dont want to be a part of the jungle tribe, the royals tribe is open too)
Imprisoned:
Tiger, ocelot, jungle tribe
Tribes:
Marvelous, dragon, royal tribe
Mathatias, wolf, used to be part of the Mountain tribe (is that okay with you because wolves are from the mountain tribe....but the mountain tribe sied all but a few)
(August 16, 2016 - 1:20 pm)
Hmm....how about a wolf?
(August 16, 2016 - 9:24 pm)
Sure!
(August 17, 2016 - 4:56 am)
Okay, Cleo will be a gold colored otter.
(August 17, 2016 - 6:30 am)
Can I join?
(August 17, 2016 - 9:08 am)
If so can I be a dragon??
(August 17, 2016 - 9:21 am)
Yes anyone can join you dont have to ask (also the dragon one of the four is still open if u want it)
Sounds good everyone!!!! But Inktail wolves r from the mountain tribe, how about something like um, an elephant a tiger a ocelot a jaguar a taipar gorilla a monkey a poison dart frog a fox a sloth......ect
(August 17, 2016 - 12:57 pm)
YAY!!! Thankyou sooo much! Ok I will be one of the four...here is what I look like
(August 17, 2016 - 7:07 pm)
But I might have too leave the RP on this Saturday sooooo....I will tell you on Friday!
(August 17, 2016 - 7:12 pm)
Hey if you do join please post a charrie sheet!!!!!
Guys we can start, if Tuxedo kitten wants to join she can but for now we will start and if u don't then someone else can be the fourth.
(August 18, 2016 - 9:59 pm)