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Fictional Problems III!!!
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Fictional Problems III!!!
Fictional Problems III!!!
I did a couple of these a while back, and, if I do say so myself, they were fairly popular. For those of you who weren't around then, Fictional Problems is basically just making up insane fiascos which others will advise us upon. For example:
Person One:
Help! My helicopter broke down on the top of Mount Fuji, and all I have for company are a swarm of angry groundhogs! Of course, they have consumed nearly all my sustenance; alas! all I have is a single chocolate chip cookie. SOS!
Person Two:
You should craft a sled from the helicopter, tame the groundhogs, and tie the cookie to a string which you will proceed to tie to a stick. Then, get the groundhogs hitched up to the sled, and encourage them to run by holding the cookie out in front of them. Travel, by means of the groundhog-powered sled, to the nearest village. Hope this helps!
So yeah, randomness is the name of the game on this thread. Have fun!
submitted by The Chocabookaholic, age 12
(October 7, 2014 - 3:21 pm)
(October 7, 2014 - 3:21 pm)
HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm stuck on a never-ending thorn bush and all I have is an apple and a chicken leg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(October 16, 2014 - 10:59 pm)
I assume the chicken leg is a cooked drumstick. So, eat the drumstick and poke the apple onto the top of the bone. Then, hold it in the air and the smell will attract a hippopotamus. Feed it the apple and it will tear the bush away from you and let you ride on it's back until you reach wherever you are going. You must give the hippo the bone, and then back a away slowly.
Help! I am being held hostage by several angry rhinos! I have a light saber and l am covered in peanut oil! I also have a few hostage mice who I feed with bits of blue cheese.
(October 17, 2014 - 10:09 am)
Have the mice lick the peanut oil off you. Then, cut trees down with the light saber, build a cart, and tie the blue cheese to the wire you will magically find in your back left pocket (which may not be there), and tie that to a stick, hold it in front of the mice for insensitive.
Heeelp, the BLASTER went haywire on me in Squeak's house (but she will soon have it will soon be blown up, not that I really care but...) she gonna KILL me! I gonna die, and all I have are my PJs!
HUEUEUELULUPPUP
(October 21, 2014 - 9:27 am)
If you are calling me a she, I'm a boy. Not a girl.
(November 5, 2014 - 7:37 pm)
No, no, no, no. I know you are a boy. I was talkin' 'bout El Blaster!
(November 6, 2014 - 9:12 am)
(October 19, 2014 - 7:28 pm)
TOP TOP TOP TOP TOP
(October 21, 2014 - 6:47 am)
TOP.
(October 25, 2014 - 10:44 am)
TOP.
(October 25, 2014 - 10:44 am)
meow
(October 25, 2014 - 10:46 am)
Help! I'm tied to the back of a giant, flying, man-eating Sheep made of pollen!!! (I'm allergic to pollen by the way. It makes me have a bloody nose.) All I have is the rope that's tieing me to the sheep and an issue of Cricket magsiene!!! HELP!!!!
P.S.- I'm going to be eaten by the sheep as soon as he lands, which is in about fifteen minutes.
(November 2, 2014 - 11:28 pm)
Give the issue to the sheep, who will be interested in it long enough for you to lower yourself down with the rope and escape.
Help!! I was trying to get to the ice queen's palace, but now I'm being pursued by chupacabra bunnies and all I have is a carrot, yarn, and a piece of wood!!
(November 5, 2014 - 4:27 pm)
Use your Queen's Ice Mage powers to toss the carrot into another dimension. The chupacabra bunnies will chase after it. Then use the yarn, the wood, and a spell to make things magnetic to create a makeshift compass. Follow the compass north, and you'll find the Queen's palace eventually. It's at the North Pole.
I need help ASAP!!!!! I was visiting the zoo when it closed randomly and I got locked into the Australia exhibit! All I have are eight plush kangaroos, a suitcase full of soft-boiled eggs, and a very friendly cuttlefish!!!!!!!!!!!! How do I escape?
(November 5, 2014 - 8:59 pm)
A Curious Dragon: empty the suitcase, and proceed to make a tower/heap of sorts out of the plush kangaroos and the suitcase along the enclosure's wall. Ask the cuttlefish to climb the tower with some soft boiled eggs, then climb up after him carrying the rest. After you have thrown the eggs over the side of the wall, jump onto them. Then make your way through the zoo 'til you get to the front gate, which fortunately has horizonal bars, so you can climb it with ease.
Please help!! Someone put me in an air balloon last night while I was sleeping, and all I have is a sleeping bag with a kitten in it and a starfruit!!!
(November 6, 2014 - 1:44 pm)
Chocabookaholic: throw the starfruit up so the kitten will try to catch it, and therefore, slice the HAB's ropes. you will fall. use the sleeping bag as padding. good luck!!
Help!! I am trapped inside a very nasty video game, which is currently being punched by a very angry person failing at it. I'm about to be crushed by the HAND OF EVIL!!!! Oh no... now the Masked Piester is trying to help so... ALL I HAVE IS A WEIRD SUPERHERO COSTUME AND MANY PIES!! HELP!!
(November 6, 2014 - 9:43 pm)