These are hilarious!

-- That time when I somersaulted into the Christmas tree

-- That time when I almost got into a stranger's car because it looked just like ours.

-- That time when I had to go to the doctor because I got a BB stuck up my nose.

-- That time when I forgot to put my shoes on during a scene for a show and was walking around in my socks.

-- That time when I almost drowned because I slipped on a dinosaur footprint

Oh, man, I love these! Everyone has such funny stories. xD

—— 

- That time when my family got free line-skip passes at an amusement park

- That time when my aunt gave me $20 in two-dollar bills

- That time when I saved a baby goat from strangulation

- That time an alpaca spat in my face

- That time when my friend tried to make a zip line out of the window on the third story of her house, fell off, and broke her leg in three places

- That time when she jumped out of the same window AGAIN to prove she could do it without getting hurt and broke her other leg

- That time when my hair caught on fire

- That time when my little cousin put underwear on her head and ran around the house pretending to be The Flash

- That time when I drove a riverboat

- That time when my friend fell off a flagpole 

- That time when I fell off a golf cart

- That time when I tie-dyed my sneakers

- That time when I put salt in my tea

- That time when my cousin got zapped by an electric flyswatter 

- That time when my friend and I made a drink out of every liquid we could find in this all-you-can-eat-buffet, and when a lady caught us dumping Sriracha into a cup and asked us what we were doing he said, "I like my soda extra spicy", and we were kicked out of the cafeteria

- That time when I tripped over a dog

- That time when my brother ran into a telephone pole on his bike 

~That time when I touched the electric fence

~That time when I stepped on a slug

~That time when we sold half the chickens in under five minutes (this was yesterday--there were almost 40 chickens)

~That time when I found a diamond on the concrete sidewalk leading up to our porch steps--the one our aunt had lost from her wedding ring half a year prior

~That time when I nearly fainted at a birthday party

~That time when I walked out of the store with an unpaid-for stuffed dog (this was before I knew about the concept of money--the dog was shortly returned)

~That time when our teacher told us to fake laugh and I ended up giggling my head off

~That time when I sent a chicken ice-skating

~That time when we went sledding in a kiddie pool

~That time when someone tried to steal the lawnmower

These are so funny! Great idea, Shoshannah!

~That time when I spilled chocolate syrup on my dog*

~That time when me and two of my friends may have managed to signal a hot air balloon using a tennis ball

~That time when I put two tablespoons of salt in some bread dough instead of two teaspoons**

~That time when a cast iron skillet was left on the burner and caught fire

~That time when my dad rode on his bike past my friend's house and saw water pouring out of their kitchen window***

*My dog was fine, we cleaned it off

**The bread was horrible. Always read carefully.

***Long story, but my friends weren't home and they were having their kitchen remodeled.

I love these! Mine probably won't be as great:

-That time when I ran our quad into a tree and made my dad say some not-so-nice words.

-That time when my brother was chasing me around the yard on our bicycle and turned so sharp he fell over. 

-That time when I shattered the windsheild of my brothers truck with a gun.*

-That time when my sister and I were riding our pony bareback across our field and we fell off. 

-That time when we snuck out of our cabins (at a camp) and played glow-in-the-dark volleyball even though it was lights out. 

-That time when I told my friends to take a shortcut with me and we ended up getting slightly lost and probably tresspassed.**

-That time when I almost drove my brother and dad off of a cliff and succeeded in jack-knifing the tralier while I was at it.***

-That time when we watered our cows. 

*At first he thought I had done it with my head, but then he realized it was with the gun.

**We didn't get caught though!

***Luckily, I was able to stop in time. 

-That time when I climbed the statue of Robert E. Lee and freaked out my friends.

-That time when my best friend and I decided to go into the backyard and howl like wolves.

-That time when there wasn't enough room in my dad's car for everybody, so we took turns riding in the trunk.

-That time when my friends and I decided to make cookie batter at 1:00 in the morning during a sleepover without permission, then eat it all (without baking it).

-That time when my friend thought I was stuck in a recycling bin so he tipped me over and I screamed, then two other friends wouldn't stop laughing. (I wasn't even stuck!)

-That time when my brother, cousin, grandmother, and I decided to chicken fight in the pool, with my grandmother on my brother's shoulders and my cousin on mine. My cousin and I lost!

-That time when my classmates deserted me in the shark room at the Baltimore Aquarium because of some baseball player.

-That time when my friend serenaded an orangutan at the zoo.

-That time when I adopted a dinosaur and was forced to share custody of him until we found the owner. 

That time when...

- I hid in the cupboard under the sink in a bathroom while playing hide and go seek, and some dude came in to use the restroom.*

- I saw someone I thought I knew in Subway, yelled out his name... and it was a completely different person.

- I nearly drowned at my sister's fourth birthday party.

- I went Christmas caroling in my swimsuit.**

- I constantly wore underwear on my head.***

-I wore my swim goggles to the ice cream parlor.  

- I nearly fainted when trying to blow my nose.

- I stood in the middle of the kiddie pool where kids were dumping cup fulls of water at VBS. 

- I had a sneeze attack in the middle of my child ensemble's solo during Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.****

- I wrote the titles of all the Hamilton songs in different fonts in my friend's yearbook.

- I started cracking up in the middle of my choir camp concert. 

- The entire fourth grade stayed out half an hour too long for recess because of some... excessive drama. 

- On the SECOND TO LAST day of school, I went to the wrong class period. *****

*Luckily, he didn't find me.

**In summer, rest assured.

***I was three.  

****My mom has this on video. You can hear people laughing at me.  

*****WHY IS LIFE SO HARD!? 

~That time when I chased my friend's brother over rooftops and through their yard and house and car, in my swimsuit while dripping wet, all because of water balloons.

~That time when I taught my friend to do a flip on the trampoline, and she did it the next day on hard ground without thinking.*

~That time when my friends and I stayed up until six in the morning at a sleepover party.

~That time when I made myself an outdoor bathroom out of a refrigerator box.**

~That time when my friend and I decided to spend the night in our school's attic, fully prepared with sleeping bags and blankets.***

~That time when that same friend and I built a fortress in the woods outside that same school.****

~That time when I brought a homemade 'party in a box' to that school.

~~~~~~

* She hit her head, but she was fine.

** I was seven.

*** Again, I was seven. It was a tiny school, and so the attic was really run down and the ceiling was low and I wouldn't even call it attic. It was more of a crawl space, one of those with stuffing sticking out of the ceiling.

**** I was also seven, at that tiny school.

If you want to know the stories behind these, I'd love to tell them! 

My family came to town...so I have a lot more to add...

I am still having so much fun reading and re-reading these! :D 

~That time when my cousins and I skipped through Longwood Gardens (a big beautiful garden that is totally AWESOME) singing "We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz." 

~That time when my cousin started to propose to me in the gift shop as a joke.

~That time when my aunt rode down an elevator once and up it TWICE on a scooter while screaming and woke up the old folks. 

~That time when my cousin, my sister, and I played Marco Polo in the auditorium of the old folks home when it was dark. 

~That time when my cousin and my sister decided to play a prank on me and ran away WHILE playing Marco Polo (funny, but annoying)

~That time when I had to sit between my cousins while the fought in the car. 

~That time when I freaked out when my cousin jumped out at me and everyone laughed. 

~That time when I hit my head in the kids garden at Longwood Gardens because the archways are so low. 

~That time when my cousins, my sister, and I were playing Catch Fraze and nobody knew what a Spa day was. 

~That time when my cousin told me the crackers I was eating at the time expired before either of us were born...and I believed him.

~That time when my Dad dropped ice on my Grandma's nice clean floor and we had to clean it up with a stick and half a dust pan because my Grandma wasn't home at the time and we didn't know where she kept anything.

~That time when my aunt embarrassed my cousins and I to no end.

~That time when my Grandma lost her scooter.

~That time when my cousins and I played hide and seek in a tree house that wasn't even ours.

~That time when my Aunt stated that the burning birthday candles were hot in the middle of singing happy birthday and no one could finish the song because we were laughing so hard. 

You can see that my cousins and I are totally crazy...if you want I'd love to tell you the stories behind these! 

Your aunt and grandma sound pretty lively, too!

Admin