Chatterbox: In This Month's Issue

Hello everybody!

Quarintine may suck sometimes, but here’s one advantage: you can be right on time for the

MONTHLY CHECK-UP!

**[Breathes]-

*Say one pun and I’ll put you in a sentence with the word of the day: defenestration.

**Ooooky doky.

Despite Zeke’s lack of humor-

*hey.

We had a lot of material for this joke section, so make sure you don’t read that after dark! (If this isn’t posted at midnight…) Additionally, the advice column has a bunch of creative ideas for celebrating soldiers, all from our very own viewers. The LMWAY also has this creative streak, as do the Locations and - oh come ON LET’S JUST GET INTO THIS MCU!

*and you call ME insane...well, crack out your calendar, because we’re starting off with the

IMPORTANT DATES!

May 1 - May Day! (Read up on this holdiay if you don’t know it - the origins are AWESOME!)

May 2 - Brothers and Sisters Day! 

May 3 - World Laugh Day (M.M)

May 4 - May the Fourth be with you! (M.M and Dolphin) 

May 5 - Cinco de Mayo (M.M) AND Cinco de Mayo Holiday Hunger Games!

May 6 - Beverage Day

May 7 - World Athletics Day (M.M)

May 8 - World Red Cross Day

May 9 - Name Yourself Day (Alex)

May 10 - Mother’s Day (M.M), the Mother’s Day HHG, AND Model Car Day (Strawberri)!

May 11 - Eat What You Want Day (Alex)

May 12 - World Nurses Day (M.M)

May 13 - National Receptionist Day

May 14 - Dance Like a Chicken Day

May 15 - International Day of Family (M.M) AND the end of quarantine in Vermont (Strawberri)

May 16 - Wear Purple for Peace Day

May 17 - National Pack Rat Day

May 18 - National Museum Day (M.M), Mt. St. Helen’s Day AND Dolphin’s Thirteenth Birthday! (Dolphin)

May 19 - Mug with Your Name Day (Strawberri)

May 20 - Eliza Doolittle Day (PygmyOwl)

May 21 - National Day for Anti-Terrorisim (M.M)

May 22 - International Day for Biological Diversity (M.M)

May 23 - International Jazz Day

May 24 - National Escargot Day

May 25 - Memorial Day (M.M) AND the Memorial Day HHG!

May 26 - Sally Ride Day

May 27 - Children’s Day in Nigeria

May 28 - National Hamburger Day

May 29 - Learn About Composting Day

May 30 - Lord of the Rings Day (Strawberri)

May 31: Anti-Tobacco Day (M.M)

**OH MY GOSH ESCARGOOOTTT

*Sharimara loves escargot. You should tell her about this.

Eh, maybe later. Anyway - 

*Add that to the list, Sammy.

Wait, what? What? What list.

***[Ahem] Last week, Nelina asked you to add her on ClipSnip. You still haven’t done so.

Well -

***Additionally, you still need to get Rapshider’s phone number and not just his ClipSnip account.

I - 

*** A group chat with Bie, Boonoo, Birezi, and Prehherea, another with Juma, Keshi, and Shakawatha, and one more with Ziataaman and Ziakarar, the twins, have not been replied to in a week.

Ehhh - 

*Whoa, look at the time! It’s about time for 

THE LMWAY!

(Last Month We Asked You)

Last Month We Asked You: What would you hide inside eggs instead of candy and money?

 Dolphin said: I would host a pool party at wild waves with all the junk food you can eat, and donate the rest to soldiers. Ways to honor soldiers: well, I play the violin, so maybe make an online video of the Star-Spangled Banner. Or donate to organizations that support soldiers and veterans. And cards!

Luna-Starr said: have the best neighborhood street party ever. There'll be hot dogs and burgers, lemonade in dixie cups. sparklers and tiny flags. People could sit in lawn chairs and talk and remember all of our brave military personnel. Kids could catch fireflies and play with those little pop-its you have on 4th of July. Overall it would be a really good (and rather inexpensive) time.

Alex said: Make the best... most awesomenest.. PARTY TO HONOR THE SOLDIERS EVER!!!

ok sorry that was a little overboard...

Majestic Mary said: Well, assuming we are no longer in quarantine... I would go to the pool, because my pool opens on Memorial Day, and I would buy pizza for the ENTIRE pool. I would also buy more soda for the soda toss, so there would be less face-kicking and underwater fighting for a single can of off-brand soda. Then I would buy everyone ice cream, and then, after the pool closed, some of my friends would come home with me and we would have a huge party with all the most unnecessary things.

Strawberri said: I'd put flags up all over my house, order potato chips (original, barbaque, sour cream and onion, etc) hire a live band to play outside my house, sitting 6 feet apart, give 200$ to the wounded warrior project, get 40 hot dogs, 50 hamburgers and buns for both things, give anything left to the WW project

Summer said:  Let's do a traditional barbecue! Hot dogs, hamburgers, veggie burgers, all the condiments, and, if there's any cash left over, maybe some lawn games. Like hula hoops and stuff.

***Zulgeteb could be asking you about the homework, you still haven’t responded to Zulbajin even though no one in your family has trouble sleeping, Tzane asked you about Seshi that one time so she could be asking you again - 

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHh

MAY JOKES!

Q: What do you call a female horse after dark?

A: A nightmare!

(Emekittycon K)

Why do pilots hate May?

Because of May Day!

Why are the military the best secret keepers?

They’ll never tell a soul-dier!

Why should you play Bohemian Rhapsody on Mother’s Day?

MAMAAAAAAAAA, oooo-o-o-ooh,

What do you call the grave of the unknown soldier’s mother?

A military mom-ument!

What do you say after you compliment a soldier?

I hope that major day!

  

 

***Nuenvan’s birthday was three months ago and you wished him happy birthday on SnipClip but what if you didn’t do enough - 

SAMMY! SHUT UP!

***Rude.

*No, she’s right. All you’re doing is pointing out her flaws, but she’s still done many - 

**No, she’s evil now.

*What?

**She’s a monster. A shapeshifter. A swamp demon.

*...it’s times like these I regret that humans were gifted with emotions.

Let’s move on, shall we! 

HONORING THE SOLDIERS WHILE IN QUARANTINE!

To honor the soldiers while in quarantine, make cards! If you have a family member in the military, send it to them, and they will definitely appreciate it. You can also make a video thanking the soldiers and post it online - never underestimate the power of social media, especially in these trying times!

(Submitted my Majestic Mary)

Well... Let's see.. you could call them and thank them.

(Submitted by Alex)

You can honor our soldiers by posting a video thanking them on social media, or if you can't do that, you can hang up a poster thanking them in your window!

(Submitted by Luna-Starr)

Well, if you know any personally, a thank you letter would work. Something to let them know their country appreciates them. If you are honoring people who have passed away, you don't have to do that much. A silent thought thinking about what they have done for your country can be enough. If you want, you can also be crafty with it, creating pictures of the soldiers in battle or something else, as long as its not disrespectful.

(Submitted by Dusk S.)

Make a Zoom party for them. And send flowers to everyone. Daffodils represent respect.

(Submitted by PygmyOwl)

**Itqanne once called you up thirty times in the same day while you were eating dinner and you didn’t call him back - 

***Alnotassa once sent you a meme and you haven’t sent one back for a month, which is a three on the payback scale - 

**Basically we’re saying that you’re the worst person to ever walk the earth.

I am LEAVINNNNGGGGG!

*Wonder what she’ll do in the conviently placed garage that will probably never be mentioned again and whose existence will most likely be contradictd?

***Beats me. Anyway...

LOCATION OF THE MONTH!

In third place, we have…

OUTSIDE, DISOBEYING QUARANTINE!

Why: I am the g r em l i n spreading c or o n a ry 

Although this is hilarious, it’s a bad message to send!

In second place, we have…

IN BLOOM!

Why:  I love the imagery on this! I just love it! And hopefully we DO get some flowers besides dandelions this May!

In first place, we have…

 DANCING AROUND A MAY POLE!

Why: *clap* MORE *clap* PEOPLE *clap* NEED *clap*

TO *clap* KNOW  *clap* ABOUT *clap* THIS *clap* AWESOME *clap* HOLIDAY

 

**MAY MCU IS MADA!

*Make sure to comment for the next MCU!

Here’s what we’ll accept:

June jokes 

Location of the Month

The funniest thing your father has ever done! (Stepfathers work as well!)

LMWAY (Here is a beach ball the size of a globe. Do something AMAZING with it?)

CBer awards!

Important dates!

*Additionally, if you have any ideas for future advice columns or LMWAYs, PLEASE tell us! 

**We’re always accepting new ideas, because making the MCU is harder than it seems!

If yall have any suggestions, make sure to comment them! We appreciate it more than we can say!

*Huh, Ella still hasn’t come back from the convient...whatever I said.

**Oh well, I suppose we’ll never find - ELLA WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT TABLET?

I’M GOING TO PLAY THE 2018 REWIND - 

*gAsP

anD Nown! oNe! DCAND!! STSOP! 1 MEM!1111!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAHAAHh1HHH!AHHAH!HH!!H!HHAHAH!HWHAAHAHAH

Till the next MCU,

Floof Industries

*No names mentioned are actual friends of mine.

**They were all randomly generated.

***So don’t feel bad about laughing at their names.