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Chatterbox: In This Month's Issue
Hello everybody! Welcome to this brand new and sanitized edition of the... MONTHLY CHECK-UP! Just because we’re all locked up in Corona doesn’t mean that we can’t have tons of April - flavored fun! We still have an MCU chock-full of fun pranks AND how to avoid them. And if that’s not enough, we have hilarious jokes that will make any April rain go away! Like, tear rain. Or, uh… Anyway, with three of Luna-Starr’s, uh...star-spangled awards, and our location of the month, this will surely be a…a...Andrea, a little help here? Uh, okay, anyway, let’s get started with the IMPORTANT DATES! Apr. 1 - April Fools! (Vansix and Lila) Apr. 2 - World Autisim Awareness Day (M.M) Apr. 3 - World Party Day Apr. 4 - Walk Around Things Day Apr. 5 - National Dandelion Day Apr. 6 - Sorry Charlie Day Apr. 7 - Caramel Popcorn Day Apr. 8 - Draw a Picture of a Bird Day Apr. 9 - Name Yourself Day (Alex) Apr. 10 - National Siblings Day Apr. 11 - National Pet Day (M.M) Apr. 12 - Walk On Your Wild Side Day Apr. 13 - Scrabble Day (Alex) Apr. 14 - Reach as High as You Can Day Apr. 15 - World Art Day Apr. 16 - National High Five Day Apr. 17 - National Haiku Poetry Day Apr. 18 - World Heritage Day (M.M) Apr. 19 - World Liver Day (M.M) Apr. 20 - Patriot’s Day Apr. 21 - Kindergarten Day Apr. 22 - Earth Day(Alex and Spellbond) AND Jellybean Day! (Alex) Apr. 23 - World Book and Copyright Day (M.M) Apr. 24 - Arbor Day Apr. 25 - World Penguin Day Apr. 26 - Majestic Mary’s Birthday! (M.M) Apr. 27 - Tell a Story Day Apr. 28 - Great Poetry Reading Day Apr. 29 - International Dance Day (M.M) Apr. 30 - National Honesty Day
Awesome dates! Uh…(Carp, I’m trash at transitions…) **Maybe you shouldn’t have trashed me last month, then! *sqlurp* We interrupt this MCU to bring you an ad for Puck’s Prank Store! AY YOU THERE! YE! YOO! Do you like Pranks Pie Causing anarchy Chemistry? If you answered yes to any of these questions (or even if you didn’t), you should come down to Puck’s Prank Store! They have pranks of all types! Small pranks, Tall pranks, Heavenly Pranks, Jagged Pranks, Merciful Pranks, Windy Pranks, I’m-just-randomly-generating-words Pranks! New pranks come up every day, so make sure to check in every day! Every hour! Every minute! Every Second! Never Leave! Stay Always! Become One With The Prank! Sell your SOul to Prank! This has been a PSA. Now, back to the... THE LMWAY! (Last Month We Asked You) Last Month We Asked You: What would you hide inside eggs instead of candy and money? Emekittycon said: I would put in a few rubber snakes that pop out at you, and they would scare you so much! cerinthe said: cute keychains or charms, like for charm bracelets Spellbound: Hmmmm.....well, if it's for an only child then something meaningful to that person, but otherwise.....stickers. Majestic Mary said: Nothing. Everyone would get excited to open their egg, and then... Nothing. I love me some good anti climax. [Side Note: You’re Evil] Finally, Luna-Starr said: I would hide clues in them that lead you to the next clue, and so forth, in a scavenger hunt for the ultimate end prize, like a giant Easter basket full of goodies. … *... **My GOSH! Can we PLEASE just get over this? **Zeke! You’re taking her side, too? *I’m not taking any sides, I’m just prioritizing work! **The only work I see YOU doing is cavilling at my every movement! *That’s not - wait, was that Dictionary.com’s word of the day for March 7th? **Yup! Yesterday’s was felicific; causing or tending to cause happiness! *Ooh, that’s - Wait a second this is exACTLY WHAT I MEAN! Hey, while they’re ferociously discussing, let’s hear some APRIL JOKES!
Q:If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? A: Pilgrims (Alex) Q:What's the best month for monkey business? A:Ape-ril (Spellbound) Q:Why is Everyone so tired on April 1st? A:They just finished a long March (Spellbound) Snake one: "Are we poisionous?" Snake two: "I don't know, why?" Snake one: "I just bit my toungue." (Emekittycon) *Andrea, you’re not listening.
**So what?! All you ever do is get cross at me anyway!
*another good word...but anyway, Andrea, that is not the point here. We can have this discussion later. We have an engagement prior to our discussion, and that takes first priority.
**Zeke, you know we can’t focus on that. Ella has ADHD. It’s normal for her to get distracted easily. Like you said last time, we can’t control that, so we might as well just-
*No, Andrea. Ella has a mental disorder, that’s true, but it's not an excuse to just mess around constantly. Like it or not, we have to be responsible, work hard, and persevere despite our shortcomings. We can slip up every now and then, sure, but we can’t just brush it off as ADHD and ignore it. The world doesn’t stop for us, so we need to adapt to the circumstances. In short, as Ella’s left and right brain, we can’t let ADHD define her.
...Wow. Zeke, that was...awesome.
**Gosh, I feel like a real jerk now. Ella, I’m sorry.
It’s okay, Andy.
**No, but like, I’m sorry. Like, really, really sorry-
*Andrea, honey, you’re doing it again. Once is enough.
**Whoops, ahah! Thanks, Zeke.
Let’s move on, shall we! ADVICE COLUMN! **Uh-oh…
*oh, this one?
What’s up, guys?
*Ella, you...seriously don’t remember?
Remember what?
**Ella, we know this is a symptom of ADHD, but this is a serious topic. You can’t just forget something like this.
What?
*(The deletion, Starburst.)
Oh. OH. My gosh, I’m so sorry…
*Ahem* Yes, we greatly apoligize, but due to the lack of time we’ve been experiencing recentely, we’ve realized that the MCU needs to be shortened down. Looking at all of our sectors, and thinking very, VERY hard about all of this, we’ve decided that our advice column is the least popular and most strenous to write. Therefore, we have ruled to cut it. Thank you for understanding. Anyway, let’s move on to our... YOU JUST GOT PRNONK’D’E’D! **HAHHAHAHAH *ahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Eheheheheh...just kidding! April Floof, everybody! (Luna-Starr, we are stealing that.) **Sorry if we gave you a heart attack! *Look on the bright side; at least we’re not watching anyone through their screens*! [*If A.W is reading: all of the Floofs gradually stop laughing and look at you with blank eyes. They are boring into your very soul. You cannot escape them.) **THAT’S RIGHT! *Double the Floof… **Double the BOOF! *OW! Oh, so it’s a pillow fight you want, eh? Then it’s a pillow fight you’ll get...Afterthisdoublefeatureofcourse! **Man... HOW TO AVOID BEING PRANKED! Be CONSTANTLY aware of your surroundings. You can't wander mindlessly on April Fools Day. Another tip: Write "April fools" on the back of your hand, so whenever you see your hand, you'll remember that it's April Fool's Day. Then you won't fall for anything. (M.M) Avoid being prank victims by never accepting food from someone on April Fool's Day, being skeptical about almost everything pranksters say, and carefully checking your surroundings before moving/functioning/anything-ing. XD (Luna-Starr) Well, we don't really do pranks at my house-or at my school-so I'm not super educated in this feild of stuff. I once tried to trip someone by attaching a string to the sides of a doorway, but I did it while everyone was awake, so they all saw, and I didn't plan it out, so it didn't really work out. My advice is, plan out exactly what you're gonna do down to the very last detail, then do the night of march 31. (Spellbound) FUN PRANK IDEAS! Put glitter on top of a fan, and then when it’s turned on...all heck will break loose.
Spill some nail polish on cling wrap and put it on your mother’s bed!
Speak entiwewy wike dis fow as wong as yoo want and act wike it’s nowmal! UwU
Move everything in a room a few inches to the left or right. Then, watch people stumble! Give someone a glass of water...but it’s actually white vinegar!
And finally, give someone a cut straw full of sprinkles and say it’s sour candy!
**Can we fight now? *Nah, Location of the Month’s up ne- *SlurPWH* *Oh, not again. HEY THERE KIDS! You like mischief! You like pranks? Or pronks? Or Prawns? Then join the official Prank Club, sponsored by Floof Industries! We Have: Pranks Access to Area 51 And isn’t that all you need? So come on down today and get FREE PRAWNS! (Disclaimer:No free prawns will be given.) Ok. Anyway... LOCATION OF THE MONTH! In third place, we have… THE EASTER BUNNY’S GUEST ROOM! Why: Although this one is funny in its mysterious aura, It doesn’t fit in the box! In second place, we have… ON A MYSTICAL, MAGESTIC UNICORN’S BACK! Why: y u u n i c o e r n Why: Aw In first place, we have… A PLASTIC EGG! Why: It’s the only one that will fit, and it’s month related! Great Work! **y u u n i c o e r n *UGH! DON’T EVER SAY THAT AGAIN! PLEASE! I’M BEGGING YOU! Haha, now we can terrrize Zeke. *PLEASE DON’T! **DUDE IT’S THE AWARDS! You like the awards, Andy? **I don’t. I LOOOOOVVVVEEE THEM! Why? Because it’s a quick and simple way to celebrate the achievements of our fellow CBers despite our limited time on this site for homework reasons, which is the perfect way to let an elder CBer lend her knowledge in a field she knows much more about? **YE- *Because it scores us friend points with Luna-Starr. **ye… Oh, Ok. Well let’s give a nice round of applause for Luna-Starr and her amazing work on the CBer AWARDS! (Awarded by Luna-Starr) Most encouraging/helpful artist: Agent Winter! I love how you're so encouraging to everyone who posts on the art thread! You always have great feedback and constructive criticism. I love how you give both compliments and advice. Great job! Best inspiration thread: La'Crosse! Your comparison of life to a camera was so beautiful. It was so inspiring to a lot of us, and it got even better when you opened it up to any other quotes we wanted to share! Thank youfor giving us something to be encouraged by! Most creative SI: Commas and Such! A grammar SI! This is such a unique idea. It's great to see how inventive and original you guys can be. It was especially fun to watch this play out when everyone was correcting others' mistakes! XD Great use of imagination! **APRIL MCU IS DONE! *Make sure to comment for the next MCU! Here’s what we’ll accept: May jokes Location of the Month Ways to honor the soldiers even in quarintine! LMWAY (You have $946 dollars to plan a Memorial Day Party. How do you spend it?) CBer awards! *Additionally, if you have any ideas for future advice columns or LMWAYs, PLEASE tell us! **We’re always accepting new ideas, because making the MCU is harder than it seems! If yall have any suggestions, make sure to comment them! We appreciate it more than we can say!
Thank you guys SO much for that. It feels so good to clear up the tension, and I’m really proud of you guys for taking intiative.
**Hey, don’t look at me! Look at Zeke!
*Oh, it was nothing, just rerouting our focus to what matters. From now on, Ella, I promise there will be no more messing around on MCUs from us!
**Wait what
Haha, you don’t have to go that far, Zeke. Besides, I think the readers actually like it.
*Really? They find joy in the meaningless, senseless antics we have?
**It’s not meaningless…
Yeah, Zeke. They actually enjoy it a lot. You guys have been a huge part in making our prescence here known. You just work so perfectely together, Even if it is a bit cliche.
**Wow, well, um…
You two can still do what you want, ‘kay? Just no more career changes, and try to keep the property damage to a minimum.
*You can count on us!
**I, uh, think I have some...stuff to attend to. Buh-bye!
*Wonder what’s wrong with her?
Beats me. Better go check on her so I can do this outro.
*Right away, Ma’am. Hey, CBers! How’s it going? I really hoped you like this weird ‘arc’ thing with Floof. I’m trying to flesh out Andy and Zeke’s personalities a bit, but it won’t be my best work, rest assured! Does it take away from the MCU’s charm, or add to it? Let me know down below; like I said earlier, your input really helps me know how to run this newsletter, so please be honest! Anyway, I have pranks to plan, so make sure to comment new submissions so the next MCU can be sparkly-tastic - aaand I’m never saying that again. Till the next MCU, Floof Industries
**No.
In fact, IT’S A DOUBLE FEATURE!
submitted by Floof Industries , In A Plastic Egg
(April 1, 2020 - 1:45 pm)
(April 1, 2020 - 1:45 pm)
(April 2, 2020 - 7:53 pm)
TOP TOP!!! :)
(April 3, 2020 - 1:59 pm)
I love Andrea's and Zeke's personalities, and listening to them in all the MCUs! Keep it up. Anyway, for the next MCU:
Important dates (which you did not mention, but I'm assuming you're taking?):
1st sunday of May (for us, May 3): World Laughter Day
May 7: World Athletics Day
May 10: Mother's Day
May 12: WORLD NURSES DAY (which we should be celebrating every day)
May 15: International Day of Family
May 18: International Museum Day
May 21: National Anti-Terrorism Day
May 22: International Day for Biological Diversity
May 31: Anti-Tobacco Day
Well you know in North Carolina there ain't no anti-tobacco, nuh-uh, no sir, not in this state! (obviously I don't use tobacco. NC's biggest cash crop is tobacco)
Location of the Month: War Memorial Site (because, Memorial Day!)
To honor the soldiers while in quarantine, make cards! If you have a family member in the military, send it to them, and they will definitely appreciate it. You can also make a video thanking the soldiers and post it online - never underestimate the power of social media, especially in these trying times!
LMWAY: Well, assuming we are no longer in quarantine... I would go to the pool, because my pool opens on Memorial Day, and I would buy pizza for the ENTIRE pool. I would also buy more soda for the soda toss, so there would be less face-kicking and underwater fighting for a single can of off-brand soda. Then I would buy everyone ice cream, and then, after the pool closed, some of my friends would come home with me and we would have a huge party with all the most unnecessary things.
THE END!!!!!!!
(April 4, 2020 - 8:55 am)
LotM: field full of flowers (brought to you by April Showers)
Ways to honor soilders: put up flags, celebrate memorial day (no brainer), sing the national anthem
LMWAY: I'd put flags up all over my house, order potato chips (original, barbaque, sour cream and onion, etc) hire a live band to play outside my house, sitting 6 feet apart, give 200$ to the wounded warrior project, get 40 hot dogs, 50 hamburgers and buns for both things, give anything left to the ww project
Advice Column: moving
(April 4, 2020 - 3:40 pm)
For a moment I thought you put moving for the LOTM and I was terrified
(April 7, 2020 - 11:35 am)
I like the bickering and character development with Andrea and Zeke! Keep it up! I'm still reading!
LMWAY: Let's do a traditional barbecue! Hot dogs, hamburgers, veggie burgers, all the condiments, and, if there's any cash left over, maybe some lawn games. Like hula hoops and stuff.
Ways to Honor Soldiers: Like M.M said, cards. I mean, if you know any soldiers. Which personally, I don't think I do.
Location of the Month: In a Tree.
I submitted this one before, but I ran out of ideas, so...
I hope you like trees.
(April 4, 2020 - 8:30 pm)
Here's one of the many, many jokes I heard in movies:
Q: What do you call a female horse after dark?
A: A nightmare!
(April 5, 2020 - 11:51 am)
Location of the month: Outside, disobeying quarantine
Also I put in a job application last month and you didn't respond? I think the last comment on the thread was by PygmyOwl, but I don't remember what it was called. I'm still up for the job, if you would like to look over my application.
(April 5, 2020 - 5:33 pm)
You are hired, I am now creating a policy that anyone who puts in an application is immeafiatey hired because I can't keep track of ya'll
(April 5, 2020 - 6:57 pm)
Cool. XD
(April 6, 2020 - 3:42 pm)
I would like to know what a Floof employee does, because I might be interested.
(April 8, 2020 - 1:05 pm)
Floof employees are required to provide three pieces of MCU content every month for the sector they sign up for. In return, they can occasionally have special advantages on Floof posts!
(April 9, 2020 - 1:46 pm)
Could I apply?
(April 10, 2020 - 3:42 pm)
(April 12, 2020 - 8:16 am)
*falls over laughing* “They are boring into your very soul” *more hysterical laughter*
*suddenly stops laughing* But I have no soul. It has been consumed by Darkness.
Anyway, for the LMWAY, I would have a giant pool party, including many types of super soakers (the tiny one-shot ones, the huge cannon-type ones, and the medium sized ones that are always pump-activated even though they have triggers). There will also be an all-you-can-eat buffet, and a multiplayer VR game with a screen showing what’s going on in-game so other people can watch. I will also be projecting onto a wall the Captain America movies (on repeat). After the party, I’ll invite my friends over to play video games and have Klondike bars, if they’re not too full from the buffet.
(April 8, 2020 - 10:09 pm)