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So I went
Chatterbox: Pudding's Place
So I went
So I went to a midnight showing of Eclipse (what? I didn't have to pay and my friend and I MST 3K'd it) and of course I have to write a review now that I'm not sleep deprived or caffeine high.
It was... pretty bad. Mostly because they recast Victoria and the new one was really, really bad. Worse than I thought she would be, even. I almost cried she was so bad. Riley was good though, and the only way Bree could have possibly been a bigger woobie was if she was Summer Glau instead of whoever it was they cast. And the score was even better than I thought it was going to be. The only problem was that the director continued with the whole using pop/rock songs interspersed with the score rather than opting for just the orchestrations, which was a shame because, dear lord, I did not come to this movie to hear bands with whiny singers, I came for Howard Shore.
The dramatic staring has gotten worse. It used to be Ed and Bella. Now it's everyone. And WTH was up with the porcelain vampires? Seriously, if you rip the hand off of a bloodthirsty living monster it should not look like chalk wrapped in a thin porcelain coating. I don't care if they're rock hard golems with diamond skin, they used to be human and there should be something resembling muscles and veins and bone and stuff. And the bit when one of the newborns smashed another one's head? There should have been brains, not shards of porcelain. Argh.
Hm, what else...
Oh, yeah. Edward was creepy in this movie. Like, a hundred times more than he was in Twilight or New Moon. I mean, the scene where he killed Bella's engine? Against all odds that was creepier than it was in the books.
Also, also, Edward and Jacob had more chemistry than Bella and Edward. Like, way more. Even the fans noticed.
And, I mentioned this, but Victoria? Horrible.
submitted by TNÖ, age 16, Deep Space
(July 1, 2010 - 5:27 pm)
(July 1, 2010 - 5:27 pm)
The previews looked SO good!!!!!!! I read Twilight and I didn't really like it. But this movie actually looked good in the previews. But the effects sound horrible. And what was up with the rising out of the water part? And does Taylor Lautner ever wear his shirt? I don't see how peole like Team Edward or Team Jacob. (Anyone see that Burger King commercial? Hilarious!!!) Team Sam (leader of the wolfpack) is the CUTEST, but thats just me.
(July 2, 2010 - 1:56 pm)
Henh, EdwardxJake is an amusing thought.
I just got back from seeing the movie... it was /so/ not worth $10.50. I had a serious problem with the vampires smashing like porcelain thing.
The new Victoria was AWFUL. I don't know what I was expecting, but she just was so terrible she made me shudder.
The best part was probably Riley. He was still doing the intense dramatic thing that they all do, but I think the difference was he was good at it. And it was sad at the end when the wolf was eating him and he was screaming for Vicky.
Billy Burke is still the only comic relief; Ed and Bella were annoying as always... not much different there. Similiarly, the one thing you can always count on with twi-movies, no matter who the director is, is that they will totally take advantage of green screens. Check.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but there was one scene where you could actually see the hairspray residue in rpattz's hair.
And is it just me, or does anyone else notice the big similiarities between the JasperxMarie relationship and the RileyxVicky relationship? They really played that up in this movie.
(July 2, 2010 - 7:12 pm)
It does make the tent scene more entertaining. And it explains their obsessions with Bella; they're using her as a proxy.
Like I said, I only went 'cause I got a free ticket (having friends who work in the theatre is a good thing). Is it seriously 10.50 to see a movie where you are? ...and everyone was complaining when Bill upped the price fifty cents to $8.
Yeah, the porcelain smashage was lame. I wouldn't have minded if it was more of an explosive shattering, like you'd expect if someone smashed a diamond (which, while extremely hard and difficult to chip, are extremely brittle and will shatter if you hit them hard enough), which wouldn't have made any more sense but would have been funny nevertheless.
And the new V's wig was... strange. And shorter than Rachel Lefevre's hair, which was dumb. Stupid idiotic casting choices.
Score aside, Riley was definitely the best part of the movie. He even hammed a little ("WHAT did I SAY about KEEPING a LOW PROFILE?!?!") and as you said he made the dramatic staring a little believable. And I feel so sorry for him. What with new Victoria's horrible acting mucking up the sympathy she had before when she was played by an actually good actor, Riley was pretty much the only sympathetic character.
Green screens AND conspicuous CGI, though I will admit it's improved from the last movie (and the first one isn't even worth mentioning). And the wirework was still kinda obvious.
Ha, given that vampires are so flammable anyway he should be more careful about using all that hairspray...
Re: JasperxMarie: I rather thought that was the point.
And another thing that annoys me: I can't remember if this was in the book as well, but they set it up like Bella was going to get her priorities straight and change her mind about the whole vampire/marrying the abusive sparkly vampire. I mean what with realizing everything she's going to miss out on, and the scene with her mom where I actually felt sorry for her for a few minutes, and Jessica's valedictorian speech about making mistakes and not rushing in to things, her dad's comment about how if she went missing he wouldn't stop looking, not ever, etc. And then she just goes on with the plan anyway. I mean, good lord, how selfish, dependent and idiotic can you get?
On a slightly unrelated topic: I read TSSLoBT yesterday. It was an improvement on Twilight etc., but not by much. And Smeyer needs someone to explain to her what continuity is and why Sir Terry Pratchett is the only one who can get away with flinging it to the curb (because his series is thirty years old, and there's an in-universe explanation why the continuity is all tangled up and makes no logical sense whatsoever).
(July 3, 2010 - 11:40 am)
Wow, you just gave me a whole new perspective on the tent scene. XD
I don't know why it was $10.50... my family and I went to see Toy Story 3 a few days before I saw Eclipse and it was only 7.50 per ticket. And Eclipse wasn't in IMAX or anything... huh.
It wasn't only the wig though; her face was also significantly different from Rachel Lefevre's and it had this... I don't know, innocent look about it. If they really had to recast Vicky, they could have found someone better.
Riley was definitely the only sympathetic character, with the possible exception of Bella's mom, who I was feeling a little sorry for after that quilt scene. Like you said, incredibly selfish on Bella's part. And I just read the book recently, and as far as I remember there was no setting up of things so Bella would have second thoughts. The fact that they did that in the movie really only makes her look worse.
I haven't read TSSLoBT, but it was supposed to basically be an insight into the whole newborn-vampire-army thing, right? How was it?
...um. *feels dumb* What is continuity, exactly? *is too lazy to lug out A Glossary of Literary Terms*
(July 6, 2010 - 6:49 pm)
When things in a series match up to the facts in the series previously. Or when the author doesn't contradict him/herself.
TSSLoBT was about Bree, the vampire who was executed by the Volturi at the end of Eclipse. She was horribly boring and Victoria didn't make any appearances beyond a brief conversation with Riley and the Volturi (which is what I meant about continuity, they didn't know who was behind things in Eclipse if I remember prorperly), but some of the secondary characters (especially Riley) were appropriately good.
Oh, but Smeyer still fails subtlety forever. Anyone who did not foresee Diego's death at least from the time he goes to tell Riley about the sparkling deserves to think Twilight etc. is a masterpiece of literature.
(July 9, 2010 - 8:37 pm)
Re: Wolves: Nah, other than Jacob they were all either really skinny or kind of paunchy and gross in this movie. Also, Team Sam?! Did you miss the part about how he slashed Emily's face off to make her fall in love with him? I don't care how cute you think he is, that's not the sort of guy you want to marry.
I'll stick with Team Tyler's Van, thanks very much.
(July 3, 2010 - 11:47 am)