Crackling

Crumbling

Just like my heart,

Made of olivine;

I should have know,

Reigned in my jealousy

Or extinguished it all together,

Maybe then, we'd be fine;

Now, like dust in the wind,

Like the creaking of glaciers,

Falling apart,

I see our castles falling out--

Estranged;

Yes, I watch your platform,

Falling faster,

And all I can do is watch;

Listening to the crackling sound

Of fires burning our empires away,

Of splintering wood and crumbling stone;

That letter that should have saved us all

burning

Along with our legacies. 

This is a stretch to fit the theme... oh well XD

~

an autumn-born wind

reminiscent of a whisper of spring

glides down from the rafters of the sunlit sky,

but it rushes past me,

through me,

like it knows that I am just a ghost or

a mirage held together

by strings of reality.

a rose twirls in my hand,

desolate and bleached

and every ounce of beauty

is caught and lost in my mind

that crackles and snaps like static from a radio.

you try to speak with me 

but your voice turns to ash in the inferno,

and all I can hear is

crackling, crackling, crackling. 

my hand closes around the rose

and I only realize the thorns are tearing into me

when blood falls into the wind,

grey and cold and

lifeless. 

Oop am I too late? I forgot to enter a poem (again) but here I am now :)

Thanksgiving 2020: A true story

It is dark outside

The sun has set and the moon has not yet risen

and the lights from inside can't cut through the night that comes too early in the winter

It is cold outside too

chilly chilly chilly

cutting into my bones despite the blanket wrapped tight around me

feet tucked up in its sags

And people are talking,

their voices muffled by their masks,

but I focus my eyes on the crackling fire

and let the voices fade into the background

It is warm and bright and cheerful

and brings me into this moment,

holds me here,

a glowing beacon fixed in my memory

amid months of black boxes & darkness & Zoom & masks & bad news

all blurred together like my vision when I've been staring at a screen all day and haven't gotten enough sleep

The fire crackles, 

and I let out a breath into the cold air,

and I am here

First off, I want to thank you all SO much for putting your time into these poems! I also want to say: this judging was SUPER. HARD!! All of the poems are so amazing- but we have to make a decision, as the saying goes. 

⋆☾☽⋆

HONORABLE MENTIONS! In no particular order, either! Fun!

⋆☾☽⋆ 

Cranberry! I love how you chose another interpretation!

Wreeboo! I love your linebreaks especially- for some reason I really love linebreaks? Dunno, it's just something that's underlooked. 

Silver Crystal! I love the stretch! Honestly it just makes the whole thing better, it's an unlooked side of it. 

Azalea! I love your comparisons!

⋆☾☽⋆

3rd Place: 

Lumi! I absolutely loved the inspiration and it was amazing! Tied with Kitten! I loved the reality of it all! 

2nd Place:  

Jaybells! I loved the elegance!

1ST PLACE!!

CONGRATS TO DREAMIING! I absolutely love the emotion you put in it, and it's like a different side of linebreaks..wow! 

gah thank you,,

um- new theme will be scars, and i will judge on the 28th, okay?

i cant wait to see your poems! 

untitled

I don’t know how the dagger-stares and the words that lash out like whips, how they somehow escape me

even though I don’t want to hurt you, even though every single time I tell myself I’ll never do it again

so maybe you should just leave me behind.

I know you said you couldn’t, wouldn’t, but it’s not worth it to me to watch you hurting and how every time the scars heal over

I just hurt you again, and watch them reopen, raw and vulnerable and stinging and it hurts me too.

I know it doesn’t ever go away because even when the scars heal over 

you always tell me that there’s still a dull ache and you can still tell when it’ll rain because your heart starts hurting again.

But you say you can’t just get up and leave

you say that I am all you have left and I can control it and I’m not trying and I wish that were true

because if I wasn’t trying I wouldn’t care

but you don’t know how much I love you and I know I never show it and I know that every time 

the scars reopen they take longer to close up again and I know

It’s all my fault.

The world doesn’t revolve around me

I am not the sun and you are not a planet, only here to bask in my glory and beg for my light and love me as your reason for living

if anything you are my sun

and my planet is destroying you and eventually we’ll all die and it will be all my fault but

I don’t deserve you so why don’t you make it easier on yourself and me and leave-

that sounds so horribly bitter and no-

I did it again and I’m so sorry but I can’t even get those words out because I’m too choked up

and the words are still there, hanging, and your eyes aren’t even filling with tears like they usually do

I’ve crossed a line this time and I think I’ve finally killed the sun

so now I pay the price as I wither with you as you tell me

love, i’m scared, i can’t feel it when you hurt me anymore, the blisters don’t ache, they’re just numb

And I know why even if you don’t because don’t you know that you’ve built up so many scars around your heart that

it’s so calloused not even my worst can penetrate and I-

I’m so sorry because now there’s nothing I can do and as you read this I hope that you’ll find someone else to love who won’t break your heart every time they speak

and finally the wall will come down and the scars will fade and you will be happy

but now you say you love me still because I’m family and that I can do better, be better than this but can I?

The scars will never fade as long as I’m here and the wall will always be raised unless I can change but by now I hope I’m not too far gone because your un-hurting is breaking me more than your crying ever did

because didn’t I know that the words will never go away even if I can’t hear them anymore and they will always be there

in your face, in your eyes, in our hearts

to remind me that some lines should never be broken and it’s all my fault.

Thin silver lines

Crisscross your skin

Like spiderwebs

Tear-stained cheeks,

rumpled hair, and

Red-rimmed lids

My everything aches for you

When I see you like this

I wish I could kiss your pain away

And hug away those tears of yours

I wish I could take the scars that stripe your skin

And have you smile blissfully once again. 

I want to see people 

I want to hold people

Yet I crash to the moon in the mountains

Am I a person or a reflection of the world around me

I want to cut my hair off, rip out my heart

Sew it in my mind, but my voice is fading

I feel old, a sign I'm too young

I'm tired of feeling exhausted 

Can I live in the shower

No, we're running out of hot water

I want to fall into music, dip my toes in the sound

Yet there's a headache drumming through my body

I want someone to cry with

Someone to breath in and spit back out

It feels strong to be cruel and I dread being weak

I don't want to leave the train yet

There's scars running through the inside of my stomach

Racing up to my head

Ropes pulling trapdoors open

Burying my soul with stones

Raw ribbons that ache when I am

I'm afraid of living 

Here I am, brave by breathing. 

Scars Inside

When you see me

I'm cheerful

optimistic

the equivalent

of a free bird

soaring

through the skies

But when I'm alone

There's nobody to see me

I'm broken inside

And if you look

Inside

You'll see 

A whole new side of me

I know

It sounds impossible

But the scars

From my past

Will never heal

I know

It sounds weird

and completely

out-of-this-world

But it's real

Real. 

I swear.

It's real. 

I only wear the masks

To prove

That I can make friends

Without them having to pity me

'Cause of my sadness

Don't wanna reveal

Who I really am

'Cause then everyone'll fear me

For who

I 

Am

Don't wanna be

Who I am

Wish I could

Just start over

A new world

Without the scars

From

My

Past

Sometimes

I look

Past

My soul

And there I see

A world

A world

That's my heaven

A world

Where

I

Can

Be

Myself.

A 

world

where

nobody

judges

me

based

on

my

scars

A 

world

where

we

are

judged

not

by

our

race

our

scars

just

judged

by

our

personality

A

world

where

i

can

be

myself

without.

fear.

~

*bows* thank you for listening to that little thought dump!