Day Uno

The speaker of those words is a man in a doorman’s uniform and a brown fedora. He explains as the CBers are ushered in that he is simply a doorman, by the name of Jonny Smyth, whose sole purpose in life was to open and close the door. The CBers would meet their guide in a few minutes. As for the pudding part? What pudding? What is this nonsense? He didn’t say a thing about pudding. (Mirax was rather disappointed by this, she was looking forward to that pudding filled future.)

The room they enter  is circular and two floored, with a wooden desk against one wall, (Which was observed by Nova that is was covered in huge claw marks. She shudders.) and doors lining all along the walls. In the middle are two grand, red carpeted staircases, which presumably lead to the second floor that overlook the first. The doors are marked, The Marvelous Museum of Impossible Wonders, The Library of Voices, The Library of Silence, The Desert of Infinity, Management, Kitchen/Dining, Rooming. There is one final door, iron and badly dented, that has no marking. No one dares asks what is hold. No one wants to know, after Scylla had approached it and suddenly forgot who she was.

The hotel feels generally like almost all hotels, old fashioned and sleepy, so much so in fact that you may want to fall asleep on your feet. A few of the CBers actually did, and a few more started sleep walking. (Namely Ultron, Saphira, Novelist. As if it wasn’t bad enough to have an A.I. sleepwalking, there’s a dragon and a writer to boot.)

The few minutes that the doorman has promised it would take stretch into half hours, and even more half hours. More CBers fall asleep, (Namely Beth, Kestrel, and Sydney. Now there’s a bird and a major city sleepwalking) the ones who are akwai are getting restless. Finally, Kate finds the “Ring for Service” bell, conveniently located in the corner of your eye, and starts to relentlessly pound on it. She wakes up all of the sleeping CBers, but no one else shows up.

“Where are they?” Princess starts pacing the length of the circular room, getting more and  more annoyed.

“l told you this wouldn’t go well.” Richard mutters to Tara.

“You see the trick to hiding bodies is to get away with is in the first place.” MP explains to Chary, who wraps a protective arm around Hallia. “Bodies? Eek! Where?”

Unexpectedly, there is a starling plume of smoke, that makes everyone start coughing. For a few seconds, no one is able to see anything.

“Hello and--coughcoughhackhack--welcome to--coughcough--the wondrous Hotel--cough hackhack--La'Faye!” The Teller manages to say, before having a coughing attack. When all of them are able to breath again, and most of the smoke cleared away, They are faced by a hooded figure, presumably their guide, who is nonchalantly floating a few inches off of the ground.

“Ah, erm, yes. Sorry about the smoke. It’s getting fixed.” She informations them, in a tone that suggests that she is not the slightest bit sorry about it.

“Oh my lucky stars!” yelps Fia, still coughing.

“But if you would please come along this way, we can get you settled in and promptly began tours right on the marrow. The Teller sort of.....drifted over to the door marked “Rooming” She snaps her fingers (which is a ridiculously hard thing to do when you’re wearing gloves. You don’t think it is? Why don’t you try to?) and the door opens, reliving a hallway lined with photographs of smoke, all of them, simply smoke. When all of the CBers had gathered, The Teller snaps her fingers again. Nothing happens. She looks slightly annoyed, though how you could tell without seeing her face, l don’t know. “What the--”

Suddenly, what seems to be cannons shoot every quickly from the wall, almost too fast to see, and spray with the force of a fire hose, millions and millions pounds of glitter at several tons per second.

Everyone present ducks very quickly, either out of wanting to stay alive or ninja training, with the exception of poor Ashlee, whom has been sleep walking. The glitter blasts out for several second, with the force of a blizzard.

As the deadly glitter stops and slowly drifts down like a over-happy snow storm full of rainbows, September is the first to notice something. “Ashlee! Where is Ashlee?” Zeon and Quill began to panic. The rest of the gathered party start to search, but alas they search in vain, for Ashlee will never be seen again, she was torn in millions of atoms by the glitter. "Oh sweet glory!" Squeaks Fia. "She's gone!"

“Why are these things even here?!” Shadow snaps, most very annoyed. “It’s like they’re just here to….kill people.” Sandra narrows her eyes at the hooded figure, carefully removing shards of glitter from her clothes.

“It’s just like a trap….” Bookworm also narrows her eyes at The Teller.

“No! I swear l wasn’t trying to kill anyone!” The Teller's argument seems rather weak in the face of what just occurred. “They--they malfunctioned. l’m pretty sure of it. Something or someone, rigged them. I don’t even know if they’re able to go that fast!” Despite her protests, no one believes her. Paris gives her a hard stare as the rest of them file past, feet crunching on the glitter.

“Erm, ah, yes, rooming is this way.” The Teller indIcates the a passageway, winding and lined with photographs now entirely consisting of oranges.

Spyro takes an entirely too long time to stare at each and every beautiful artistic photo of the wondrous orange. He spends a good ten minutes getting completely blown away by how much this photographer simply understands the nature of oranges. It is beyond any possible words. It is the month of beauty, the--

“Spyro? Come look at this, will you?”

“No, you come and look at these oranges.” Suddenly, he thinks of something perhaps insurmountable to the dragon mind. What if this photographer had dared to capture the brilliance of a donut? Dare he think such a thing?

“H.A.B.” He turns to his counterpart, also breathless, “Don’t you see those oranges?”

“Yes and? They’re oranges. So what?” Having come back to find Spyro and make sure that no glitter cannons got him, H.A.B. is not amused nor patient.

“Just that….” He sighs. No one will ever see the radiant awe of such food, will they? They will never appreciate of art of it. How can they all be so blind? “Never mind.” He says to H.A.B., turning down the passageway, moaning internally.

The two of them arrive to find a pillow fight ensuring, and it was explained by Moon that this was rooming, don’t worry about space because The Teller says the Infinite Hotel Paradox was based off of this room. If she had anything else to say, it was cut off by a disturbingly hard pillow whacking her over the head. Moon was also apparently one of the few people who still liked The Teller after the glitter cannons “malfunctioned.”

The room is a long and large hall, each side lined with rather standard and uncomfortable looking beds. On a supposed mission for science, Jarvis had set out to go find the end of the room. She still hasn't come back.

It is gathered that this is the end of the day, and that after all of the disturbing large amount of pillows have been duly thrown all over the place, the CBers should sleep like normal people, for the tours that start tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~

End Day Uno. Death Toll: Ashlee. Rest in peace. (l was rather sorry to have you be the first one to go, but the fates have spoken.)

Also, yes, l left some people out. Time and length constraints helped with that.  

Eh, don't feel bad. If you knew me in real life, you'd think I was the most scatterbrained person. If it weren't for my mom, I'd end up getting distracted constantly and forgetting everything...

My name is Princess, and it is NOT boring!!! How dare you say that? Who are you? Whoever you are, you NEED to be hanged RIGHT NOW!

Princess, stop overreacting. Sorry, she's just like that. And by the way, that's really good! Princess, can't you find anything good about this? It's your first ski lodge, and your already complaining!

Of course I can find something good about this! I'm a princess! I can do everything! Let's see... well... uh... PUDDING! I like pudding! See? I CAN find something good about this! 

*Rolls eyes* Pudding? Well, I like pudding too, but is that the only thing?

Yes.

Oh, and if it isn't too late, can my new Æ, Bella, join too? She is really looking forward to getting more involved in everything and getting to know everyone!

Day Two

Bella was suddenly simply….there. She was one place, and then not. She blinks several times, her eyes adjusting to the light.

“Hm.” Was all she offered to comment.”How normal.”

And true to those words, the following day pervaded very very normally. Far normally then any of you call normal. Your normal is complete chaos, compared to this normal, believe me. Ah yes. Getting sleepy already? Well I assure you, by the end of this, you’ll be fast asleep.

It all began normally. Like every other day that had ever begun, someone had put ‘40’s style jukeboxes into Rooming.

“Good gracious!” Exclaimed Fia, as the jukeboxes start blaring heavy metal. Literally heavy metal, it’s the sound of tons of metal grinding and roaring as it’s tossed about. Mrs. Elton decides on that spot that this is her favorite genre of music. (“Just listen to the harmony! It’s so relaxing!”)

Sydney wakes up wondering if she knows any ‘40’s heavy metal. Even if she did, she doubts she would be able to imitate that music even with a sore throat and a malfunctioning microphone.

Esthelle wakes up on the wrong side of the bed, that is the dimension filled entirely with alligators. “How very normal.” She mutters quietly, rolling off the side of the bed to avoid the alligator’s hungry jaws.

“What is with her?” Sapphire wonders to Tara, as they watch Moon dance around the room, to the tune of heavy metal. “It’s almost like she thinks this place is actually interesting.” Sir Richard simply yawns, looking very bored.

Emerald is starting to worry, just a slightest bit about Jarvis. She’s been gone all night. “Ultron! Can’t you track her something? She might have, l don’t know, gotten lost!” That was rather abnormal, so annoyed as he was, the A.I. patiently looks for Jarvis’s heat signature in the hotel. He suddenly freezes, and then promptly falls over. Panicked, Emerald attempts to do CPR on him. Which was a rather bad idea, he was a robot and not choking anyways. Hallia blinks at Ultron's dead(ish but not really, robots can’t die) form. “Hrm. A body. l see those everyday.”

After the morning normality has gotten more normal, the CBers, driven by boredom, slowly file out to find the supposed normal food or breakfast.

Spyro stares at the oranges for a few seconds, before turning away. “So normal.”

September is the first one to find the Dining Room. Upon finding it open, she enters and is immediately and rather normally greeted by who must be the normal cook, a normal man in a cook’s uniform with a brown fedora. He says, in a normal but fake French accent, “Welcome, mardamosale, to my humble (but normal) kitchen where l, Jean Snyder, shall serve you the finest food that this world has ever--”

“Mhm. That’s nice. And very normal. I would like some normal food to eat normally for the start of my normal day.” Jean Snyder is baffled, but complies.

“And sir,” He tell Spyro when he normally enters, “l am guessing at your preference, but you would like some of the finest donuts that we can offer, no?”

“Whatever is normal is fine. Just normal.”

~~~~~~

After their normal meal, the group, (with the exception of Ultron who is still kinda dead and Jarvis) gathers as prompted by radium-green and possibly actual radium, neon signs, to “Tour start” by the door marked “Marvelous Museum of Impossible Wonders.” They still keep away from the normal unmarked door, though. Scylla still hasn’t remembered who she is and is normally scaring Chary and Hallia out of their wits.

The Teller appears in the middle of radium-green and possibly actual radium, smoke, that sends everyone into a normal coughing fit. “Great Scott!” Coughs Fia.

Zeon and Quill back away, slowly and normally. They still remember Ashlee very well.

“Ladies and gentlemen!” She hooded figure accents. “I present to you, wonders of wonders, The Marvelous Museum.” She spin for good effect, sending Nova into a coughing fit. (Which was normal, she was a robot after all and wasn’t affected by the things humans where.) Princess yawns. “So really boring, whatever-your-name-is. This isn’t the slightest bit engaging. Just get on with it or whatever?”

The Teller looks rather crestfallen by this, one could tell she was waas like this. She realizes, almost horrified, that everyone else feels the same as Princess does. “But--but, don’t you want it see it? Like it’s all amazing and all and…..” She trails off.

“And normal” Mirax finishes.

“Look, that’s nice and all, but l really don’t care, m’kay? So boringly everyday.” Snaps Silvery, crossing her arms.

Huffing under her breath, The Teller kicks the door open, and drifts through it. “There you go! Get yourselves killed or whatever for all l care! ‘Cause apparently, you don’t care! Have fun boring people!”

“Sheesh, l wonder what’s wrong with her.” Sandra mutters, following the rest of them. (“What did l tell you!  Sheep, all of them!” Nova tell Novelist.)

They enter a large, sunny room, airy and modern looking. It looks like a fairly normal education-type museum sort. The center of it is dominated by a huge skeleton of what looks to be a T-Rex, except on closer examination, the bones are a creamy-off white and its eyes are blue, starry gemstones more than a few feet across. Its claws and teeth look horrifying sharp. Despite being a dragon, Shadow shudders at this terrifying beast. It’s still very normal, though.

The sides of the large room are lined with other various roped in or glass encased curiosities. One larger, covered in dust and stuck in a corner, is filled with sand and stones, bits of machinery and books poking up from the surface of the sand. The plaque reads, “Lost Library of Alexandria.” Alexandra takes a mild interest in things, but after finding it completely normal, wanders off.

H.A.B. discovers an exhibit the is dangerous careening along the floor, sometimes rolling on its side, or somehow trying to fly off of the ground. After nearly getting run over a few times, he read the plaque. “Storm in a jar. Fun for everyone! Put your hand to the glass to feel a real live strom! 100% safe!” That’s all he got to read before the Storm in Jar before is chased him across the room. Paris is perilously hanging over the rail for a similar exhibit, this now being “Whirlpool in a tank! Fun and safety for everyone!” Kate, Brian and Ellak have decidedly been fascinated by something ancient called a “refrigerator” “l wonder what it does.” Kate questions. “It might eat you or something.” Brian points out. Kate laughs at that.

Bolton and Beth are busy tapping on the glass of a cage filled with fluttering books like butterflies, except that they’re written in German.

Brooker has discovered radium-green possibly actual radium clocks, madly banging against the glass of their cage. She presses her face against the glass. The clocks slow down, almost thoughtfully seemingly look at her. Her eyes go wide.

Bookworm and Summer are delightfully flipping through one of those old, dusty history books, except it’s titled “The History of the year 2016 and everything that happened within it.”

As the CBers drift around, looking at everything, normally, mind you. MP still stands at the entrance, as mad as a hornet . (Which isn’t saying much, she was already mad as a hatter to began with.)

“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, DARLINGS? YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO ADD TO MY FANTASY THAT I'M NOT INSANE. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? THERE’S PIES TO BE THROWN AND PEOPLE TO MUR--DRIVE UP THE WALLS.”

Though her words echo around, she only gains very normal glances.

Zeon glances up, but doesn’t think anything of it. He has decided that this huge T-Rex is now his pet for life, and strokes it’s bony skull. He sees a shadow in the corner of his eye and turns around, but it’s nothing. When he turns back, the gem-eyed monster is grinning at him, clacking its jaw. He thus decided it’d be very wise to get out of there, as the monster throws back its head and lets out a roar.

Tsk, tsk, Zeon. You know you never had a chance, did you? That dinosaur loved you too, you know…..as food.

The dinosaur breaks free of its exhibit, its starry eyes tracking Zeon as he dashes across the floor. It moves suddenly, but smoothly. Zeon saw it coming. He always had. He ducks behind an exhibit, but the dinosaur simply crashes through everyone and corners him. It was simply normal, then wasn’t it? Those teeth close around him, disappearing into the dinosaur's innards.

Then, for a few seconds, silence.

Quill stares blankly, standing in now-wrecked museum. She can’t do anything but blink, and blink so more, before a tear escape her eyes and a words her mouth. “Why them…..?”

~~~~~~~~

End Day Two. Death Toll: Zeon. (All deaths are completely random! The murder must not like you, Ashlee.)

Eek, this is creepy. And not normal. What's going on? 

RIP Zeon and Ashlee. We'll miss you.

And that was suspicious of MP. Is the Piester also a murderer?

Day Three

Scylla opens her eyes. Well, first one eyes and then the other eye. She blinks. Was there something that l forgot? She vaguely, sleepily wonders. She rolls to her side and abruptly falls hard onto the floor. Apparently those beds are a lot smaller than they used to be. She suddenly bolts up, as if electrified. She nearly was, the ‘40’s style jukeboxes seems to be dangerously malfunctioning.

“Hallia! Charybdis! l--” She falters, uncertain. What was it? She saw something, something she didn’t know and then--

“Go back to sleep.” Grumbles the only person who hold her, Novelist. It's just then that she realizes that it’s completely dark, and yet she can see shapes, moving and shifting around. She remembers something looking like this, something huge and dark, something terrifying. What was it? She knows, she feels that it is drastically important and yet she can recall nothing. It's lurking in the back of her mind, whatever it is, as if it is hiding in the dark, like a silent companions. Like a shadow. Feeling almost terrified out of her wits, Scylla creeps around the sleeping CBers (many of them had taken to sleeping on the floor, right where other people would trip on them in the middle of the night.) She did trip over Fia, who huffs, “Oh my gosh!” That wakes up Nova (who knew robots could sleep?) who in turn disturbs Sydney into sleepwalking. Scylla has no idea that Sydney is sleepwalking, (l mean, she looks like she’s awake!) and turns to her as she stumbles over several; sleeping CBers. “Do you feel that? I don’t know what it, but it’s there.” She pauses realizing how ridiculous that sounds. Sydney nods, sleepily. “Do-do you know what it is?” Sydney rolls her head back. Scylla takes that as a no. Sydney is awfully untalkative today. “I think….it’s important, l think that i need to find it. Do you think so?” Sydney suddenly collapses on the floor. Scylla takes that as a yes.

She find her way to the door, but not before tripped over a dragon (it was Saphira), involuntarily yelling, waking up Kate. She opens to door, just to find a masked and cloaked figure cockily leaning against the doorway. MP grins behind her mask.

“Hello darling. You know, there’s been some people dying around here.” Scylla suddenly grows very nervous. MP’s voice, far from it’s usual volume, if unnerving.

“Ah, yes. Of course. They were harmless accidents, you know. Harmless.”

“Oh really?” MP raises an eyebrow, but the effect is lost because of her mask. “I'd wager that they were very intentional. Both Ashlee and Zeon, in a row? Accident, you say?” She leans closer. “No, darling, someone is murdering them all. And l am the one to find whoever they are.” Scylla catches her breath. “You aren’t saying what l think you’re saying? I'm not that heartless!”

Scylla has backed into the passageway, the photographs of oranges are lit eerily green by an increased number of clocks on the wall. She can still feel the shadows tugging in the back of her mind.

“Well someone had to do it. Those people didn’t murder themselves. No better place to start then you, then?” There is suddenly a bone-rattling crash and animalistic scream. MP and Scylla whirls around and freeze for a second, before both of them run to see what happened.

Everything has changed. Litilerly.
In the few minutes that MP and Scylla were gone, the room has changed dimension and location twenty-nine times, Jarvis returned from wherever she went of to, Quill has managed to forget that her twin is dead and maybe a piece of her soul along with him, all of the photographs of oranges have turned into real oranges and the photographs of smoke into fake smoke, all the clocks have decidedly affixed themselves in the most awkward and unexpected places, like under carpets and in pillows, something winking into and other among the CBers. Spyro finds the oranges just, and maybe even more magnificent as they were as photographs.

“See.” Scylla gestures around the room, “How could i even think of hurting these innocent--” inconveniently, the room tips on its side, throwing oranges and CBers flying. The three dragons, (Spro, Saphira and Shadow) have suddenly decided that they were instantly very mad at each other and starting getting things on fire.

“Eek!” Speaks Bella. “Kestrel, you--you.” She sputters, and decides that pillows are better than words and proceeds to whack her over the head with one. Kestrel yelps and defends herself with an orange.

“l told you we should have never come.” Princess snaps to Alexandra, across the flaming, pillow and orange battle field of a room.

Bolton trips on the clocks, one after another. Mrs. Elton mourns her inflamed jukeboxes. “They played lovely heavy metal while they were still alive.” She sniffs.

September and Brookeira have decidedly protested the pillow and orange throwing by not waking up at all, they apparently are very heavy sleepers.

“What is she doing?” Tara wipes, alarmed to Richard. For Moon has started to dance the Irish jig to the tune of insanity, all while skillfully dodging dragons and various flying things. She is grinning at it all and very disturbing too.

“Hah! Take that!” Silvery tosses a pillow forcefully at half-asleep Mirax. She took it and a great deal more, for there was also a clock and Bookworm’s midnight reading in that pillow. Thus she got in the middle of a pillow fight, as well as radium poisoning and a face full of literary genius.

MP grinds her teeth. These idiots. Why are they so blind why can’t they see anything. She takes a deep breath.

“WELL YOU PEOPLES. IT SEEMS THAT TODAY IS THE DAY WHERE THE WORLD STAND ON ITS HEAD AND THE INSANE ARE THE SAME AND THE WORLD--”

She is hit by an orange.

“Oh yes? You up there so high an mighty on your soapbox of reform. Well there is revolution in the air!”

Esthelle waves her hand, orange in hand. “Power to the people! This must stop! We are the true power in this world! And we must make things change!”

The crowd gives a resounding cheer, and everyone picks up an orange as well, turning their anger about something they didn’t know to MP on her soapbox.

“WE CANNOT STAND THIS ANY LONGER!” Emerald exclaims.

“DEATH TO TYRANNY!” Screams normally mild Beth, caught up in the moment.

“LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!” Sprankle yells.

“REVO-LU-TION.” Chants the crowd, syllable by syllable.

(“Sheep, the bunch of them.” Ultron mutter, no one hears him.)

“WE WILL SEE THE LIGHT OF DAWN AGAIN!” Esthelle has pushed MP off her soapbox of reform.

(“Crazies, the bunch of them. She mutters. No one hears her.)

Every hand, an orange, every voice, a shout for freedom and liberty. Sandra only briefly wonders what it is they’re rebelling against, but instantly pushes that silly though out of her mind.

“WE WILL LEAD THE ORANGES TO VICTORY!”

“AYE!

“WE WILL OVERTHROW THE TYRANTS!”

“AYE!”

“ORANGES WILL BE SPILLED!”

“AYE!”

(Does that even make sense? H.A.B. wonders.)

“ORANGES WILL FLY! LET THE REVOLUTION BEGIN!”

Not really sure of anything, the Cbers began to give their oranges wings. Paris knocks three people (Daisy, Ellak and Swummer) over by “accident” with her oranges. Princess is in the process of usurping Esthelle from her soapbox, when a very well aimed organe suddenly whacks her in the head. She falls over the soapbox, knocking Esthelle to the ground.

“Oh heavens!” Fia cries. “She’s dead!”

They freeze.

“So thus, here is how all things end. The revolution has taken its first victim.” Esthelle says somberly, looking down at Princess. “Aediu, Princess.”

MP gets up, angered. “What are you even talking about! Someone killed her, plain as plain!”

“Are you against reform?” Beth snarls at MP.

“What is even this “reform”?! Get some--”

MP is promptly pelted with oranges, and “Death to tyranny!”

~~~~~~~~~

End Day Three. Death Toll: Princess. And one by one, they drop like flies.