Chapter Two

Agatha flew home slowly, enjoying the crisp breeze that penetrated the humid air. On the way, she joined up with her best friend, Ida Book, the reading helper and librarian, to visit the Newborn Fairies care facility. 28 baby fairies were in a row in 28 little beds with leaves under them, cotton pods as their pillows, and cobweb blankets over their tiny bodies.

                “Ida,do you think we should finally donate some of our old dresses to the babies?” Agatha asked, pinching the cobweb trim on the bottom of her dress. Ida nodded enthusiastically.

                “They’re all just so cute!” she exclaimed, picking up a small one with extra-pale skin and rocked her back and forth in her arms. But just then Tulip Babe, the Baby-Care fairy, tiptoed into the room.

                “Put that poor child down!” she half yelled, half whispered furiously. Ida was frightened, but still she carefully, painstakingly set the baby back in her cradle. “What do you think you’re doing?” Tulip screeched, shooing Agatha and Ida away from the young girls. “For Creator’s sake, you didn’t even wash your hands!” Now Ida began to cry, flying away into the sunny day. Ida’s departure made Tulip turn to Agatha.

                “You either stay here and help me for the rest of the day, or get lost. Which would you rather choose?” Tulip sneered. Agatha was in shock as she caught up to Ida.

                “I’ve never heard of a fairy being that hostile!” she sighed, landing in front of her house. “I’ll see you later, Ida.” Mom was off running errands, so Agatha gathered some pollen and sprinkled it around the house to freshen the odor o ftheir little mushroom. And in a very short amount of time, Mom arrived with two little shopping bags in her hands.

                “Agatha.. .” Mom huffed, leaning against the pebble chair. “How was your . . . first day of work?”

                “Oh, work was good,” Agatha said, worried. “Why are you wheezing?” Mom sat down, smoothing back her frizzy hair.

                “I flew all the way to Pixie Mall to get us some new dresses.”

                “But why couldn’t you just go to Fairy Shopping Hall?”

                “They were smoothing out the ground where we land, so Fairy Shopping Hall was closed.” But still, Agatha was excited. Pixie Mall sold the prettiest, shiniest, frilliest dresses of them all.

                First, Mom pulled out a mint-green dress with sky-blue fish scales in a diagonal line across the front.

                “This is for you, Agatha,” she said, handing it to her daughter. Agatha gasped, holding it delicately in her hands.

                “Mom, it’s beautiful!” she cried, throwing her arms around Mom in a massive hug. Mom smiled and detached her daughter from her. Then she pulled out another, an orange and yellow tie-dyed leotard with a red tutu, also for Agatha. Agatha had the same reaction, minus the huge hug. Next came Mom’s dresses.

                “First I picked out a dark purple dress with purple-dyed cobwebs as the sleeves. Her other dress was lime green with a navy-blue seashell on a sky blue belt. Mom giggled happily.

                “I thought I might as well have something perky in case Creator decides to start making boy fairies.” She laughed again and set her dresses aside. She opened her mouth to say something but in that moment the seashell whistle was blown, and fairies everywhere began flying towards the Big Rock. I wonder what they need to announce, Agatha thought, joining the crowd. She saw Ida and her mother up ahead, but it was impossible to catch up with them because there were about twenty fairies separating them.

                Tamara Meeting was the new announcer, for she was perched on top of the rock waiting for everyone when they arrived. When the fairies were settled, she began.

                “Hello, fairies of Mushroom Grounds!” she shouted through a shell horn. Obviously she expected us to reply, but that would be unusual. We just sat on the ground, waiting for her to continue. She did, but by the tone in her voice, she was now very, very nervous.

                “Um, we’ve, uh, gathered here today for a special announcement.” Some of the older, pickier fairies groaned, and poor Tamara shook her head. This was not a so far, so good moment. “Tulip Babe, somebody, who will stay anonymous, reported today that one of the baby fairies is sick. If this happens to be true, please remember to take that child to the doctor.” Tulip, who was two people in fron tof me, turned around, her face red, and glared at me. I shrugged, as though to say that I didn’t do, but she didn’t believe me. Her wings were bristling when she looked up at Tamara again.

                “Christie Teeth, Lilac, one of the seniors, has a toothache. She plans to come to your office tomorrow morning. Please expect her and do your best to help her. Beth Clean, Twiggy Park has some litter on its grounds. Please proceed to clean those up right after this meeting. Ti Candy, one of the fairies has had a stomachache for all of today, reportedly because of too much candy. Please remember to stick to the recommended amounts of candy to give out. Fanny Cook, Missy, a newly retired fairy, had food poisoning this morning. Please make sure all of your ingredients and cooking areas are clean at all times. Zielie Talk,the Pixies have a shortage of supplies to make the walkie-talkies; please refrain from coming to work for the next two days. Ella Designer, over the past couple months, we have had some complaints about ‘the same old boring patterns and designs’ for clothing. We hope that you will be able to come up with some fresh new ideas this year. Agatha Powder,” Agatha’s head jerked up at the sound of my name. “Five of the fairies didn’t get their dust today. Please see me after the meeting.” It took all of my energy to hold back her tears, until she realized who had done this. It could only be one person--Natasha. She told me that five of the fairies who were retired had decided to stop ordering fairy dust. I can’t believe I actually thought she was telling the truth! What fairy would be able to live without fairy dust? That Natasha is so mean--and what did I ever do to her?

                As the fairies emptied the meeting area, Natasha walked casually by Agatha, who was waiting for everyone to be gone.

                “I hope you have a fun ‘chat’” she sneered, grinning evilly and quickly flying away before Agatha could make a comeback.

                “Agatha, please come here.” Tamara sat on the edge of the rock, dangling her feet and swaying them this way and that way. “Is this mistake by any fault of yours?” Agatha wondered whether or not she should cover up for Natasha or not.

                “It’s not my fault, Tamara. The old Fairy Dust Supplier, Natasha, was really mean tome!” Agatha defended herself, suddenly feeling a surge of confidence. Tamara nodded slowly.

                “I see . . . then whose fault is it that five fairies did not get their fairy dust today?” Tamara asked. Hopefully she, being the same age as Agatha, would understand what kind of troubles a fairy can get into.

                “It’s Natasha’s fault!” she exclaimed, maybe a bit too loudly. And when she turned around to make sure no one was listening, Natasha was hiding behind some blades of grass. When she realized Agatha had spotted her, she came out into the open.

                “How dare you accuse me of such a thing!” she gasped innocently, clasping her handover her mouth. “I would never be so mean! And anyway, what would I have done, take the bags from the five fairies' porches?” Tamara’s eyes were wide, trying to take in all the information at once.

                “She has a point there, Agatha.” Suddenly it seemed like Tamara favored Natasha very much. “What would she have done, after all?” Agatha had an answer, but suddenly her whole mouth felt numb. She was paralyzed in a state of shock. She had never known a scheming, cruel fairy before. And I thought all fairies were supposed to be nice!

                “Oh, uh, um . . .” she stuttered nervously. “Natasha told me that five of the fairies had decided that they didn’t need fairy dust anymore.” Now Tamara turned to Natasha.

                “Is that true, Natasha?” Sheepishly, Natasha nodded, her head hanging low. “Natasha, did you think that it would end up like this just by one bad deed?” Natasha shook her head. “Did you ever think about the results of a bad deed?” More head-shaking. “Natasha, I’m afraid I’m going to have to punish you for this. I’ll take you to Hannah Discipline’s house at once. Agatha, you are free to go home and rest.” And Agatha did as she was told, flying off with an air of obvious relief. 

does nobody like fantasy anymore???

Awesome story Rachel!!!!! :D I really like it!

1) Did u enjoy that story so far? Yep!

2) Would you like me 2 post more? Yeah!

3) Do u think I'm a good writer? Yes! :)

4) What is ur fave genre? I like fantasy, mystery and historical.

5) Anything I should change? Nothing that I can think of at the moment! :)

6) Extra comments---Great job! :):):)

 The next chapter of my story!!!!!

Chapter Three

Agatha woke with a start. Today was her real first day of work- without Natasha, without anyone around to bother her except Cassidy, who couldn’t bother Agatha if she tried. On her way out, Mom handed Agatha a steaming bowl of dew tea, which she slurped down quickly. She set the hollow pinecone cup next to her stool when she began work. Just as she entered the small building, she saw Cassidy leaving, and there was a fresh bag of fairy dust. Agatha wasted no time. She grabbed a pouch, careful not to tear it in case she was being a bit hasty with her hands, and filled it with powder. In less than a minute, five pouches were down the chute, in the basement.

            “Wow!I can’t believe I’ve already five pouches done, in less than a minute, without tearing any, and it’s only my first day!” she exclaimed out loud. She was at ease by the time she was an hour into work. By two hours, Cassidy had dropped off another bag of fairy dust, but when Agatha opened her mouth to speak, Cassidy whirled around and raced back to her station. Jeez, that girl is speedy! Agatha thought, maybe a bit wearily. Already she was beginning to have doubts about making friends with Cassidy. But she couldn’t think about that now; she had just torn her first pouch. Agatha did just about everything in her own power to hold back tears. What had Natasha said about torn pouches . . . For Creator’s Sake, she didn’t say a single word about it! Now Agatha couldn’t stop crying. She held her head in her hands and wiped her eyes with the tails on her headband. Slowly, Cassidy approached Agatha, careful not to upset her any more than she already was.

            “Was I really crying that loud?” Agatha asked, hearing Cassidy and looking up. Cassidy seemed to flinch for a moment--obviously she wasn’t used to making conversation, let alone consoling another fairy--but she walked close to Agatha instead of backing up.

            “Agatha, it’s no use crying over spilled honey,” she whispered, gripping Agatha’s hands with the chilling ones of her own. She eyed the velvet pouch. “Didn’t the last Fairy Dust Supplier, oh, what’s her name, Natasha, didn’t she tell you what to do with a torn pouch?” Agatha shook her head, sniffling.

            “Throw it down the chute. Didn’t you ever wonder who makes the pouches?” Cassidy said kindly. Now Agatha understood. Cassidy made the pouches. How could you not have known that? Agatha wondered to herself?

            “But then someone else won’t get their fairy dust because I won’t have a pouch for them!” Once again, Agatha was on the verge of crying.

              But Cassidy refused to let that happen. She said, “Agatha, look at me. I make extra pouches. That’s what Lydia, the old Fairy Dust Creator, and pouch creator, told me to do. She says it happens all the time. Don’t worry about it, Agatha.” And Cassidy was off, back to work. Agatha smiled mysteriously. Her tears had just made friends with Cassidy.

            The rest of the day went fine. After Agatha got over the pouch incident, she was fine. She even flew home with Cassidy. When Ida caught up with Agatha, she seemed surprised that someone else was flying with Agatha--lucky she’s not the jealous type!

            “How was your day?” Ida asked, flying on Agatha’s right side with Cassidy on her left. Agatha and Cassidy exchanged a knowing look.

            “Well, let’s just say that sometimes work takes getting used to.” And Ida understood that it was not her place to ask what went on that day. “Well, I hope you had fun,” she said, dropping down to her house below. Cassidy had to go to, for her house was not far away from Ida’s.

            “Can we fly together to work tomorrow?” Cassidy asked hopefully, smiling the tiniest bit. Agatha nodded. She wanted that more than anything.

Your story is cool, Rachel! :)

1) Did U enjoy that story so far? Yes!

2) Would you like me to post more? Yep

3) Do u think I'm a good writer? Yes

4) What is ur fave genre? Fantasy, Fiction & Historical Fiction

5) Anything I should change? Nope

6) Extra comments...

1) Did u enjoy that story so far? Yes, I did.

2) Would you like me 2 post more? Sure, go right ahead –I am interested in seeing what happens.

3) Do u think I'm a good writer? Yeah, I think so.

4) What is ur fave genre? Fantasy and sci-fi tie for first place.

5) Anything I should change? See no. six, where I go into detail on what I thought.

6) Extra comments--- [post comments here] I quite liked this. Especially the character of Natasha, though all of it is well written. But I do have a few questions and concerns. Actually, I am going to criticize quite a lot, so if you are especially sensitive to crit, I would stop reading now.

First of all, I have to admit that I skimmed over the list at the beginning. Is it really imperative that I know before I start reading that Agatha Powder is the fairy dust supplier? You tell me that anyway in the first paragraph! (And you could have just told her last name by saying it in the first sentence instead of just saying her first name.) As to the other charries – introduce them when you come to them! I forget what author it was that said that he tried to leave out the parts that people tended to skip, but it’s a good rule, and this is something I would skip.

Second: What exactly do these fairies use fairy dust for? That is something you should tell us. I know that fairy dust is used in certain books for flying, but this is your world, and you make the rules, and if it is different then I want to know. And, if it is the same, then you should not assume that your readers will realise this. Never assume anything.

Third: Why do fairies have to retire so early? They work for one year only? Why? The only explanation I can come up with for this is that they have shorter life spans, and therefore two years old = retirement age? Or do fairies have a different calendar, so that a fairy year is longer than a human one? Explanations please!

Fourth (& this is last, I promise): After reading in Chap. 2 that Natasha told Agatha that five fairies did not need fairy dust, I said “Huh?” and went back to Chap. 1. And maybe I’m missing something really obvious, but I combed through Chap. 1, but I could not find any place where Natasha said that. Now, we know Agatha can’t be lying, because a) she was thinking about it before she was called up, and b) Natasha immediately admitted to it. So why didn’t you put that in the dialogue? It would have made so much sense, eliminating much confusion.

***

So, that’s my take on it, and I am really honestly sorry if I was too harsh or if what I said hurt your feelings. I really do want to hear more of your story. 

 The next part of my story.... enjoy, ppl!!!! :)

When she got home, Mom was lying on the maple leaf bed, her face pale. There was a wet leaf scrap cloth on her forehead.

            “What happened?” Agatha asked, perching on the edge of the bed.

            “Fever. . . might have eaten something bad . . . I’m sick . . .” Mom murmured, only her lips moving. She made no attempt to sit up. Agatha was very worried.

            “Mom, can you sit up?” she said, placing her hand on her mother’s forehead. Mom was burning up.

            “Can’t. . . too tired . . . gotta sleep . . .” Mom was quieter this time, and her voice was fading rapidly. This was not a good sign.

            “Mom, I’m going to get the doctor!” she called over her shoulder, flying hurriedly to Gabby Sick’s house.

            “Gabby, my mother’s ill!” she yelled, panting. “She has a really high fever, and she says she might have eaten something bad and . . .” Gabby placed her hand on Agatha’s shoulder.

            “Don’t worry, Agatha,” she said. “She’s not in critical condition, is she?” Agatha shook her head and calmed down a bit, though her heart was still racing. “Well then, we’ll just go over there right now and give her a check-up and a cotton pellet to lower her fever, okay?” Again Agatha nodded, and the two set off for the house, wings waving in the wind.

Chapter Four

“I’m afraid she’s not quite as well as I thought.”Gabby murmured, placing her skinny arm around Agatha’s shoulder. “You’re mother has Marmarmi disease. Fairies are the only creatures prone to getting it.” Agatha went pale.

            “What’s Marmarmi disease?” she asked, slumping on the pebble. Gabby hesitated for a moment and that was when Agatha knew that this wasn’t good.

            “Marmarmi disease means that a fairy will get weaker and weaker, and then suddenly be well again.” Gabby said.

            “So it’s just temporary, and it won’t hurt her?” Agatha’s lip trembled, waiting for the answer with hope glittering in her eyes. But Gabby couldn’t deny the truth.

            “I’m so sorry, Agatha.” She scuffled her feet. “While it will seem like she is well again, that is not the case. In the Doctor’s Records, it says that every victim in history that has gotten Marmarmi disease has died. But Marmarmi disease is very rare. I’m so sorry . . .” Gabby trailed off, and the tears that slipped down Agatha’s cheeks were warm.

            “There’s no cure, is there?” she whispered quietly, getting up to lean over her mother. Gabby shook her head. “Well, how long will she live?” Now Gabby began to cry silent tears, also.

            “Your mom will live for three days to a week at most . . . And we thought that she wasn’t in critical condition- I’m so sorry.” And Gabby flew off, tear droplets floating to the ground every couple seconds. Agatha couldn’t hold it in any longer. She began to sob, crying so much that she was afraid she would flood her house.

            “Mama?”she mumbled, shuddering. Mom’s eyes fluttered open slowly. Agatha cried harder just at the sight.

            “What’s wrong, Agatha?” Mom’s voice crumbled, and she looked confused. Agatha had to tell her.

            “You have a disease, Mom!” she wailed. “You’re not gonna live!” But she hushed herself, to spare the pain as much as possible. Why doesn’t she look frightened? she thought.

            As though she could read her daughter’s mind, Mom said, “I’m not afraid of dying, Agatha, and neither should you be. When Creator chooses for me to go, I’m gonna go without a fight. Please don’t cry over me.”

          Agatha wiped her eyes. “I’m gonna miss you Mama.”

            “Don’t cry, darling.”

I posted a very long comment, and it isn't here. Was it deleted? It did include criticism, although I honestly didn't think it was that harsh... Honestly, I liked the story.

I don't remember deleting any comments recently.

Admin

 The next part of my story; plz comment and I HOPE U ENJOY!!!!!

“I just can’t believe she’s gonna go with a whole ‘nother year to live.” Agatha sighed, picking at the edge of Ida’s peach-skin bedspread. (She got it when her mom went on vacation to Peach Party, a gnome city.) Ida nodded solemnly.

            “I feel terrible, Agatha,” she said. “Your mom was always so healthy!” Agatha couldn’t respond, for she knew that if she did she would cry again.

            “S-sohow’s work going?” she stammered, changing the subject. Ida looked up.

            “Oh,um- being a librarian is fun. And all the cute little fairies that are still in school and so, well- cute! They all seem to have trouble with reading, though.” Agatha wasn’t surprised.

            “We were always the only two fairies that learned how to read really fast. And, of course, that’s probably why they made you librarian.” She said. Ida giggled suddenly.

            “Remember the time that the teacher asked Ella to read a chapter in the book we were reading, and she couldn’t even begin?” Agatha nodded slowly. “It’s just- I don’t know- weird!”

            Ida’s mom came into her daughter’s bedroom (their house was bigger than Agatha’s so they had separated rooms) with a tray of tulip petal cookies. Agatha’s mouth watered- she realized that she hadn’t eaten a single thing at all in the last four hours. Ida snatched one and chomped on it, savoring the delicious flavor. Agatha managed the tragedy bound to happen in her life and giggled.

            “Hey, save some for me!” she cried gleefully and plunged in to enjoy one or two cookies herself. Ida’s mom leaned on the doorway, watching the two best friends having fun. And finally, Agatha was so happy that she didn’t even notice Ida’s mom watching.

            Cassidy was waiting outside her house the minute Agatha arrived. They held hands as they flew, laughing and chatting- and then Agatha remembered.

            “Cassidy, I have some, uh, big news.” Agatha said, looking at her golden-silk slippers. Cassidy looked up, worry creasing her face with small wrinkles. The sun shined on Agatha’s rosy cheeks and for a moment Agatha could not say anything at all, but finally she recovered. “My mom is gonna die.” Cassidy practically fell to the ground.

            “Oh my goodness, Agatha, I’m so sorry!” she squeaked, watching Agatha’s face. Once again, Agatha began to cry. I’m just so weak I can’t hold back tears! she thought numbly, flitting her wings just enough to stay up.