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Boredom/Ovalt
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Boredom/Ovalt
Boredom/Ovaltine: A very serious essay
There are several different opinions on boredom.
If you ask a baby what their opinion is on boredom, they will likely stare at you.
If you ask a child their opinion on boredom, they will likely tell you that BEING BORED IS THE WORST AND I WANT TO DO SOMETHING FUN.
If you ask an intellectual their opinion on boredom, they will likely tell you that Boredom Is The Mother Of Invention And Without It The World Would blah blah blah.
If you ask me what my opinion on boredom is, I will tell you that boredom is great because it means you don’t have any work to do and can instead spend an afternoon writing about OVALTINE.
Because Ovaltine is awesome.
When I was six, I saw a can of Ovaltine for the first time. At first I didn’t care that much, but I was WRONG.
It’s like chocolate milk- except you get to MAKE IT.
It’s like hot chocolate- except it’s COLD.
It’s like instant Gatorade- except it’s CHOCOLATE. Best. Thing. Ever.
And then- there's the logo. Oh my gandalf.
Google the ovaltine logo. The entire thing- IS AN OVAL.
*gasp*
And look at the thing under the word "ovaltine". IT'S THE TINE OF A FORK.
*gasp*
Oval-tine!
I LOVE HIDDEN MEANINGS IN LOGOS GAAAGBOABFOVDPNSLVIYP*
*The above word is pronounced (GAHG-bobe-fod-ehv-penCIL-VEE-ip).
The best part is stirring the brown dust into milk so it becomes suspended in the liquid. Oh, wait, that’s the only part. Besides drinking it.
~>{THE END}<~
submitted by Alizarine, age unknown, whereabouts uninteresting
(September 3, 2018 - 7:21 am)
(September 3, 2018 - 7:21 am)
What the heck is this?
Comedy. Gold.
(September 3, 2018 - 10:31 am)
(September 3, 2018 - 4:27 pm)
GAHG- bobe- fod- ehv- penCIL- VEE- ip. Excellent. Could be improved with a QUAZONKoxlSHMOOP, though, if you know what I mean.
Um, no, I don't.
Then you shall be condemned to live in an Ovaltine container for the rest of your days.
*Sage, please don't threaten to put Lev in an Ovaltine container.*
I don't know what's happening, but it's making me laugh!
(Trzp)
*Submit* (sorry you have to read my nonsense, Admins.)
(September 3, 2018 - 4:43 pm)
I??? Love??? This??? This is like, incredibly genius.
(September 3, 2018 - 6:29 pm)
That literally just made my day XD
(September 3, 2018 - 6:58 pm)
I love it! Sadly, my family doesn't usually keep ovaltine around anymore, but I can still remember the beautiful taste of it.
(September 3, 2018 - 8:32 pm)
Seriously, Alizarine, your comedic writing is so good. This is awesome. XD
(September 3, 2018 - 9:07 pm)
I'm cracking up. This is amazing, just amazing. GAAAGBOABFOVDPNSLVIYP!
(September 4, 2018 - 2:41 pm)
So it's pretty much Nesquik then? But it only comes in chocolate?
If you look up Ovaltine, it says the original flavor was malt. So I think the chocolate is chocoalte malt flavor, and Nesquik is just chocolate without the malt.
Admin
(September 4, 2018 - 7:36 pm)
Thank you all! XD
(September 4, 2018 - 7:48 pm)
This is beautiful. XD *looks up Ovaltine*
GAAAGBOABFOVDPNSLVIYP
WHAT. IT’S CHOCOLATE. AND MALT. AND THE LOGO. AAAAHHH. MY LIFE IS CHANGED.
And now I have to try it.
(September 5, 2018 - 9:28 am)
You had me at chocolate.
tobx
*attempting to stuff Mor in a box*
HARLI NO *attempting to drag him away from Mor*
*doing nothing to help* *laughing her butt off*
(September 5, 2018 - 12:56 pm)
That was quite possibly the best thing I've read all day. Have you ever tried stand up comedy, Alizarine? I feel like you'd be good at it. Thank you for this amazingness!
(September 6, 2018 - 8:57 pm)
That. Is. Amazing. It's honestly is one of the highlights of my day now. And what Cockleburr said- I think you could be amazing at stand up comedy! :) ;)
I have no words. It's amazing. I just... *grins and thumps chest* Mmm. Byooteeful.
*still trying to overcome giggles* That- made- my day...! *bursts out laughing again*
I don't like to admit it, because of someone present from whom I would hear no end of it... but I very much enjoyed that.
~Yeah. Me too.~
Eclipse...?
~*a little sharply* Yes? Is there a problem?~
Er- no, you just...
~Talked? *a little sarcastically* Yes, I talked.~
And I didn't have to implore you- never mind. Thanks.
WHOA, this is groundbrea-
Yes, yes. We don't need to go into the banter, for many reasons.
*dahh.*
See? Azkiel agrees. Sorry 'bout my wild AE's! Aspen, out. *clicks submit*
(September 7, 2018 - 6:10 pm)
Oh my goodness, this is hilarious. This is just - so good! I clicked on this because it ha the word 'Bored' at the beginning of it, thinking that it was some kind of poem about it? Ive found something much better.
Have you ever considered creating an ad for it? 'Alizarine, Stand-Up comedy for Sit-Down people'
I have found a hidden messege in the logo. Look here, where it says 'Otak Otot Oke!' IT MUST BE A CODE! WITH 'OVALTINE' AS THE KEYWORD!
Or, like, it's in a different language. I mean, there's a slim chance it is.
(September 7, 2018 - 5:57 pm)