Chatterbox: Inkwell

So I'm working on a super complicated story at the moment... and I would like some critique from anyone who can give it. I've put some excerpts in Neko's thread, but that's all out of context.

Here goes!

There is a kingdom (which doesn't have a name yet whoops) ruled over by an empress. Her niece has twin children and probably other relatives I haven't really built character for yet, and basically the whole court is served by highly trained swordsmen and swordswomen. One day, the empress goes missing and the weaponry is raided in the middle of the night, and later, a figure is seen running out of the capital city carrying a large brown bag. The news gets out that the empress had been kidnapped and for the moment, her niece is in power. However, the twins had watched the empress the night before as she put on mens clothing and armor and then stuffed a sack with weapons. They know that for some reason or another, the empress faked her own kidnapping. They make it their mission to find out more about what happened and why, so they run off both carrying the ceremonial daggers on the mantelplace of their mother's room.

Later, news gets out that the empress had been kidnapped not by a neighboring kingdom but by a rising warlord who seems to have his own army. The twins are realizing that the warlord is the empress, and then split up to spread the news.

Meanwhile, a swordsmaster and his apprentice disguise themselves as the warlord's soldiers and take up residence in his/her fortress. The swordsmaster then manages to climb his way up next to the warlord/empress as his/her most trusted advisor.

Elsewhere, the male twin is captured by the warlord/empress's soldiers and later executed, while the female twin is unaware and still alive.

Back in the fortress, the Swordsmaster decides to assasinate the warlord, unaware that he is actually the empress. When the warlord pretends to be killed and lets her mask fly off, the Swordsmaster thinks he killed his empress. Ashamed of his betrayal, he runs off and then falls into the large fire kept buring into the main room, but not before leaving his apprentice a message in code. The empress checks to see if her scheme went as planned and returns to her room with her mask back on.

The apprentice finds the note and then realizes what had happened. When he realizes that the empress is still alive, he runs off and then later crosses paths the female twin and the two set off to find her brother (who is dead) and then warn the rest of the kingdom.

I'll update the storyline as I keep developing it, and critique and suggestions are much appreciated!