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TAKE WING!I
TAKE WING!
I know that several of you are on the NaNoWriMo Young Writers site. I wanted to share the story I'm writing on it with you all. (It's also on the Critiques and Novel Feedback" forum.) I know that you will never judge me or make fun of me. And I also know that even if nobody ever reads this story, I will have at least posted it here. I've also included a short section of it here, and a form from NaNo that tells you a little bit about it.
Length: 8,000 words so far, but more every day!
Language: English
Brief Summary: A teenage orphaned girl, Zoey, discovers her heroic destiny in a far-off land populated with dragons, Fae, unicorns, and so much more. But the more time she spends here, the more she realizes that not everything is as it seems. An evil is rising, and only she can stop it.
Known issues: Not everything makes as much sense on paper as it does in my head...
Critique would be much appreciated! While I do like all the "oh yeah it's great keep doing that", I also want honest feedback. If you think something could be improved upon, let me know!
This is an excerpt from the first chapter. There's also a prologue and several more chapters. If anyone posts that they're interested in reading the rest, I'll post it.
And the prince and the princess lived happily ever after. The End.
I sigh happily and close the book of fairy tales. I’ve always liked them. Fairy tales always end well-- even if my story doesn’t.
Case in point: middle school gym class.
I’ve been “excused” from “physical activity” because I’m, apparently, “malnourished”. That’s a fancy way of saying that all the rich parents of the rich kids at the oh-so-fancy Northbrook Academy don’t want me messing up their kids’ PE class.
I’m the charity case here at Northbrook, picked up out of the orphanage a year and a half ago. I’ve been here ever since. They want me here to show how “kind” and “generous” they are, by allowing a nobody like me to have an education as good as people like them.
Or so I’m told, only about, oh, one million or so times a day.
“Hey, charity case!” one of the other students calls as a ball rolls to a stop on the floor beside me. “Throw back the ball!”
I roll my eyes, and for a second I consider ignoring him, just out of spite.
“Fine,” I call back, and kick it vaguely in his direction. It lands at the feet of the most popular girl in the school, Shaina Wintermere. She cringes back.
“Eww! I don’t want to touch it now! The charity case touched it!” she shrieks. The class laughs, and some shoot me dirty looks-- apparently just for existing.
Shaina’s boyfriend, Justin Glendale, runs over to her.
“Kick it here,” he says, holding out his hands to catch it. The students are playing some sort of game that involves both kicking and catching.
Shaina half-heartedly nudges the ball with her toe, and he picks it up.
Justin nods at me. “Thanks,” he says, then runs back into the thick of the game.
I think the humid gym air must have muddled my malnourished brain. The most popular boy in school can’t have just looked at me, much less thanked me. I decide it’s a hallucination brought on by too many fairy tales.
By the time gym ends, I have re-read half the book of fairy tales, and the ball hasn’t rolled back over here once. When the bell rings and all the students pour out the door of the locker room, I stand up and stretch. My academy uniform-- a black pleated skirt, white collared top, and a blue tie-- is slightly too large for me, and it’s gotten all wrinkled from the folded position I’ve been in the last few hours.
I hear Shaina and her followers snicker as they pass me, their perfectly-fitting uniforms looking like they just came out of the bag. I tug self-consciously at my own uniform.
As I’m leaving the gym after the other kids, a hand lands on my shoulder. I whip around. It’s… Justin?
He falters when he sees my angry expression. That anger isn’t directed at him, exactly-- more like at Northbrook as a whole.
“I just wanted… to… um, to thank you, I guess,” he says, hesitating. “For, um, kicking that ball towards me.”
I snort. “You make it sound like some life-changing event. I kicked a ball. End of story. You’re welcome.”
Justin nods. “And, um…” Now he seems just flat-out uncomfortable. I raise an eyebrow.
“I’m sorry, I don’t think I know your name,” he blurts out, then stares at his shoes.
I shrug. “Charity case. That’s what all of you call me, isn’t it?”
I start walking away. I’ll be late if I stay talking much longer.
“I’m sorry about that,” he says, and I turn slightly over my shoulder.
“What?” I ask.
Justin looks up from his inspection of his shoes to meet my eyes. He takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry for calling you a charity case all this time. It was really mean.”
He sticks out his hand. “Justin,” he says.
“I know,” I say. “Zoey.”
Then I turn and walk away, to Ms. Muiller’s English-Language Arts class.
I hope that shows up correctly... it might not. Oh well.
~Starseeker
submitted by Starseeker, age 156 moons, Enterprise
(September 6, 2017 - 5:53 pm)
(September 6, 2017 - 5:53 pm)
Ahh, thank you! I'm planning on self publishing, and my goal is to get it completely edited and out by the end of 2019.
~Starseeker
(February 19, 2019 - 9:46 pm)
Only one more update after this! I think I'll also post some fanart I've received/made, and start talking about publishing and open a huge Q & A for the whole novel. Ah, and also-- these last two chapters are a little... darker? So read at your own discretion. (Nothing inappropriate for the CB, though.)
~~~
The girl who looks like Sterling-- exactly like Sterling-- leans forward, frowning. “My name isn’t Sterling,” she says. “It’s Silvyre.” She laughs, and it’s then I know she’s not Sterling. Her-- Silvyre’s-- laugh tinkles like fairy bells, while Sterling’s is rough and deep. And as she leans forward, I can see the wings on her back-- great big white ones, drooping over the back of her chair. The chair has holes in the back of it, apparently just for that purpose-- makes sense, I suppose, for a world in which everyone seems to have wings.
“That’s not the point,” Seeker Avarice interrupts, something she seems to be fond of doing. “The point is the Carapace.”
“Ooh, the Carapace?” Silvyre says, her eyes widening. “Where is it?”
Seeker Avarice sighs. “That’s the problem. The girl has it.”
“Which one?” Silvyre says, leaning back in her chair. “There are a lot.”
“The one I’m holding right now,” Seeker Avarice says through gritted teeth. “The mortal.”
“She’s a mortal girl?” Silvyre says in surprise. “But she’s so… sparkly.”
“She is a mortal,” Seeker Avarice says tiredly. “No matter how… sparkly… she may seem.”
Silvyre tilts her head. “If you say so,” she says. “But she is awfully sparkly.”
“Yes, she is a mortal,” Seeker Avarice says after a long pause. “And that’s the problem.”
“Problem?” Silvyre says, examining her pale pink nails. Seeker Avarice inhales, then exhales slowly.
“Yes, a problem. She has the Carapace.” Seeker Avarice says.
“The Carapace?” Silvyre says. “Why didn’t you say so?”
Seeker Avarice scowls. “I did.”
Silvyre waves her hand. “Well, maybe you did, maybe you didn’t. Pish posh. What’s the big deal? So she has the Carapace. It’s been found, and that’s what matters, right?” She goes back to looking at her nails as if the problem has been solved.
“She is a mortal!” Seeker Avarice roars, finally losing her patience. Silvyre blinks. “And mortals cannot wield the sacred weapon of the Elites.”
“Then make her give the Carapace to an Elite,” Silvyre says. “Done.”
“Already tried that,” Seeker Avarice breaks in. “It cannot, will not, be given away.”
Silvyre scratches her head. “Then what are we going to do?” she asks.
Seeker Avarice pinches the bridge of her nose with the hand not holding on to my arm. “That’s what I came here to ask you,” she says quietly and with restraint. “Since you are the leader.”
Silvyre pouts. “Only because Mother passed on. I don’t really want to be.” She kicks her feet up.
“Even so,” Seeker Avarice continues, “You are the leader. So you must decide what to do about this mortal.”
Silvyre’s frown deepens. “I don’t know,” she says. “What do you think?”
“I think we should get rid of her,” Seeker Avarice says. “With her out of the way, the Carapace will have to choose another Bearer.”
Silvyre and I blanch. “You mean, kill her?” Silvyre asks, and Seeker Avarice nods grimly, sizing me up. I swallow nervously.
“I don’t like killing,” Silvyre says mournfully. “There’s gotta be something else.”
She taps her pale, pointed chin. Then her eyes light up and she sits bolt upright.
“I know!” She exclaims. “If the problem is that she’s a mortal, then we’ll fix that! We’ll make her an Elite.”
Seeker Avarice sputters while I snap my head up with surprise.
“You mean-- a winged person?” I blurt. “Like you?”
Silvyre titters. “Not like me. I was born with wings. You’d have to be Fitted, of course.”
“But that is simply out of the question,” Seeker Avarice buts in, her voice finally recovered. “A mere mortal cannot simply skip the training and the testing and just… become an Elite! We are called the Elites for a reason!”
“But, as you pointed out,” Silvyre says smugly, “I am the Leader. Which means that I make the decisions. And since the problem is her mortality, we fix that problem.”
“But--” Seeker Avarice starts, but as Silvyre raises a slender hand she quiets.
“My word is final,” Silvyre says quietly and threateningly. “Are you questioning me?”
Seeker Avarice hesitates. “No, but it’s just that she may not survive the process--”
“Do it. Either way we gain the Carapace. And if she dies, it isn’t my fault, so I didn't kill her.”
I blanch. Seeker Avarice bows and then tightens her hold on my arm. She starts to drag me out of the room but I dig my heels into the marble floor.
“Wait!” I yell at Silvyre. She looks up disinterestedly from her nails.
“What’s going to happen to me?” I ask despairingly.
“You’re going to be Fitted,” she says calmly. “If you’re strong enough, you’ll join our ranks.”
“Fitted? What’s what?” I cry, but Silvyre waves her hand boredly and Seeker Avarice drags me out of the room. I claw at her arm but her wing sweeps in and blocks me. She drags me down a hallway, her wing muffling my cries for help, and finally to a large window. She releases her hold on my arm and pulls back her wing, and I suck in a huge breath of air, preparing to scream once more. But in a split second, she grabs me and leaps out the window. Any scream is torn out of my throat by the winds as we plummet straight down, and down, and down. The ground rushes closer and closer and against my will I cling to her, praying to anyone who will listen that she will unfurl her wings and swerve before we hit the ground. Finally Seeker Avarice does, and we sweep level, so close that I can feel grass blades against my cheek before she flaps her mighty wings and brings us higher.
I gasp as air floods back into my lungs, only to lose that air in a scream as we plummet downwards again, through a grate that she blasts open and down into a tunnel. She uses her momentum to spiral through the tunnel a ways before flapping once, twice, and bringing us to a stop. Seeker Avarice releases me and I stagger out of her arms and to the ground, my stomach heaving. Seeker Avarice grabs my upper arm impatiently and drags me to my feet. The sudden movement before I’m ready makes me throw the contents of my stomach up on her. I drop to my knees and she looks down distastefully at her splattered uniform as a woman rushes out of a door in the tunnel wall.
“I heard screaming, is everything okay?” she asks, and then her eyes land on Seeker Avarice and I. “Oh, Seeker,” she says respectfully. “I, uh… I didn’t see you there. Is everything alright?”
“Perfect,” she says in a clipped tone, adjusting her uniform. “We have a candidate ready to be Fitted.”
The woman eyes me on my knees, and then looks back at Seeker Avarice. “Her?” she asks.
“Yes,” the Seeker says, spreading her wings. “Get it done and over with. Tell me of any developments. And, don’t give her any painkillers, hmmm?”
“But Seeker--” the woman starts to argue, but when Seeker Avarice shoots her a glare, the woman falls silent. Then Seeker Avarice reaches down and grabs my chin in her hand, wrenching my head up.
“Don’t disappoint the Leader,” she growls, then stands and takes off, winging her way down the tunnel until even the sound of her wingbeats fades. The woman turns to look at me, and a flash of pity crosses her face, but is then replaced by a businessy expression.
“I haven’t seen you around before,” she says, taking my hand and helping me to my feet. “What Squadron were you in?”
“I wasn’t,” I say, turning pleading eyes on her. “Please, I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to be-- Fitted, or whatever.”
She tilts her head like a bird might, and I notice the wings on her back. They’re medium brown and round, and one looks smaller than the other. Her wings are clipped, I realize with horror.
“Having second thoughts?” she asks, ushering me inside the room. There’s only a metal table and I dig in my heels at the sight of it, but she pulls me to it like my resistance is nothing. She forces me back onto the table and onto my stomach, cuffing my arms and legs so I won’t resist. She continues speaking this whole time, despite my futile struggling.
“It’s not very common to have second thoughts, but it does happen,” she says mildly. “I can help you sleep during the procedure, if that would help.” She frowns as she finishes tightening my restraints. “Seeker said no painkillers, though. Never mind.”
“Please,” I beg her, sobbing. “Please. They want something from me, something I can’t give them. That’s why they’re doing this! Please, if you let me go I’ll never tell it was you, you can say I escaped and--”
“I’m under direct orders,” she says, cutting me off. “If I disobey, the Seekers will come after me. At least this way, my family can be safe. You wouldn’t want my family to be hurt, now would you? It’s my family or this procedure.”
“Well, no, I don’t want them to hurt your family--” I start, and then the cuffs around my arms and legs start to burn and I scream.
“There’s that, all wrapped up,” the woman says in satisfaction, going out of my view. I hear a door open and then her voice comes again, but farther. “I can’t legally Fit you without your consent-- and since you just said you didn’t want my family hurt, that means you’d rather have the opposite, which is being Fit.”
“That’s not what I meant!” I scream. “No, I do not consent!”
“That’s not how it works, darling,” the woman says remorsefully. “Once consent is given, it cannot be taken away.” I hear footsteps and then her feet come back into my view, skewed as it is from lying on my stomach. She grunts and then a weight is placed on my back. It’s heavy, but not unpleasant; it feels almost… furry?
“Wings,” the woman says, almost in answer to my thoughts. “You’re being Fitted for wings.”
“I don’t want wings!” I shout, squirming as best I can. “I want to go home!”
“Settle down, now,” the woman chides. “This’ll be much harder on both of us if you struggle.”
“No!” I scream. “I won’t let you do this!”
“I’m afraid you don’t have a choice,” the woman says, placing her hands on my back. I feel her fingers lengthen and harden, and then something that feels like claws is pricking through my shirt. She traces her fingers-- claws-- whatever-- down my back, and with a soft rip! My shirt falls open and my back is exposed.
“Let’s get started, shall we?” the woman purrs, and digs her claws into me.
~~~
I would say "enjoy!" but this is a rather unenjoyable chapter, so... have fun waiting until Friday I guess?
~Starseeker
(February 19, 2019 - 5:25 pm)
Ooh, I do love torture and people being operated on without their consent. :)
I noticed something that's probably a typo - she says, "Fitted? What's what?"
I'm looking forward to the next (and final?!) portion! And then you must certainly publish this.
Mm, theories about Sterling/Silvyre. Perhaps we somehow ended up in an alternate universe? Yes, that seems very likely. Perhaps the winged people put a spell so that if anyone touched the Carapace, it would go to them.
(February 19, 2019 - 7:20 pm)
Wellllll, technically Zoey did give consent, she just didn't want to.
Yep, that's a typo! At this point I had like 5 minutes left of class and was hurrying to finish. Thanks for pointing that out-- I just fixed it!
I will definitely self-publish! My goal on that is to get it out by the end of 2019. (And technically Friday's chapter will be the last chapter, but I'm also going to post a teaser for the sequel on Tuesday, so.)
Alas, those theories are untrue. I like the AU one though-- it would be totally possible, what with the way I have this fantasy world set up. At this point, though, I can just say that the whole Sterling/Silvyre thing is mostly a coincidence. I think I might even take it out. And the Carapace has been lost for... I dunno, a while? You notice how the winged people (they're called Elites, by the way; but no judgment here since there's a lot of names in my novel) said that Zoey was "mortal" and that was a problem? That sort of implies that they're immortal. Later I think it was Seeker Avarice that mentioned training and such, and the surgeon that asked about Zoey's Squadron. Those are all kinda little clues as to who these people are, which... doesn't clear things up at all. Oops. Okay, so when I do my little closing bit/special episode/sequel teaser next Tuesday, remind me (and I'll try to remember, too) and I'll explain all about the Elites. It's nothing that you wouldn't find out in the sequel, but hoenstly? I don't know if the sequel is ever going to happen in my high school career, because it's gotten insanely busy and I just... then I'll be in college soon and GAH It's overwhelming to think about. So. Tell me your opinion: should I fill you in on the sequel on Tuesday, so that you can be satisfied and not be left with a cliffhanger for the rest of your life? Or should we/you hope that I can get this sequel pulled out in the next 4 years or so?
~Starseeker
(February 19, 2019 - 9:57 pm)
Definitely fill us in on the sequel. I have no inclination to be left with a cliffhanger for the rest of my life. And, if you do get the sequel written, I'll still read it and still find it good, so no problem there.
Oh, uh, are the Elites angels?
(February 20, 2019 - 12:24 pm)
Oooh... my theory about Sterling/Silvyre is that Silvyre is the daughter of one of Sterling/Zoey's older sisters... I remember in an eariler part you talked about the royal family and how there were multiple siblings?
(February 19, 2019 - 9:52 pm)
Eeek! Eek eek eek!
That's literally what I said outloud after I first read that. O.O But ohhhhhh now it all makes sense!! Everything! That's how Zoey gets her wings! Wow! It's! Just! Like! Mind! Blown! After finishing that section!
Wow.
But jeez Star, you sure know how to kill a person via death by dramatic cliffhanger. But at least there's the epliogue (andcoughcoughshortstorysequalmaybecoughcough). XD Speaking of which... the epilogue gives me the feels because ahh my little cinnamon roll Jasak is so saaaad. D:
(February 24, 2019 - 4:05 pm)
Okay, I will fill you in on the sequel. I'll try typing up a synopsis tonight, so maybe I can get something coherent and clear. Maybe I can even write it as a little short story thing... hmm. (Possibilities!)
Angels... yes? Kinda? More like Valkyries, if you know what they are. I'll explain more in the Tuesday update, but basically, yes.
Nice theory! There are multiple siblings, yes, but none old enough to have a daughter Sterling's age. Each of the sisters (and Zoey's twin) are separated by two years; so when Zoey and her twin, Zorinth, were nine (and that's when the palace got taken over, yada yada), Sterling was eleven, and the oldest sibline (Adrienne? Adriana? Aurielle? Ariadne? Working on it) was thirteen. So, sadly not a child. No relation to the Griffon royal family; just a freaky coincidence for suspense.
~Starseeker
(February 20, 2019 - 9:44 pm)
Valkyries? Weren't those the angel-things in Magnus Chase?
*quickly Googles Valkyries*
"In Norse mythology, a valkyrie (/vælˈkɪəri, -ˈkaɪri, vɑːl-, ˈvælkəri/; from Old Norse valkyrja "chooser of the slain") is one of a host of female figures who choose those who may die in battle and those who may live."
Okay, yes, I think?
(February 21, 2019 - 1:17 pm)
More or less, that's the Elites. But they choose from among a selection of the living. You know what, I'll just add that onto my list of things to explain on Tuesday.
~Starseeker
(February 21, 2019 - 6:58 pm)
Last official novel update, guys. Exciting!!
~~~
Epilogue
“Alright, you’re good?” Maylene asks, patting Jasak on the shoulder. He nods, his hair flopping back into his face.
It’s gotten longer, Maylene notices. He’s not kept it up. His beard, too, is starting to grow in, the faint outline of stubble on his cheeks and chin.
“Hey, we’ll find her,” Maylene assures him. Jasak nods, not looking at her, and fingers something in his bandaged hand. Maylene catches a glimpse of gold and smiles sympathetically.
“Still clutching that scale, huh?” Maylene asks, and Jasak nods for a third time. He hasn’t done much but nod lately, Maylene thinks. She feels a pang of sorrow for the teenager he used to be, and the man he is now.
“It’s all I have left,” Jasak says quietly.
Maylene smiles sympathetically and reaches out to pat Jasak on the shoulder again. But just then the door to her cabin bangs open. Sterling stands in the open doorway, panting and looking like a wild creature.
“Sterling?” Maylene says, stepping away from Jasak and frowning worriedly. “You alright?”
“Help me,” Sterling whispers. She drops to her knees and holds her hands over her ears. Maylene steps forward to help but Jasak is already there, on his knees beside her.
“Sterling?” Jasak says, shaking her just a little. Sterling looks up at him with pleading eyes.
“I can hear it,” she says despairingly.
“Hear what?” Maylene prompts her gently.
“Screaming,” Sterling says, a tear dropping out of her eye. “Her screaming.”
“Whose screaming?” Jasak says, almost not getting the words out. With a sinking feeling, Maylene realizes who she means.
Sterling looks up through her tears. “My sister’s. Zoey’s.”
Jasak freezes, hand halfway out to comfort Sterling. Maylene reaches out to him but hesitates as he slowly, so slowly, looks up at Maylene.
“We are getting her back,” he vows. “Now.”
~~~
Yeah! So! Fun epilogue!
A few things to cover...
1. This Tuesday, I'll be doing a huge Q and A type thing. I'd recommend re-reading the whole thing so you can ask as many questions as you need. I'd also recommend posting those questions before Tuesday, so that I have time to come up with a neat, logical answer. No holds barred, no spoilers too spoilery-- ask away! Maybe some of them will even help with editing! I'll also explain the Elites to the best of my ability. I'll also be posting publishing details and timeframe, as well as fan art I've created (sadly have not received much, though). (Is it still fan art if I made it...? Oh well.)
2. This coming Friday (not tomorrow), I'll (hopefully) be posting the sequel in the form of a short story. if you've ever seen How I Met Your Mother, the format will be similar to that. Then I'll do my usual round of answering questions-- I'm trying to make the synopsis as complete and entertaining as possible, while still being complete. I'll probably be skipping a lot of transition stuff, but I'll try my best to make it complete!
3. Just wanted to say that I appreciate everyone who has been on this journey with me so, so much! You all kept me writing and posting even when I felt like giving up. I am so thankful for you and I'm adding a page to my novel to show my thanks and thanks every single one of you. <3 (might upload Tuesday?)
~Starseeker
(February 21, 2019 - 7:09 pm)
I'm terribly excited that the epilogue is posted! It's really good!
Okay, now I have a preliminary batch of questions and suggestions for you.
- Is that weird rage-y-red-black-guts thing going to come back? If not, are you going to take it out?
- Why does Zoey have golden blood?
- So, you're taking out the prophecy. Why, then, do the dragons pick her up?
- If you're taking out the prophecy, I assume you're also taking out the prologue. So, then, I had a suggestion that you're completely free to ignore, but here it is anyway. If you could take the first few chapters (where Zoey is at school) and somehow combine them into one coherent chapter which would become the prologue, it might make the transition between that and the dragons less... rushed, or odd, or whatever.
- Are you taking out the prophecy? I am having a really hard time remembering. :) If you aren't, where are the other two people going to come in?
- On further thought about the prologue, I remember that I'm not actually a huge fan of prologues (comes from a writing podcast I used to listen to before it ended where he was strongly against prologues), so perhaps you could cut that bit entirely and work it in later as backstory. Or, possibly, ignore what I'm saying entirely because at this point I'm just blabbing.
- Wasn't the Carapace supposed to be better protected?
- In the epilogue, Sterling can hear Zoey's screams. How is this happening? I'm assuming magic, but what specifically?
Uh, I think that's it for now. I'll be back with more later!
Oh! And, for fan art, I seem to remember that you had a thread a bit ago where you asked for art of the characters for your presentation in biology? That would seem to be fan art. I would offer to make some for you, but I'm not terribly good at artsy things. :)
(February 22, 2019 - 2:04 pm)
(February 25, 2019 - 8:09 pm)
Happy Tuesday! Wow, it feels really weird to not have an update for y’all today. This special episode will have 4 parts: a Q&A with all the previously unanswered questions (don’t worry, you can always ask more!), a thank-you, publishing and purchasing details, and a fanart posting. Without further ado, let’s get started!
~~~
QUESTIONS!
Welcome to my Q & A! Let’s see what questions I can answer.
- Red Rage Blood Black Death Bones Scene?: Yeah, I definitely anticipated that question! That particular scene was an attempt by my seventh grade self at foreshadowing. It was Zoey’s magical abilities coming out. I’m thinking of either a) taking out not only that scene, but her magic as a whole; or b) making it seem more common to her, and reference past experiences. Or maybe even c) making her know that weird stuff happens, and have her controlling it.
- Golden blood?: Plot hole. Definitely. I will be taking it out, once and for all. It serves no purpose. It did have a purpose in that odd alternate ending I referenced, but since the ending didn’t happen, I can take out that, and the super healing, too. It just doesn’t make sense, and it isn’t needed.
- Why do the dragons pick up Zoey in the first place?: Ah, Kitten, you have stumbled across the biggest, most gaping plot hole in the entire novel! This is one thing that I never managed to figure out. Heh… any ideas?
- Suggestion: good suggestion! I’ll see how that works with the pacing of the edited version.
- Taking out the prophecy?: yep, it’s going! I love Zoey’s story as-is, without the added distraction of two other main characters and their arcs.
- Prologue?: the prologue is going to be completely taken out. It was something that I was never happy or satisfied with, and I’m actually glad it’s going, despite the fact that I have to take out the prophecy that I worked so hard on.
- Wasn’t the Carapace supposed to be better protected?: As Feroc explained, it actually is (well, was) pretty well protected. Only someone with magic can even get into the room, and only those with good intentions can walk back out of the room. Zoey just happened to fit those specifics. And a little more about the Carapace-- it isn’t alive, exactly; but it does have some degree of sentience. It makes its own decisions, and it chose Zoey to be its wielder. That’s why none of the Elites could pick it up. It’s like Thor’s hammer, actually! But more useful, because it shifts into all sorts of different weapons.
- Sterling can hear Zoey’s screaming?: Yep, magic! But more specifically, I wrote in a little bit about how Zoey felt a string connecting her and Sterling. I think it was in the chapter when they were revealed as sisters? That “string” is actually a mental connection. That mental connection is because of a long reason which I shall now explain. When the Griffon children fled the castle, Ariadne (the eldest) had Sterling wipe Zoey’s mind of her experiences so that they could send her to Earth where she’d be safe. That memory wipe created an accidental bond between Sterling and Zoey. In the sequel, the bond is pretty much broken for a while. You’ll see when I post the short story on Friday.
~~~
THANK YOU’S!
(Here’s the pretty much word-for-word version of what’s in the back of my novel-- I took some bits out since they’re for irl people.)
Thank you to Quill and Cassandra the First, for being there for me and for just being awesome! You both are so, so wonderful!
Thank you also to Storm Windwhisperer, Leeli, Silverwaxwing, Pepper Star, Shy Peacock, Licensed Bookworm, Scylla, coyotedomino, Epic Fangirl, Doctor Who?, June, Viola?, Stargirl, Agent Winter, Fidelity, Leafpool, Satin, Tuxedo Kitten, Applejaguar, Marigold, Autumn Moon, Abigail S., MJ’s FRIEND, Admins, Pedri, LituratureRocks!, and all my other friends and family on the CB and NaNo! You are all such incredible, lovely people and I can’t ever thank you enough for all the joy you’ve given me.
Thanks to Kitten, for posting questions and encouraging comments every week when I updated. You really kept me going. Never doubt that you’re awesome, okay? <3
Thank you to Benedictus T. Eyen, Keeper of Sapient Dreams, Deconstructor of Comfortable Places to Sit, Inventor of False Cabbages, for creating my incredible covers!
Thank you to Icy, for posting incredible critique and questions. You made my novel something I can be proud of and I will be forever grateful. You rock, Icy!
Thank you to unsuspectingstrytllr/Spring Flower, for all your wonderful messages and beautiful critique! I had so much fun chatting with you on NaNo!
Thank you also to the wonderful Vyolette. Vy, I’ve had such incredible times with you, coding and sending cat gifs and virtual chocolate. Thank you so, so much for always being there for me and for providing a wonderful character in Jasak. <3
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PUBLISHING AND PURCHASING!
Alright, so, some not-so-fun stuff to take care of! My goal is to get my novel completely edited and available by the end of 2019. I was originally going to self-publish through Blurb, and set it up so that I could make anonymous sales online (since some of you have expressed interest). However, there has been a recent development that is both good and bad! My friend’s dad runs a printing company, and he offered to run me off a few copies for free. That would save me so much money (it’s about $20 to print off a single copy otherwise, and I don’t plan on charging you guys to cover the costs) and he’d even be able to use the wonderful cover that arctheuid (Sir Benedictus) on NaNo designed for me. However, this means that I can no longer anonymously sell these online. This presents a bit of an obstacle for those of you wanting a hard copy. In order for you to get a copy, I’d need your address, which isn’t really something that you should be giving out to people you’ve never met. I was trying to come up with a solution and came up with the idea of sending it to your school or your parents’ work. I’m not sure exactly how that would work, and again, it would require you giving me an address. Neither of these are preferable conditions, so I’m going to keep brainstorming for sure. Maybe I could set up a website? But then how would shipping work…? I’d still have to get your address, but then I wouldn’t know whose address it was. Hmm. Like I said, I’m still brainstorming, and @Admins I understand that the CB has rules and I’d rather not cross them. I’m not asking anyone to give me their address-- in fact, I’d rather they not!-- and I’ll try my best to come up with a solution that works for everyone and keeps their identity intact and secret.
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FANART!
Ahaha, now for some really fun stuff! This will all be my own work unless otherwise stated. Blue Moon posted some lovely fanart a few pages back, and here’s the link to some more wonderful fanart I requested for my biology project: http://www.cricketmagkids.com/chatterbox/puddingsplace/node/394581?page=1 . That’s the second page, where the first art is posted. You should really check it out-- so many amazing artists contributed their talents!
And the next few posts will include my art and a little background, if applicable.
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As always, you guys are incredible! Thank you so much for reading. :)
~Starseeker
(February 26, 2019 - 9:34 am)
Okay, moving down the list of things you discussed one by one.
- Red Rage Blood Black Death Guts - I like Zoey having magic, so I would vote for option b.
- Dragons picking up Zoey - Perhaps they- um, I think it depends on whether you're keeping the testing or editing it significantly. Perhaps they are considering getting a human to test things on and/or use as a henchman or an undercover operative in order to get them access to humans to eat? But they don't really want to eat humans. Um, maybe as an experiment to examine humans and what they're like and all that? You can ignore my blabbing of ideas. :)
- I get my own mention in the thank yous? I was so happy when I saw that! I will take your advice and never doubt that I am awesome.
- I have no ideas about how to get the books to people, seeing as none of us are going to share our addresses over the internet... Sorry!
- The cover looks amazing! Question: did you change the title? Because it definitely doesn't say Take Wing.
- Um, I think that's all. I'm really excited that this is getting close (r) to being finished!
(February 26, 2019 - 10:10 pm)