I'm writing a

Chatterbox: Inkwell

I'm writing a

I'm writing a story right now. Nobody has read the stuff I have so far yet, so I have no idea if it is good or not.

The auditorium filled with excited chatter. Luri
looked out at the crowd through the curtains, she didn’t know it, but it would
be the last time she would, for a very, long time. She heard the announcer
start the program. “Hello ladies and gentlemen! It is my pleasure to start off
this wonderful evening. First off, as you all know, Her Majesty, Queen Slenea,” he bowed deeply, “is here. Her Majesty will also be a judge for tonight’s
show.” This got a roar of approval from the crowd, and a deafening applause.

“Our first act is one many have seen before. He has won
4 first place prizes here at the festival, and nobody ever gets tired of
hearing, the one and only, Christopher Powell!” There was another applause, and
the curtains were drawn, a handsome young man standing on the stage, with a
long, delicate, blindingly beautiful, silver flute. “Thank you Jonathan! You
don’t know how pleased I am to perform in front of you, Your Majesty, it is
something I have been dreaming of all my life!” He put the flute to his lips,
and lightly blew into it. A wonderful, sweet sound filled the room. He started
a song, something that sounded, to tell the truth, inhuman. The sweetest,
truest sound. And to top it all off, he started singing. A deep, noble voice,
something you would think came from maybe an opera, or a chorus. It was very
calming. Someone could’ve fallen asleep right there and then, but to miss a
performance like that just to sleep, would be a crime.

Soon, the sweet sound came to an end. Much too
soon,
thought Luri. Going after an act like that, someone would look like
an idiot compared to him. And I am last.
She frowned at the thought. After
him, were The Swans of Crystal Lake. They danced like dainty little faeries,
swiftly, and elegantly. And after them, someone singing, and so on.

There were so many acts; Luri didn’t pay attention to any of them.
Finally, it came to the last act. Her act. She got up, brushed herself off, and
plopped her cap on. “Our final act of the night is one that has been at the
festival, ever since it started. Always last, it wrapped up show, leaving the
crowds wanting more, and questioning science, and life. It is my pleasure, to
introduce, Luri The Illusionist of Greyre!” The crowd was quiet; she could here
a small applause. She strode out onto the stage and bowed her head.
“A grand speech, Jonathan, for such a humble act!” somebody shouted, but
whoever spoke, was soon quieted by another. Luri nodded in the direction of the
speaker. “A very grand speech to start the end. A grand speech to remember
before you forget.” she spoke with authority, even though she was just a
child, from the streets of the largest city in her country, Greyre.
Luri produced a small apple from her pocket. She threw it right across the room
towards the higher box seats. She concentrated on it while it flew. It stopped
in midair, and flew right back to her. She made it fly up, to the very top of
the auditorium. Luri waved her hand, and right before the crowd’s eyes, it
turned into a bright red bird. It flew back to her. She let it go. She heard a
couple gasps from the crowd. “I would like a volunteer from the audience,” a
few tentative hands went up. “The young lady in the purple dress?” Luri called.
The lady came up the stairs at the right of the stage. “I would like you to
look at that mirror.” Luri said.
“I beg your pardon youngling, but there is no mirror,”
“Just look at it please.” The lady stared at the spot where Luri had pointed.
There was a faint glimmer, and a blurry reflection of the lady and purple dress
appeared, it got clearer and clearer. Finally, there stood a perfect replica of
the woman. Luri placed a hand on the mirror, and color started to drain from
it. A stage assistant had brought an art easel out onto the stage. Luri pointed
to it, and the color, slowly formed a picture above it, and then sunk into it.
“Wave to yourself in the mirror.” Luri instructed. The lady waved, and in the
painting, the lady waved, at the same time. This got more gasps from the crowd.
With a wave of Luri’s hand, the painting disappeared. “Ladies and Gentlemen,”
she nodded towards the woman in purple, as she left the stage, the crowd was
clapped enthusiastically. After the lady had taken her seat, Luri brought a
small string out from her pocket. She pulled it, and it became larger and
larger, longer and longer, thicker and thicker, until it was long enough to
reach the ceiling of the auditorium, with one end still touching the ground.
She threw one end of it into the air, and there, it stayed. It stood on one
end, while the other was suspended in mid-air, the string perfectly straight.
She climbed up it. So high, the crowd couldn’t see her anymore. “Where’d she
go?” she heard someone shout.
“She’s over there!” another shouted. Luri appeared in the Queen’s box. She got
down on her knees, while balancing on the balcony railing. “For you, Princess.”
she held out a large, pure white egg. The girl had a puzzled look on her face.
But, it started to get color, it had intricate designs, and colors no one had
ever seen before, what one would describe as a blue orange, and a yellow
purple, but how would that be possible? It became beautiful, sparkling like a
diamond. The Princess had a look of happiness on her face. Luri let her take it
from her hand. When the princess held it up to look at it, a small crack
appeared. A small, yellow beak cautiously moved into view. The girl gave a
squeal of delight. Soon, a small, furry creature had come all the way out. It
was like a miniature Hippogriff, with feathered wings, but the back half of it
was a bunny, and the front half a Sparrow. Luri bowed her head deeply, and
disappeared. “Ladies and Gentlemen, Luri The Illusionist Greyre!” The crowd
clapped their hands and stamped their feet loudly.

Luri looked around. She was outside, in a dark alleyway.
She knew when she made herself disappear (which she did rarely) she could end
up anywhere. Maybe a few miles away, or maybe a few hundred miles away. She
checked her surroundings, and realized it was the same exact temperature as it
had been outside of the auditorium. She probably hadn’t gone far. She could see
the castle, bright and cheery against the cold, dark winter sky. She heard the
wind howling, and the trees scraping roofs and windows.  She heard some dogs barking far away, and
saw some drunken men coming down the alley, so she set off, towards the castle.
The festival was being held at the bottom of the hill on which the castle
stood. As she was turning onto a lamp lit street, she heard a familiar voice
call out, “Luri!”. It was her friend, the silver smith. “Hello Oswald! How are
you?” Luri yelled back.

“I’ve got the staff ready for you!”

“You do?”

“Yes! Would you like to see it?” he asked. “Of course I
would,” she said as she walked toward his shop with him, “Has my master seen it
yet?” Luri asked. “No, I couldn’t find him anywhere. I even asked the landlady
where he was, and she had no idea at all.” Luri cursed under her breath.
Finally, they arrived at the smithy. “Where is it?” She asked. He motioned
toward a long, wooden table. On it, was a wooden staff, decorated with jewels.
Luri caught her breath. “It’s beautiful!” she picked it up, and saw words
engraved in silver on it. Specto
subitus
. ‘Expect the
unexpected.’

Luri stopped staring
at it, and looked up at Oswald. “Once I find him, I’ll make sure to come back
and pick it up. I don’t have your pay yet.”

“Ok than. Do you have
any idea where he might be?” Luri shrugged. Most of the time, she had no idea
where her master was. She usually found him in the forest, sitting in the high
branches of a tree.

“I will be back soon.” Luri promised the old silver smith.
She left the warm room, and walked out into the chilly night. Why would her
master leave the inn when it was so cold outside? He was not old, but anyone
sane would stay inside if they had the chance that night. She smiled to
herself. But her master wasn’t sane. The officers thought him insane,
but the townsfolk believed he was wise. He wasn’t all that insane

 

Oh great, how'd that happen?

submitted by Beatlesrockr (Archan, age 10, Illinois, The P
(September 13, 2008 - 11:58 am)

It's very nice, and very interesting, but I'm wondering if you've read all the comments on here about people stealing your work? It could happen.

submitted by Emily L., age 13, Planet Aphoondi
(September 16, 2008 - 9:03 pm)

So he chose to take a chance and trust in the inherent goodness of people (even though I don't trust you farther than I could throw you, no offense or anything)...

Personally I think the entire issue had been blown completely out of proportion - I've been posting stuff on Ye Old MuseBlog for years and no one's stolen my work, or anyone else's so far as I know. And this site seems to get way less traffic than MB. 

submitted by TNÖ, age 15, Deep Space
(September 19, 2008 - 5:33 pm)

You might be right... maybe I just have writer's paranoia.

submitted by Emily L., age 13, WA
(September 20, 2008 - 4:38 pm)

You're not alone...  I do too!

submitted by Paige P., age 12, Gorham, Maine
(September 27, 2008 - 1:12 pm)

My question is, who would want to steal that? Anyway, if someone does, I won't be able to do anything about it, will I? I really don't care about that stuff. It's a story, if someone else steals it, makes it better, and publishes it somehow I will be happy thinking that it's my work. It doesn't matter if everyone else knows, it's nice just to know yourself. Anyway, like that'll happen; it's not that good. And on here it looks a bit weird.

submitted by Beatlesrockr, age 10, Illinois, The P
(September 21, 2008 - 11:17 am)

How can you say that!  I personally thought that that snippet of writing was very well written.  You captured me from the first sentence.  I was right there, alongside Luri as she displayed her talents. Please, do me a favor.  Don't Ever put down your writing or yourself in that way.  You are an extremely talented writer. 

P.S.- Do be careful about putting your writing on the web.  There are those out there who would steal your writing.

submitted by Megan, age 13, Alagaesia
(September 27, 2008 - 1:40 pm)

That was really good! Since it's only a little bit, I don't think you should worry very much about people stealing it. I don't think there's anyone of that type on this site. (At least I hope not!) Only one thing you might want to change: You said he was playing the flute and then he started to sing.... that doesn't really seam possible; unless he sang at a different time.

submitted by Grαcε♥, age 12, SC
(October 10, 2008 - 2:58 pm)

Hm, now that I look at it, its pretty suckish. I'm writing a few other stories, my favorite is about this kid, Luri, who has many mental problems (for example, ADHD, Delerium, and depression, but those are the least of her worries), though she's still a genius. She is really rebellious and a teacher's worst nightmare. The story is about how she got through fifth grade, alive. Her teachers are worried about her particulary that year because of one 'Schizo attack' (this is what she calls her hallucinating). She started hearing voices, and seeing illusions. Soon, she was cut off from the world. Her teachers described her as 'in a coma-like state, and couldn't be waken up from it for 4 hours'.

ANYWAYS.  She hates school, and loves to annoy teachers. The only teachers she actually likes are the librarian, and her 3rd grade teacher, who she goes to every morning to talk to.

And some other stuff I forgot...

submitted by Beatlesrockr, age 10, Illinois, The P
(November 6, 2008 - 5:37 pm)