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I've been thinking
I've been thinking about starting a new book series.
I'm pretty preoccupied with Rising Tide at the moment, too, so I definitely need to finish that first, but I've just had this idea bouncing around for a while and I was wondering if it was worth continuing with. I would really appreciate your feedback! :)
Basic rundown of the plot: Fantasy. One kingdom takes up most of the world, except for one tiny one that has, for unknown reasons, been able to hold off the immense armies of the other. In the larger kingdom, there are rumors of a glass knife at the main palace. There are various, far-fetched stories tossing about as to the purpose of this knife, but the true one is that it will kill none but the one destined to overthrow the dynasty, which has gone on for over three hundred years.
In one villiage, there are three people: An elfish quarry worker named Fenrik, a healer girl named Naire, and a darin boy by the name of Sairic (a darin is half-elf, half-human) All of them are fifteen. One day a man stumbles from the woods, delerious from having eaten some toxic mushrooms. Naire and the other healers try to help him, but he's too far gone to help.
Soon, Naire notices that he keeps whispering Fenrik's name, so she sends someone to fetch him from the quarries. Fenrik comes, and the man tells him that he is the one destined to overthrow the dynasty, that the glass knife is meant for him.
I might post more later, like an excerpt or something. Just let me know if you think it's any good and if I should continue with it. I really appreciate your feedback! :):) If you think I should add something, or change a detail, I would love to hear it. Thank you!
submitted by TARDISrider, age 982, Gallifray
(July 18, 2016 - 8:51 pm)
(July 18, 2016 - 8:51 pm)
Hmm, not my type, but you are a great writer and will turn it into something amazing. Go ahead!
(July 19, 2016 - 6:46 am)
Thank you, Elmodaisy!
(July 19, 2016 - 11:30 am)
Cool! I would love to read this. It sounds very interesting. Post some excerpts!
(July 19, 2016 - 12:34 pm)
That is a super cool idea! You should totally continue with that and write a story. I would definately read that story.
(July 19, 2016 - 12:47 pm)
Thank you all! Here's the first excerpt:
I squint into the smooth water of the pond. "Do you think anyone will notice?" I ask worriedly, running a hand over the scratch on my cheek, an accident from my little brother. Fenrik sighs from the low-hanging branch of a nearby tree.
"Why d'you suppose girls care so much, Sairic?" the elf muses, running a hand through his icy-blue spikey hair. Sairic shrugs, tossing another stone across the water and rippling my reflection.
"Can't imagine," he replies lazily, blinking dark green eyes that match his curly hair. "My five-year-old sister could hardly care less."
"Ten years younger," I remind him angrily. "Besides, I don't want Calrin seeing me like this." The boys groan loudly.
"And here comes to Calrin again," Fenrik mutters, rolling his blue, cat-like eyes. "Why, Naire? Why? Just-?" He throws his hands into the air in exasperation.
"Sure, Fenrik," Sairic agrees with a smirk. "Nothing like you and Ralen, is it?" I grin up at the half-elf, grateful for his defending me. Fenrik scowls, jumping down from his branch and storming away.
"Never mind, they need me in the quarries."
"I'm sure they do!" I call after him.
"Shut up."
"Isn't Ralen helping there today?" Sairic adds.
"Shut up!"
"I believe so," I agree. "Convenient time to be needed in the quarries."
"Go hug a Cretchin, the both of you!" Fenrik snaps, reffering to a type ofspiny dragon living in the caves nearby. I laugh.
"Sure thing," I shout. "Right after you confess what we all know!"
"Shut up!" he yells. "The moment I give up that information is the moment I hear that the Glass Knife is meant for me!"
"Yeah," Sairic laughs. "Right in the moment somebody breeches the castle and finds the Glass Knife in his heart." I shake my head and skip a rock across the pond.
"Glass Knife," I mutter. "Overthrowing the dynasty; what a huge joke."
(July 19, 2016 - 2:31 pm)
Wow! Cool! You're an awsome writier, TARDISrider.
(July 20, 2016 - 7:44 am)
Thank you, Leafpool!
(July 20, 2016 - 4:54 pm)
Interesting! It sounds really good. I'd love to read an excerpt!
(July 19, 2016 - 2:39 pm)
Ooh, I love it TARDISrider! Great job!
(July 20, 2016 - 9:28 pm)
Next Excerpt:
I stand in the infirmary, sweeping the red dust of the quarry out the door. This blasted red dust settles everywhere, consequences of living near a clay quarry, where the only respectable trade is either quarry-worker or brick-maker. After the wood floors are as clean as I can get them, I turn to the rolls of bandages and begins stacking them in neat pyramids. Anything out of place, and I can freak sometimes. Sairic loves to tease me about it, which drives me crazy.
One of the new Apprentices dashes in, her hair wild and her face flushed. "There's a man coming from the woods," she gasps. "He's eaten some Devil Claw, and Madam Garen asked you to get out the medications." I turn and immediatrely begin pulling down glass bottle from the shelves and lining them up neatly on the table. Before long, Madam Garen enters, supporting a sickly and obviously poisoned man. In an even shorter time, we know he's too far gone to save.
"The poison's sunk too deep," Madam Garen whispers, rubbing her lucky coral neckalce with two fingers. "We can't save him." I take adeep breath and run a hand through my short hair, close cropped at the based of my skull. I turn to the cot on which the man lies.
"He's muttering again," I murmur.
"Go see what he asks," Madam commands. With a deep breath and alucky crossing of the fingers, I approach the bed.
"Sir, is there anything we can get you?" I ask softly. He stares at my, brown eyes wild.
"Fenrik. . ." he gasps. "Fenrik. . ."
"Fenrik." I echo. I turn to the girl who came earlier. She's hovering in a corner looking horror stricken. "You!" I call. "What's your name?"
"Um, Daria," she whispers.
"Go fetch Fenrik," I command. "Elf, blue eyes, blue hair, he works in the quarries. Run, quick!" I glance at the man as Daria runs out the door. I only hope I can get him his dying wish.
(July 21, 2016 - 9:51 pm)