I wrote this

Chatterbox: Inkwell

I wrote this

I wrote this poem...

And I'd like some feedback on it.

Please tell me anything I could change or add.

Here it is:

Locked

A spiral staircase winds down below me, but

There is no reaching the steps

There is only holding on

Onto life,

dreams,

hope,

magic

Off of life,

dreams,

hope,

magic

Two worlds pulling me

On

Off

On

Off

And I am the life

dream

hope

magic

That I have been seeking

 

submitted by Nora the Singer, age 13, New Jersey
(November 16, 2013 - 4:24 pm)

back to the Inkwell

Wow! Nice poem! There is nothing I could change or add to this. Maybe you could use adjectives to describe the dreams, hope and magic to make the poem a little more interesting. Other than that, the poem is great just the way it is. Good job!

submitted by Nina, age 11, Florida
(November 17, 2013 - 9:25 am)