Short - Story

Chatterbox: Inkwell

Short - Story

Short - Story .

Hey everyone . I submitted this on Cicada , and thought you all should have a chance to critique it as well ! So here you go !

 

Searching

I searched the cold , empty house . Around one corner and the next . Behind every door . Nothing . What was I searching for ? I don't know exactly what ; but it was something , anything -- life .

Suddenly , I heard a creaking noise . A sort of loud shriek . I turned sharply in the direction I heard the noise . Fear gripped me to my core . I began to cry .

What was that noise , other than my the beating of my pounding heart , in this frigid and deserted house . I looked down . I was standing in the midst of ... what was it ? A loud gast escaped my tight lips . I was sinking .

I awoke . On the ground . Breathless and sweaty . I strained to look around my dark bedroom . I was at home , on my bedroom floor . I had been ... asleep .

submitted by Vida ^.^, age 13
(October 9, 2013 - 6:21 pm)

back to the Inkwell

Oh my gosh, that's so creepy! Your writing style reminds me of my sister's, who is the best writer I know. So, really, good job!!

submitted by Corina
(October 10, 2013 - 3:18 pm)

Thank you !! I'm sure she's really good !

And , yeaa , it is creepy o.O I have a lot kind of like this .

I was taking a writing class , and we had to have a journal entry every day , so I just wrote short stories or poems. xD

submitted by Vida ^.^
(October 11, 2013 - 2:14 pm)

I like this one! Very spooky, scary, and a mix of everything a book like this needs!

submitted by Ashlee G., age 12, Washington
(October 20, 2013 - 4:16 pm)