(Warning: This is
Chatterbox: Down to Earth
(Warning: This is
(Warning: This is a vent. It will likely be long-winded, emotional, and filled with numerous nerdy references. I hope nothing in this offends or saddens you. I think that's pretty unlikely, but here's to just in case.)
I just realized I didn't really have friends until this past year. Well, that's not totally accurate. In elementary school, I had those people that I hung out with, talked to, and considered friends. They were smart, nice, people, and took dance with me, but they just didn't quite get who I was.
But with them, I was some different, not-so-real, version of Abi, one that pretended to care more than I did about boys and clothes and pop bands, and pretended not to care as much as I did about books, Broadway musicals, and writing. I still like those friends a lot, and they're fun, we share some interests, and I enjoy talking to them.
And then I went to middle school.
TURNING POINT ALERT! TURNING POINT ALERT!
See, here's the thing. My new school is a private school very artsy and very nerdy. The essence of me! When I tell people, "I go to [school's name here]," They say something about how lucky I am. They usually mean because of the great teachers, longer summers, and high Ivy League acceptance rate.
Which are all amazing, by the way. (Especially the teachers.) What was really lucky was that I was the only one from my group of elementary friends to go there. So that meant I kind of had to start over in the friend department.
Don't get me wrong, at first I was sad about this. Later, however, as I met more people, I realized that it was brilliant. If I had gone to the local public school with my old friends, I would have kept on pretending to be Not - Entirely - Abi, and I wouldn't have realized what I was missing.
My new friends are brilliant. They're writers, dreamers, poets, activists, straight A students. People like me who understand the lonliness of not knowing the lyrics to a Taylor Swift song, who write novels and stand up for human rights and fangirl over Hamilton instead of One Direction. They've helped me find who I really was, and stop being embarassed about being a nerd and a bookworm, because they are too.
And now I know, in greatest confidence, that when I go back to school, my friends and I will talk about things like The Cursed Child, what Latin classes are going to be like, how our stories are going. It wasn't just about finding new friends, it was about finding myself. Because I like Real Abi a lot more the one I used to pretend to be.
(August 23, 2016 - 10:15 pm)
I'm so glad you found friends who are interested in the things you are Abi! BTW, your school sounds AWESOME!
(August 24, 2016 - 12:36 pm)
Thanks! And yes, my school is amazing. ^^ Also, top!
(August 24, 2016 - 2:07 pm)
I wanna go to your school!
(August 24, 2016 - 4:58 pm)
LUCKYYYYYYY! I'm ready for a new start like that. And good for you! And congrats on your story in Stone Soup!
Unsolveablez says radx. Yes, it's rad.
(August 24, 2016 - 7:06 pm)
Awwww that's so great! My irl friends are more of the "pop-band" type, and they're still awesome, but my online friends are writers, poets, dreamers, etc as well. I felt really excited as well when I met them. They're... CBers, and some others.
You're school sounds greaaat!
(August 24, 2016 - 8:35 pm)
I'm so happy for you!!! (I love Cursed Child too!)
(August 25, 2016 - 5:07 pm)
That's so great! Your school sounds like so much fun! When I started middle school, I found a friend that came from the other school that feeds into middle school. Anyways, your friends sound amazing and true! Good for you! [That sounded good in my head]
Tht rhymed!
That rhymed!
(August 25, 2016 - 6:06 pm)
I wish I went to a school like yours, Abi. Even the Creative Writing kids in my school aren't nerdy enough to contend with me. I've honestly never been able to pretend I'm something other than I am, and actually have fun with it, you know? All of my friends tease me about being an "old soul" or being too obsessed with Harry Potter and it's funny. Still, that's why I like the CB: there are other people who don't tease me but get me. I just wish there were more people like that in real life.
(August 25, 2016 - 7:35 pm)
I go to a smart school, too, and I have some HP friends, fangirl friends, and such, but I have yet to find someone who loves writing as much as me. Except on CB.
(August 26, 2016 - 6:33 am)
I understand how you feel.
(August 26, 2016 - 9:17 am)
Thanks for all the comments, guys! I'm happy I wrote this thread because it was something that had been bothering me for a while. Yes indeed, my school is awesome, and it's been brilliant to find true friends. <3
(August 26, 2016 - 11:25 am)
Congrats. I'm happy for you.
(August 27, 2016 - 7:11 am)
Hey, Abi, I kinda are similar to that on the CB. KINDA.
Sooo...I'm a nerd, a writer, a Potterhead (I extremely love it, and will peacefully fight off haters. NO VIOLENCE!!!), and a book chatterer supreme...
But nobody on the CB will let me be that, because we already have Nerds, Potterheads, Writers...and so many people are famous for it that nobody will recomend me, or even appreciate me for it, because other people were here first. NOBODY even THINKS that I would ever be a Ravenclaw. But I am.
So?
I became someone who I wasn't. I enrolled in RPs. I pretended to like Hamilton, googling verse by verse. I tried to fit in. And it wasn't fun to struggle at it.
Why can't I fight in? I'm a straight A student and are allot like you guys! But I'm nobody's CB Idol, and the only Award I've got is the Best Name Award (which I still did appreciate!!!!! AN ACTUAL AWARD! :D), just because I haven't been here for years...only A year. And allot of months. When I first stepped out of Kyngdom, Joan dismissed me for a 'new CBer' and I kinda flipped out at her. I know what a Charrie is. I know how to top.
Is it just because I'm not loud about what I love enough?
Why do I have to do this for you guys?
(August 27, 2016 - 8:10 am)
Icy, Icy, Icy...
Never, ever think that you don't "fit in" with us.
You don't have to like Hamilton or RPs. You don't have to be anyone you aren't.
And even if you aren't telling us what you really like, your amazing personality shines through. In each and every post, I can see your spunk, your sense of humor, and you creativity.
If the CB has a flaw, it is that only a few CBers are appreciated to the fulest extent. You are not alone in feeling that people don't recognize you. Winning an award is definetely an accomplishment, because by my estimates there are probably 25-30 regular CBers, and 50 who are still "active"! BTW, those estimates are probably totally inaccurate. ADMINS: How many different CBers do you think there are who post at least once a week?
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that we will accept your amazingness in any format!
Princess Icicle: Hey, Rainbow, are you talking to Frosty's CBer? Can I talk to him? I haven't seen that shy, lazy darling in forever! Yoo-hoo, Frosty!
(August 27, 2016 - 2:36 pm)
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(August 27, 2016 - 2:37 pm)