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So... I've got
Chatterbox: Down to Earth
So... I've got
So... I've got a problem.
Rather a big one.
You know, I think I've used that starter before.
Anyway, it's about... ahem.... crushes.
Seriously. Not the joking-drama-let's-all-have-fun AE crushes. I mean, like, real life.
I bet none of you know or remember Mr. Dwarf. He's a friend of mine. I got him to come on the CB once, and he posted an introductory thread and wrote fanfiction on my fanfiction thread from months and months and months ago.
He pretty much ruined my entire school experience.
You see, I've been liking this guy for a while now. I don't want to think of an alias, so let's just say "him." And, y'know, life was fine for a group of sixth graders. I had some fun times.
And then I started talking to Mr. Dwarf.
He asked who I liked and got it right on the first try.
But hold it. Let's back this up:
At the beginning of the year, for a short period of time, I liked a different guy. I don't now. But then, I told Mr. Dwarf about that too, and he previously knew that this guy liked me back. So he asked if it was okay to tell him. I said it was.
End flashback: He didn't do it this time.
No, of course not. Mr. Dwarf just asked for a private word with my crush and thought it was excusable because he found out he likes me back. Of course I liked that, but it didn't make me any less ticked.
So, he's ruined my life.
Because now... things are awkward. Things are so awkward. I'm pretty much not looking at this guy at all unless he's facing the other direction. I don't talk to him, I avert my gaze, I speed up if he comes near.
And I think this is all part of the process and I think it's going to turn out better than the first time I had a crush. But it's so awkward and I'm getting stressed at school, actually, because I feel like he's watching me all the time (if we have a class together) and I'm getting way more embarrassed and self-conscious than a girl of my personality should be.
Do you guys have any advice for me?
Because I do not like this stress.
Not one bit.
submitted by St.Owl, age Recarnated, Everywhere
(April 12, 2016 - 5:29 pm)
(April 12, 2016 - 5:29 pm)
I'm making semicolon my alias because, well... you're super brave to come out about issues like this, and I don't think I can match that.
Let me explain the context in which I have experience that I think qualifies me to give advice here. If you disagree that the context qualifies me, feel free to completely disregard.
There's a guy in my school who is an amazing nerd. As in he plays about five instruments, reliably turns in a masterpiece for art contest every year, almost always wins the academic achievement prize at school. He's also a nerd in the fandom sense: he reads Harry Potter fanfiction, is a walking Star Wars trivia master, and can reliably hold a conversation about many books, specifically Tamora Pierce books.
He sits next to me in some classes. He's an officer in a club where I'm president. A lot of the other members made us a running joke: we should ask each other out to the school dances, we were told. Consistently.
One day he asked me if I read Harry Potter fanfiction regarding a specific fan theory. I said no, I didn't agree with the theory, but I was open-minded about it. He emailed me fanfiction. I read it, critiqued it. This became a regular thing. We'd give each other "homework": read this book, read this fanfiction. You haven't finished it yet? Come on, I finished this giant book! Watch this video. We trade random trivia, fandom or otherwise. It's a bit of a crush, you might say.
Okay, flashback over.
Basically, this started out with established teasing/awkwardness because we already kind of knew each other and were shipped together (though that doesn't work... there is no good ship name. Both of us have unpronouncable names). And so all it took was some HP fanfiction to start this ball rolling. I'm not planning to ask him out or anything... but if he asks, I'd say yes. So maybe if there's something you want to continue, this crush for instance, you need to be a teensey more active. This is probably useless advice, but... talk. Anything. "Have you read this?" Whatever's easiest. Because now if there's already awkwardness... you've got nothing to lose.
(April 12, 2016 - 7:05 pm)
(April 12, 2016 - 7:05 pm)
Top
(April 13, 2016 - 3:44 pm)
Oh, St …
I've had almost this exact problem three, no four years ago. I had a crush on this guy at my church, and we'd hang out together, discussing the Star Wars fandom, and having fun in general. Then I told another girl that I liked him and — and she told him. When I had asked her NOT to. AND it was in front of every single kid at my church (no grown-ups, thank goodness) and our connection was severed.
Just like that. Buuuut, four years later, we're doing better. My feelings have been transferred to someone else, but we are now friends. Not good friends, just casual friends.
Diagnosis? Time. That's the only thing which I know TOO help. Hopefully, you guys will start talking in a couple months, not … years.
(April 13, 2016 - 7:16 pm)
Now I realize it's nothing alike. Hopefully it helps anyways!
(April 14, 2016 - 6:24 am)
I can't give you advice, because I never talk to any of my crushes. Just too awkward. But I can say that it'll turn out just fine! I think you will get past the awkward stage soon.
P.S. I totally ship you two! EEEEEEEEEEEEE!(Sorry, my fangirl instincts are kicking in)
(April 13, 2016 - 7:33 pm)
Admin, St. Owl was allowed to post about fanfiction? When I wanted to post about fanfiction, you wouldn't let me.
We aren't allowed to enable other websites over which we have no control, with a very exceptions that we carefully screen and monitor. I have no idea what was posted here or not posted unless you can be specific.
Admin
(April 13, 2016 - 9:29 pm)
Admin, St. Owl was allowed to post about fanfiction? When I wanted to post about fanfiction, you wouldn't let me.
(April 13, 2016 - 9:29 pm)
Okay, for one, I don't quite understand. Does your previous crush still like you? Do you still like him?
Anyhow, I think all you need to do is walk up to Mr. Drawf and just say something, like, "it's been awhile. What's up?"
Yes, crushes can make a lot of stress. But just relax and talk to him.
Lame advice, I know.
As for me, I don't have any crush stories. (seriously)
(April 13, 2016 - 10:54 pm)
Novelist:
Oh, no, Mr. Dwarf wasn't my crush! He was the person who told my crush I liked him.
I don't still like my previous crush (I mean, we're friends, but I don't like-like him). I don't know if he still likes me, but it doesn't seem like it.
Thank you all for the advice! We've started talking a bit more, I think, going back into the Harry Potter trivia now (yes, that is what I do with my friends). So it's getting better!
(April 14, 2016 - 3:33 pm)
Good! (Really good compared to my horrible story)
(April 15, 2016 - 10:05 am)