Meh.......I am supposed to be at my online Student Council meeting, but I was so bored I came here instead. What am I supposed to do here again? *someone whispers in my ear* Oh, yeah, make ya laugh. I think I'm horribly failing right now. *yawns* Oh, did you know that for some weird reason random humor makes me laugh so hard that I have to literally stuff my face in my bedsheets so no one hears me laughing and calls the doctor to inquire about my mental health. I'M FINE, OKAY? It's just my natural weirdness. Oh, and is anyone else here deathly scared of those wierd troll/I don't know what meme faces? They creep me out, and they really annoy me too. I know, I'm crazy. Whatever. Why am I rambling like this anyway? Who knew boredom did this to people. Boredom is cruel. I should be going back to my meeting, but I don't want to!! Meetings are bo-o-rr-iii-nn-gg. Meh. I think I'll drag myself back now. *slowly begins to trudge away* Oh, and how could I forget, POST SOMETHING, you guys!!

Will: Hi.

Will: Soooo...make you guys laugh, huh? (akward silence occurs for five minutes)

Interviewer with the recording thingymajiggy: Well, anything funny to say?

W: Well, I could tell you about the time I accidently made cottage cheese out of old milk.

IWRT: P-please! (clears throat) I mean, something other than that please.

W: Um...hi.

IWRT: (slaps himself in the face about five times before running his head into the wall)

W: Soooo............cottage cheese anyone? 

Think serious thoughts....

Don't laugh. Don't laugh.

Of course now I'm going to start thinking about the time I tried to feed a pig bacon.

Host: iiiiiiinteresting! Tell us!
Me: I was eating bacon. There was too much bacon. I asked if I could have it. Mom said no. Sometimes mom is very mean.

I went to feed the pig the bacon. The pig looked at the bacon. The pig looked at me. The pig looked at the bacon. That continued for several minutes.

Then the pig nibbled at the bacon. Its eyes got very wide. It started spitting. Then it... ah.... relieved itself on the bacon. About ten times. Then it looked up at me. And it jumped onto me. Instead of attacking me, it said, "YOU MADE ME A CANNONBALL!" and then left. Then it said, "Slops, please."

And the day went on.

As usual.

Until I saw the picachu.

That thing was eating my pickles.

My precious pickles!!!!
Naturally I could not let it eat my pickles. Pickles are life. So I said, "Get out of here!"

Pickachu said, "Pickachu!"
I said, "You know you're voted as one of the most annoying TV show characters."
Pickachu ate a pickle.

I snatched my pickles away. "Get out" I said.

The picachu got out.

I found worms in my matteress that night.

(yes. I am terrible at humor.)

Did sombody say a wolf ate Peeta Mellark? Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!  Poor poor Katniss; everyone she loves is dying waaàaaaaa! 

I am very proud I have gotten through all of these without laughing but I have a story for you ... it is actually a true story that happened at the very last theatre practice before my school's play (Cinderella and the Substitute Fairy Godmother).

Me: Lines blablah saying my lines blahblah

Prince Charmfull: His lines blahblah blablah

Enter Evil Stepsister wearing santa pants 

Evil Stepsister: Your majesty, I am so pleased to meet you.

Charmfull: uh ... I'm sorry what's my line ... I ... she's ... She's wearing sant pants ... I mean where did you even get those

Stepsister: Backstage with the rest of the old props

Charmfull: Lines blah bla- *Laughing* I'm sorry but you're wearing santa pants and I ... you need to take those off - that is so distracting

Everybody on stage is laughing by this point.

Charmfull: Okay we need to do this, everybody stop laughing! (this doesn't work). Think of dead puppies!

Me: What, no, that's awful!

Charmfull: Yeah but it's not funny so you'll stop laughing.

Then the rest of rehearsal kind of proceeded in the same manner and nobody could keep it together and besides the santa pants, the girl playing the stepsister broke her foot and was on crutches and Prince Charmfull was played by a girl because only one boy in my school (it's a small school) was in theatre and he played the king and I played the Queen and all three of us are friends and it was rather awkward and the whole time this was going on he was playing with his crown and it was on sideways and the girl playing the stepsister is his real life sister so there was also a lot of sibling-ness in the play and also meanwhile a person from set design was watching us rehearse and they kept moving around on the floor and it was incredibly distracting and this is a really long run on sentence but wait there is more: our teacher was actually pretty okay with all of this beacause we all knew our lines and everything and he said there is a saying that if your last rehearsal is a mess your first performance would be great and it was, but our second performance was also a mess because about a half hour before it started we had to call the fire department because it was a dinner theatre and some kids got stuck in the elevator bringing food upstairs. 

And so if you got through that without laughing, bravo! Maybe it's only funny if you were there though; my rendition doesn't do it justice. Really if you got through it all you deserve a medal because that last part was a really long run on sentence.  

Danie: *Ahem* So, I haven't laughed. *whips hair* I mean, like, I'm, like, AMAZING at, like, not laughing. And, like-

Squeak: PLEEAAASSSE. Your horrible and unintelligent nonsense make my head curl fro-

Danie: SHUT UP ALREADY. *brings paper* Anyone want to trade alter egos? Sign here. *cricket cricket* Fine. *slams paper*

Danie: This is too HARD. *laughs* Gee, look, I'm laughing at myself! So you must laugh too... Right? Right?! *cricket cricket* BE QUIET CRICKETS. NO ONE LIKES YOU. *stuffs crickets into a bucket* There.

Squeak: I'm BORED.

Danie: Too BAD.

Squeak: Ug.

Danie: Urg.

Squeak: Eh.

Danie: Meh.

Squeak: Meep.

Danie: Deep.

Squeak: Derp.

Danie: Ug to Derp. Ookkkkayyyy then.

Squeak: Eh.

Danie: gee, I'm good at making people laugh when I'm actually TALKING to them, not TYPING TO THEM. Heck with this, I'm just gonna wing it.

Danie: numberoneruletofunnyalwayslaughnumbertwoalwayssingsongsithelpsnumberthreesayfornarniaiehelpsandthisisgettingtolonguhhhhggg

Squeak: What? Squeeze that in, please. I get read it that far.

Danie: Whatevs. 

Squeak: Okay, I'm done. This is getting way to boring and repetitive. *forces Snuggles to say something* Niva! Niva? What does that mean? Needa? Need a? Need a what? Aw, heck with this. Let's just submit to the admins, since they rule. (hah! Pun there. Hope you thought it punny...)