We were watching a movie in Social Studies because EOGs were over. Ms Ladd made sure we could all watch PG-13 movies though. I told the guy I like about Tess and he understood. He's helped me so much more than he'll ever know. Tess told some of her really close friends her secret, and one of them told Tiara and Tiara wouldn't tell me who told her because with her it's all about getting even

Religion and nonreligion. This is something I've been dealing with for a while now, but only recently I decided that enough was enough and told my parents. They're both Christian, and they've raised me and my younger sister Christian. We went to church pretty much every Sunday, I went to youth group, my sister went to youth group for fifth graders, we did VBS and I've volunteered to help with VBS and everything. The church had a small group for each grade and gender, so I was still going to the freshman girls group at the beginning of the year. I stopped for a while because of the tennis team, and after that it got harder and harder to go because of homework and because I hadn't really wanted to go for a few months and it became easier and easier to excuse myself and not go. I stopped going to youth group for the same reasons. I didn't want to tell my parents I was an atheist for the longest time because I honestly had no idea how they would react.

I finally did tell them, about a month or so ago. The youth director of our church was leaving (I'm not clear on the reasons) and summer is when the high schoolers have a three-week thing: First is volunteering and leading a group of middle school kids for a week in RSG (Ready Set Go, the VBS for middle schoolers) then a week-long trip down to this camp in Georgia, and then a week-long misson trip to build houses in West Virginia. My family has always been involved in the church, and I had been too. My mom has been a deacon for something like five years, and my dad has been volunteering with a program my sister went to for six years, ever since I was in that program. I decided that it was better for me to tell them now rather than later, and they took it pretty well. I learned a lot about what they believe and why they go to church, and I thought everything was alright.

And then, (we had the conversation on a Thursday) the Sunday a week after our conversation, it was, "[Real Name] we're going to church." And I said no, I wasn't, and hadn't we discussed this? But they made me go, and I could have put up more of a fight, but it was eight in the morning three weeks before finals. I went, and rationalized it- my sister was playing violin in church that day, so that's why they made me go. But the next Sunday, it was the same thing, and I said no, I wasn't going and we had a really big argument that ended with me in tears because whenever I argue about something like this with my parents, it ends with me crying. But in the end, I haven't had to go because my parents had two main reasons they wanted me to go: it was a family activity and it was because of the community. I told them that the church community was based on the assumption that everybody had the same set of beliefs about a certain subject, and I did not share those beliefs. I also told them that I would be doing the same thing I had been doing for a few months: I would sit in the service, then walk home, and in the process talk to four people.

So I don't have any idea how this is going to finally end up. They haven't made me do anything since. I honestly understand if they want me to go because my younger sister is performing or something, and I'll go then if she does. My parents hold all the power, and I'm scared.

There's other things too: I hate USTA tennis tournaments, and most tennis tournaments in general, but I still have to do them. I don't like playing piano, and I haven't since fifth grade, but I'm still taking lessons and going to contests. School was mostly easy this year, partly because I was lucky in the teachers I got, and partly because I did well enough in my classes that it didn't really matter what I got on my finals and I'd still keep my A.

I have two friends circles: the group of people I generally hang out with, eat lunch with, and the church group of friends, none of which I had any classes (not even the same lunch period) with or did any of the same sports, so we haven't really talked too much this year, but I still count them as my friends. I haven't told them anything, but I've mentioned to a few of them that I won't be doing the summer church stuff this year, but I haven't told them why.

Sorry for the long and rambly post.

@TNO

I guess it really depends on the person then.