Chatterbox: Chirp at Cricket

I lost the game.

Have you seen it?

I've been searching for years, but maybe it's like an electron in the electron cloud—you can either know where it is right then or where it's going. I know where the game is going. I know it's spreading, catching like black fire, a plague that cannot be stopped. But I don't know where it is right now... perhaps it's lost forever.

I'll start at the beginning, shall I?

1. If you know about the game, you're playing the game.

Basically, now everyone who has read this is playing the game. Please note that the game is not optional. It does not require your consent to play it. There is no way to say "I don't play the game."

2. If you think about the game, you lose the game.

From a standpoint of sanity, you have a five minute cooldown in-between each time you lose the game, allowing you a chance to forget it all before it happens again.

3. If you lose the game, you have to announce "I lost the game."

This can be announced verbally, or some other method, i.e. posting it on chatterbox or flashing it from a flashlight using morse code at 3 a.m. in the morning (note, this is not an advisable course of action, seeing as people are not usually understanding about flashlights and morse code at 3 a.m. Do not try this at home, or at any other place it might not be appreciated). You do not have to say exactly "I lost the game," you may say things along the lines of "have you seen the game," or "I can't find the game," or even "iltg" (I Lost The Game), but you must provide easy hints that you have indeed, lost the game. 

4. There is no way to win the game.

Probably?